I Got A Million Of ‘Em!

A grasshopper walks into a bar and the bartender says, "We have a drink named after you."  Grasshopper says, "You have a drink named Steve?"

Charles Dickens walks into a bar and orders a martini.  The bartender asks him, "olive or twist?"

A five-dollar bill walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out, this is a singles bar!"

C’mon, let’s hear your best one-liners in the Comments…

I don’t know about this Global Pugsitioning Unit…

It’s supposed to get us to our destination, but it’s not really working…

It’s making me go thru yellow lights at top speeds…

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I was supposed to be at the office an hour ago, but somehow we ended up at the beach…

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And it’s konking out on the job.

I think we need a new one.

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Sender-Inner Lucy says: Baby Otis is only 3 month old and doesn’t give good directions yet…

It’s Game Time!

Good afternoon, sports fans!  Well, this is it: The granddaddy of them all, the brass ring, the game for all the marbles — the Super Bowl.  And with it comes the time-honored Super Bowl traditions; first, dressing up the pets so they can share in all the Super Bowl excitement!

Oh yeah, I'm feeling it.  How about you, Stan?

Like, rah.

And if that’s not thrilling enough, it’s time once again for the Animal Planet Puppy Bowl!  Here are highlights from last year’s action-packed game!

Thanks to Chief Sister Officer for the Steelers pet pics!

Tie-Tie on Caturday

"WHOO! What a tiring Caturday."

[Dragging gut on ground along with ears]

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[Flop]

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Daisy-shoo…. daisy-shoooooo (Say in ‘honk shu’ voice)

The Cute Overload Music Depreciation Society

Here at The Cute Overload Music Depreciation Society, we help our students cultivate a refined ear for all forms of music, from opera…

… to classic Delta Blues.

Lemme show you my muzzlepowshe collection

[Motioning you down a loooonnng, ridiculous hallway]

"And here are the more common muzzlepowshes… this beady-eyed stuffed pug was owned by a French Baron."

"Over there is my famous whisker collection…"

Pug

"Let me show you more, Alison F.! this way!"  [More over at Etsy!]

Cute Overload Super Xtreme Games Ultra Challenge!

Welcome, sports fans!  And going first in the "Freestyle Toss Up" category is Pickle, catching some righteous airtime as she soars over the stadium!  Way to work those ears, Pickle!

On your mark...

… and up next is Seitan, rockin’ it with a perfect 90-degree mid-air twist!  Radical!

... get set...

… and finally, we have Seymore, who’ll be attempting a gnarly double back-flip followed by… Whoa!  Seymore misses the target completely and heads right into the stands!  Oh, that’s gonna be some points off — bummer, Seymore!

... NUFF!

And now it’s over to Irene for the post-game wrap-up!

THIS JUST IN: A Dust Ball

You can’t tell the difference between this puppeh and a Totoro Dust Ball.

OK, the pup has a collar. But if the dust ball had a collar, you couldn’t tell.

Dustball

Check it: [double take neck spasm]

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Dust Balls! Now available without collars at Skankazon!

May I Take Your Dream Order?

… all right then, so that’s four endless bowls of milk, three cars that let you catch them, one Godlike Mastery over Space and Time, and a chew toy.  Will there be anything else?

You know puppies are happy when they even SLEEP in smile formation.

What’s your dream order, Andrea B.?

Listen Kid, shut up and get in the chopper

"I’ll explain on our way to Nicaragua" [chomps bone]

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What adventure IS Kobe talking about, April P.?

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