Confucius Otter Say

[Pats paws together]

He who run through airport naked is going to Bangkok.

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Luis F. That’s good, er, advice.

Let’s Get Ready To Rhumba!

Tonight on "Dancing With The Stars: Galapagos Edition," reigning champions Missy McGuire and Kent Schmecknick, from the hit TV series "Unspeakably Ugly Betty" defend their title in the Latin freestyle category.

Iguana hold your hand...

Are they working for scale, Doug B? (More photos here)

Not what you’d expect a mile out in the lake

Don’t anyone go to Snopes.com and blow it. I don’t care if this story was completely fabricated, it’s hella sweet.

Apparently, a mile and a half out, a small fishing boat discovered…

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Wait is that….?

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Yes! A distraught deer obviously looking for his waterski tow!

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Thankfully, this hulking Marine helped land the confused ani-pal an everyone was escorted back to shore. Ahnnn. [Head tilt]

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Kinda exhasting, Jehn B. [wiping brow]

And now, MOOSES IN SPRINKLERS!

Back to BACK

Moose in SPRINKLER ACTION

YOU HEARD ME

Next up, it’s—yes, more meeses in sprinklers

Next up, it’s—yes, even more meeses in sprinklers

To Jehn B. and all the other fine, fine Peeps who sent these in, large moose-tongue-sized sprinkler slurps of thanks.

THIS JUST IN: Tiny Trunks

The second baby elephant in as many months hit the Pittsburgh Zoo this morning. More on the bébés over at the Pittsburgh Post Gazette.

That guy could give you the Wet Willie of a lifetime ifyouknowwhatimean.

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The Amazing Remote-Control Otters!

OK, for this next trick, you need to get a remote-control device.  TV, stereo, it doesn’t really matter, as long as it has a really big button on it.  Go ahead, we’ll wait. (elevator music, dum dee dum…)  Got it?  Now, incredible as this may sound, your remote control will let you switch off these otters’ brains all at once.  Start the video, and get ready to push the really big button … right … about …

(00:24) … now.  Was that cool or what?!
Wait, we’re gonna do it again.  On your mark … get set …

(00:36) … click.

Wow, Philip K., that was totally (click) …

… awesome.

The Dark Knight Knursery

Where will the Batmen of tomorrow come from?  Possibly from the rescue centre on the Atherton Tablelands in northern Queensland, Australia, which is caring for these orphaned bat-babies.

Holy bundles of joy!

Bring on the tiny little Jokers!

Why so serious?

That was knice and knoteworthy, Kira K.

When You Wish Upon a Pod

Once upon a time, in a faraway land called Borneo, where they filmed either Survivor or Gilligan’s Island, I always get those two mixed up, there was a Cuteologist named Maya A.  One fine day, as Maya was walking through a rainforest so mysterious and remote that it didn’t even have a Jamba Juice yet, she encountered one of the clever forest gremlins who disguised themselves as seed pods to avoid anthropologists and bill collectors.

No, I'm not Señor Wences.  I get that a lot.

Quick as a wink, Maya scooped him up.  "I will grant you three wishes," said the gremlin as he struggled, "but you must promise to release me, and give me a …

"C.O. EXTREME CLOSE-UP!!!!"

This is a close-up?!

"Whoa there, Spielberg — not that close.  Back it up a little."

Thanks for the sour persimmons, cousin.

"Yeah, that works.  Okay, back to the three wishes.  Naturally, there’s some fine print, so listen up:  First, no wishing for more wishes; I saw Aladdin too, smartypants, so don’t embarrass yourself.  Second, Pierce Brosnan’s married, so just deal with it.  And finally, if you wish for an iPhone, there’s a three-week wait plus an activation charge."

All rightie then, fellow cuteaholics — what would YOUR three wishes be?

You little STINKER!

You are SUCH a little stinker.

Look at you. Stinking up the place.

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Ew! Annie M.! via HAPPYLOLDAY. Photo by LadiesWhoKill.

Insane in the mem!

Um.

This is both heartwarming AND hilarious at the same time. Are these crazy Peruvians for reals? Please get a load of this Sea Lion Rehabilitayshe Action. Meanwhile, I’ll be bellowing crazy sea lion sounds to whomever will listennnnBAROOOOGAH!

Please go up to your officemate and bellow in his ear, Adrian W. Please. Then send us a video of it.

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