Have You Been Good This Year?

"Hyup hyup, I been a good dog all year, sure have, hyup hyup!  I didn’t chase cars, or dig in the garden, or send Nigerian scam e-mails or nothin’!"

See, this is why we can't have nice things.

"And I especially didn’t tear open the Mark Cross titanium fountain pen set with the pearl inlay that was wrapped in the pretty red paper with the little cherubs on it and smear the ink all over the Persian rug, nope, didn’t do it, never saw it, nope nope."

Ri-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ght ...

I think we can forgo the lie detector test, Wendy F.

Friday Staff Meeting

… and our final action item for today, in regards to re-purposing the deliverables for the Q1 global co-localization initiative going forward …

… we’re experiencing push-back over negative asset retention metrics, vis-a-vis our mission-critical relationship management wombat …

… at the end of the day, to synergize a best-of-breed flapdoodle customer-oriented splinky narfle paradigm wumpus noodle fleeple spork …

Brought to you by CuteThingsFallingAsleep.org, the most comprehensive resource for cute things falling asleep in the entire global history of cute things falling asleep.

And now, Puppehs unwrapping Christmas Prezzles

There is pretty moshe only one feeling that can accompany this video, and that is pure joy, People! Check it!

Am I right, Stephen V.?

OMG you’re home! OMG you’re home! OMG you’re home!

OMG you’re home!

OMG you’re home!

OMG you’re hoooooooome! [Beady eyes twinkle with delight]

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Home! Home! Home! Home! Home!

Encore Presentayshe: Bailey the Unknown Reindeer

Johanna S. reminded us it’s time for a little “Bailey the Unknown Reindeer” action again this year. Without further ado, HERE WE GERHE!

Nice Harry Connick action too, Johanna S.!

Land of the Rising Pom

"Konnichiwa! and welcome to Sushi Kennel!  Our specials this week are Milk-Bone-shaped tuna, and the California Roll-Over-and-Play-Dead.  May I bring you a hot towel and sake before ordering?"

Kimono my house, mon amour...

Domo arigato, sender-inner-san Ariana G.

Quite possibly the awesomest photo ever submitted

It’s… TONGUE’S EYE VIEW!!! [blazing guitar riff sound] Ow!

0125

Whooooooooooaaaa! "Baron (Large Tongue)" by Alex R.

Little Bo Peep Gets Pwned

LBP:  HAI GUISE!  im LilBoPeep and im lukin 4 my sheep.  U d00dz seen sheep?
Dog1: ZOMG no wai I havnt seen ur stoopid sheep
Dog2: Baaaaaaaa GTFO n00b!
LBP:  whatevs, l8r lusers

You owe me, pal.

Took me a second to spot it, Paige K.

[This morning's post brought to you by chat rooms, texting, the violent death of all civilized language, and by the number 1337... - Ed.]

MONKEY JOCKEYS FOR ALL YOUR PROMOTIONAL NEEDS!

Welll THAT’S a relief. I was worried I would have to forgo the primate action for my next promo. [wiping brow] See Banana Derby.com for more details (for your promotional needs). You heard me; BananaDerby.com.

Dillion_george31372922_std1

Boing Boing found this one….

Amazing Love Secrets Revealed!

‘allo!  Mah nahm ees Joost-een LeFonque, an’ ah weel teach yoo ze see-crahts of LOFFF!  Ze farst see-craht ees ze aaht-moss-pheer.  Eet mosst be ze rho-man-teek for ze beoot-ee-ful lah-deez, wis ze can-dalls and ze bahth wis ze boob-bahls.

Waance you haf ze rho-man-teek aaht-moss-pheer, yoo waal-come ze lah-deez …

'allo, mah dar-leengs...

… AND HEEP-NO-TIZE ZEM WEETH YAR LAH-ZAR VEE-SHON!!  BZZZZZZZZZZZZTTT!!

Wot’s dat, yoo say?  Yoo do not haf ze lah-zar vee-shon?  Dan yoo can-not haf ze LOFF!!

Eet also halps me evade ze traf-feek tee-kets!

Bow wow chicka bow wow, Alexis L.

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