What a weird dream! I was running and running, but never getting anywhere. Then this giant hand pushed me around on my back, and it felt so good I started doing it by myself. And it kept happening over and over, like some kind of endless loop…
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Oh yes, darling (click, click), lie back now (click, click, click)… now lift your head (click, click), give us a pouty look (click, click)… perfect, darling (click, click)…
Now look at the horizon (click), imagine a studly Weimaraner (click, click), stepping from the pool (click, click)… That’s super, love, let us feel it (click, click, click)…
All right, darling (click, click), give us a smile (click, click, click)… Arch your back a bit more (click, click)… Smashing, love, hold that pose (click, click, click, click)…
Hey ladies and gentlemen glad ya could make it how’s everybody doin’ tonight that’s great ok this next act is the funniest comic working the dogmouth circuit today you’re gonna love him put your hands together for Rocky Boffo let’s hear it…
Good evening hey it’s great to be here so I tell my psychiatrist I think I’m a deck of cards he says I’ll deal with you later and my girlfriend’s a one-legged waitress yeah she works at ihop but seriously folks what’s the deal with these airline peanuts…
Is that a pinball machine part in picture one, Natalie F.? (And am I a geek for knowing that?) (Update: It’s a finger puppet. Thanks to various commenters for the info.)
Fiesta Deck or Promenade Deck!? Fiesta Deck or Promenade Deck!? Fiesta Deck or Promenade Deck!? Fiesta Deck or Promenade Deck!? [Alternating feets touching ground] I don’t see your name on my clipboard! I don’t see your name on my clipboard! I don’t see your name on my clipboard!
Listen, we both know this hasn’t been working for a while. We’ve been drifting apart for some time, and well…there’s someone else. You can’t be surprised. I mean, what did you expect? He gives me everything you wouldn’t – namely, table scraps.
Authorities believe the photographer is also the owner of these cicadas pugs. She has not been seen since this photo was taken, and with the petals found ditched on the side of the road, police are fearing the worst.
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