It’s 6AM ET/9AM PT. St. Patrick’s Day. Time for a beer.

"TIME FOR YOUR FIRST BEER NOW OPEN WIDE!"

[Pours Guinness down your froat]

Happy St. Patrick’s Day to EVERYONE! Celebratory photo Anyone for Guinness? by Blazingstar.

The New Bird Clashes With Everything

"Mama’s little favorite, aren’t we?  I suppose you think you’re soooo much better than I am, just because you happen to match the furniture!"

Why, yes.  Yes, I am.

I think he really ties the room together, Kathy F.

Breaking News Bulletin!

NEW JERSEY—Bodyguards protect Percival Q. Gringflabble, alleged Mafia accountant, as he arrives at the Federal courthouse to testify against his employers.

BlackCatsWhiteDoll

“I’m marrying him Mother. You can’t stop me.”

“Sure, he’s a little cold, but he’s BIG and he’s green and he’s MINE!”

5 2 3 4

Just let her go, Emily D. H. [eye roll]

mawwiage

Snorer Junior

Check out these two morsels napping away in all that upholstered paisley sunbeam action.

3

Yeah we’re gonna naphance on that mofo:

Cocxu

Ellen L., did you arrange them like this? Are you trying to compete with Wegman or something?

Rules for Living

Rule 12: Breakfast tastes better when it’s color-coordinated.
Rule 41: Just let it ring.  They’ll call back.
Rule 77: Spoons are for losers.
And the all-important rule #1: If at all possible, be a ferret.

Because ferrets rule.

Pass the Ferret Flakes, Kate S.

Revenge Is a Dish Best Served With Puréed Squash and a Teething Biscuit

"So, you were going to pan-fry me in butter, were you?  Well, let’s see how you taste with some mashed ‘nanas, washed down with a sippy cup full of Juicy Juice, fuzzball!"

Gotta catch me first, Mister Can't-Roll-Over-Yet!

I see he’s already started on the tail, Alison G.

Should I wear the Disapproving pair today?

I like the super passive-aggressive saying on the slippers. Makes me want to skip around in them.

Slippers

Awesome buns Babs & King and slippers from Sender-Inner Joyce W.

Decisions, Decisions…

("Let me think… Pan-fried in butter, with shallots and garlic?  No, I need to watch the cholesterol… Grilled, perhaps, with a lemon, pepper and herb rubbing?  Mmm, probably too stringy for that… Well, there’s always the crock-pot…")

Yes, folks, it's a baby. Remain calm, breathe normally ...

You didn’t see this post, Dan K. It never happened.

Little Bo Peep Gets Pwned

LBP:  HAI GUISE!  im LilBoPeep and im lukin 4 my sheep.  U d00dz seen sheep?
Dog1: ZOMG no wai I havnt seen ur stoopid sheep
Dog2: Baaaaaaaa GTFO n00b!
LBP:  whatevs, l8r lusers

You owe me, pal.

Took me a second to spot it, Paige K.

[This morning's post brought to you by chat rooms, texting, the violent death of all civilized language, and by the number 1337... - Ed.]