Herbert recently lost his job as the household doorstop, so when The Dog offered him the opportunity, he couldn’t turn it down. You see, The Cat had recently upped his efforts to sabotage The Dog; and he suspected his Kibble was being poisoned in an attempt to be dethroned as man’s best friend. Frankly, Herbert felt bad for him, because let’s face it, The Dog was not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
Listen, Dog, I agreed to test your food, but do you have to hover over me like some kind drooly sweater?
I’m putting my neck on the line for you, the least you could’ve done was supply a step ladder.
I’m going to be honest with you: this crap you call food is so disgusting that I wouldn’t know if it was poisoned or not. Here’s an idea, maybe stop being so eager to please everyone and demand a real meal.
Take one step closer to me, Dog, and I’ll go straight to The Cat and tell him that you want to replace his kitty litter with Pop Rocks Candy.
Good luck with this situation, Kristin B.
Let me get this straight: You’re trying to offer me that…for this? Oh, honey. If you think I’m letting go of this anytime soon, then you might as well believe that Mensa is gonna be recruiting you. I mean, that’s like me offering you tofu for a Twinkie.
If I were you, I’d back the hell up. Because on top of being highly unpredictable, I’m, like, 8 feet tall and foaming at the mouth with Cheetos dust.
Next time, maybe you won’t offer him a cashew. But on the other hand, look at those adorably clawed prongs, Pea H.
For the special times—when only the best will do—reach for the hamster trusted by more families than any other: Floofmann’s Canned Ham.
That’s because Floofmann’s chooses only the freshest, proshest hams, with 30 percent more ‘tocks,* picked at their peak of redonku-liciousness.
And now, so that you may savor the jaw-dropping cleverness:
* Do we even want to know how you got 30% more ‘tocks, Julie and Ron?
by Meg on October 4, 2009
According to ham-tographer Laura-Elizabeth; “They pile themselves up in this warm cozy pouch and when they hear me coming to see them all tumble out at once. Ridiculous hams.”
Sleepy Pouch by Laura-Elizabeth was suggested via Twitter by FourHams.
Ever since Eveyln said her ass was the size of an acorn, Ruth had exhausted herself doing Pilates.
Self-conscious squirrels are a sad breed, Maggie H.
by Meg on September 28, 2009
by Meg on September 26, 2009
These dewds totally look like John and Yoko, only rattier.
The way things are going, they’re gonna crucify me, Lana M.!
Photo by Jessica F.
A-a-ah y-y-yes, th-th-the ev-ev-ever p-p-popular “vi-vi-vibrating p-p-party h-h-hat” t-t-trick… V-v-very f-f-funny…
Did you bring enough Fig Newtons for everyone, Lesley G.?
by Meg on September 24, 2009
According to picture-taker Simple Tess;
“I caught my mother’s cat playing with this baby chipmunk. He curled up in my hand and did not seem to want to leave. I found his family’s hole and set him by it. He slowly retreated to the hole, but turned around to look back out at me and considered coming back to my hands! It was love.”
Cute Overload Xtreme Munk Up!
SimpleTess, that is some great eye capsule action…
