ANOTHER Stretch-a-thon

[Kitteh] I can stretch further than you can, Bee-yatch.
[Puppeh]
I’ve had it with your "contests"—

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[Kitteh] WATCH MEH—EHN! [belly splays out]
[Puppeh, offscreen, sighs, rolls eyes]

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[Puppeh]
Fine, I’ll show you a streeeeetch Ehn! [Tail flops forward]

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[Kitteh] You call that a stretch!? Check this out, MoFo! [Proceeds to break back in half]

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[Kitteh]
I think we KNOW who the winner of this Stretch-a-thon is now. [Proceeds to Honk-Shu land]
[Puppeh, under breath]
ElasticLittleGoodFerNuthin’LimberGymnastGrumbleGrumble!

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Nice rubber kitteh, Jennifer C.!

Miss September, Becky McBleen

Turn-ons: Honesty, long walks on the beach, extra gravy in my kibble, world peace.

Turn-offs: Judgmental people, Mondays, those two cats from next door who won’t stop hissing at me, voice mail.

Ambitions: I guess I want what every modern dog wants — to balance a home life and a career, treat every day like a new adventure, and always follow the path my heart wants me to follow.

... oh yeah, and go to Europe.

I only read Cute Overload for the articles, Kateryna A.  No, really.

Ay-yei-YE!

Leesten to thees, my Babees.

Eef you go ento a Taco Bayle, and you ask for dee Gordita "Animal Style", dey weel put dee extra kibbles in it.

You keep dees secret safe—I mean eet, Mang.

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Gracias, Betty Belly Brown Bear (wearing sombrero) Tina, Kate and Ben G.

I’m not mad, I’m just disappointed

[Dad] Sons?

Beagle01

[Sons] Yes Dad? (polite paw posishe)

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[Dad] Did you pee on the pee pads like I told you?

Beagle01

[Sons, shifty eyed] um Yes, Dad

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[Dad] Do you want to revise that answer?

Beagle01

Madeleine S., they are innocent until proven soooooo guilty

What? I do ALL my video shoots in the bathroom

Wrinkles McWhinersons is all get me down, I gots me some bidet water to slurp!

Thanks for the bonus yipping action, Cass.

These Boots Were Made For Stalking…

… and that’s just what they’ll do / One of these days these boots are gonna whap you on the nose (whap whap whap whap whap!) and then tear through the living room (neeeeeaarrrrggghhhhhhmmmmm!!) and then climb up the drapes (wheeeeeeeeeeeeee!) and then knock the planter off the kitchen counter (crash! whoopsie!) and then totally declare war on your tail (yaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrr!) and then whap you on the nose some more (whap-ity whap!) and then fall asleep (honk-shuuuuuuuuu!).

A little closer ... closer ... cloooooserrrr

Cowgirl UP, Judy O!

Get me the oxygen tank STAT

Questions for you:

1. Could this pup be MORE prosh? [Answer: Nyerhe!]
2. Can’t you practically FEEL the mini-snorting schnozzle on your face? [Answer: yeees!]
3. Did you hit your screen reaching for that teeny Tailio Iglesias? [Answer: Gone to emergency room to fix broken fingers]


PeekaBoo!!!, originally uploaded by JodieBean.

Help me Obi Wan, You’re my only hope! [repeat]

Hep! Hep meh!

[Zzzzz movie crackles and fades]


Obi Wan Kenobi, originally uploaded by JodieBean.

These are not the puppies you’re looking for, Mary W.!

C.O. Travel Tips!

When traveling in the north of France, be sure to visit the village of Bain de Puce, home to the Monks of the Order of St. Dogustine. Members of The Order, which is world-renowned for producing the finest gourmet kibble, are sworn to a strict code of conduct, including no barking, no chasing cars, and not doing that thing with your leg.

Utbay atscay areyay illstay airfay amegay

Did you bring back some kibble, Joanna M.?

[This hoopy frood clearly knows where his towel is. - Ed.]

I will go to Beijing—I WILL GO TO BEIJING!

and I shall win the gold

I WILL WIN THE GOLD!

[legs shudder in sleep] Ehn!

Beijing_bound

Your pup already looks half-panda, so he’ll fit right in, Lauren M.! ;)

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