[chipmonnk voice] “Oh, were you gonna eat this?”
Surely you can spare one, Julia G.?
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Posts tagged as:
Pocket Pets
Damn hamsters are always ME ME ME!
Stephanie W., I hope things improve.
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…Because you’ve seen Hilda’s ears, right? It’s like two furry Venus Flytraps just sprouted out of her head – oh, poo! Sweetie, did I not mention that I needed a French manicure today –anyway, I mean, Hilda has a cute face…it it weren’t for those pipe cleaners she calls whiskers. It’s like, ‘What, did a 5-year-old invent you?’
By the way, how do my brows look? It’s like the one thing Hilda does right, you know?
Um, no. I did not ask for two “creepy cocoons” to be placed above my eyes. Where is Hilda. I need to speak with her.
You could just use Chunk’s whiskers as Q-Tips, Deidra L.
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Oh, noooooo! Mr. Stripey has fallen into the Pit of Ultimate Sorrow! Don’t move, Mr. Stripey — I’ll be right back with a rope and a cable news crew!
Has “Smudge” met our resident hustler, Chris G.?
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I’m an old cowham, just a-riding ’round the land
Got a toothpick in my mouth and a lasso in my hand
Gotta round up all the piggies, keep an eye out for the strays,
‘Cuz they’s orn’ry little critters, runnin’ every which-a-ways.
So it’s chase ‘em down and land ‘em, tie ‘em up and brand ‘em,
Some days ya gotta love ‘em, and others ya can’t stand ‘em.
Gotta drive ‘em cross the prairie, forty mile to get your pay,
Then we spend it all in town, chompin’ corn and brocc-a-lay…
Yo-de-layyyyyy… yee-haaaayyyy… de-hooooooo!
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Winnie the Pig had a date. A hot date. It was his first in weeks, and since he wasn’t about to go and blow it, he had to make sure everything was just right. So obviously, he brought in reinforcements:
Listen, if it was your intention to bathe in Drakkar Noir and possibly kill your date with cheesiness, then you exceeded expectations. I mean, I think my nose may have stopped twitching.
Here’s the thing: It looks like Arthur Fonzarelli took a greased comb to your hair, and yet it doesn’t occur to you to pluck a nose hair? It’s surprising considering they’re practically hindering your eyesight.
Here’s to the partnership, Maria L.
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If I feed you parsley, will you unclog the Innernets? Please?
[Grabbing cilantro just in case.]
Thanks, Mathijs and Lucy 4.0 over at HamsterTracker, where Lucy helps power the Internets on her wheel, one meter at a time. At press time, Lucy’s at 146,119.47 meters in 48 days.
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Sweetness meets sweetness
Will your haiku stay crunchy
Even within milk?
Dig ‘em, Megan G. (No, wait, that’s Smacks.)
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Hey there, kids! Welcome to my super-fun TV playhouse! All my favorite TV pals are here, like Bucky Bear, and Sally the White Object That Might Be a Bunny (I think she passed out on the swing set)!
And you’re just in time to see me hop on my flying carpet and travel …
To the moon! OK, here I am on the moon… The lunar surface is really bumpy…
… and it smells just like fabric softener! Oh, well, as long as I don’t meet up with any scary moon monsters I should be…
… fine.
Benny’s TV Playhouse is a Jess E. Production! Benny trained by Jess E.! Sets designed by Jess E.! Benny designed by Benny’s mom and dad! Photos by Jess E. and Jess E.’s Mom! Executive Senior Script Consultant, NTMTOM! Fake moon landing set by NASA (I knew it)! See’ya next week, kids, YAAAAAY!!!
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Doctors have yet to determine a trigger, but all unanimously agree that when one lapses, they all lapse. One of the more tragic cases focuses on Hammy. When asked how he got himself into such a sad mess, he responded:
“Maru, OK! I learned it by watching Maru!“
Poppy was one-of-a-kind, Karen B.
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