Captain Ameripup!

Yes, kids, it’s Captain Ameripup! That dashing doggie defender of decency!

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… and his loyal sidekick, Dorky!

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Hello, I’m Your Substitute Dog

Good morning, assorted trespassers and ruffians. My name is Mrs. Flapnacht, and I’ll be guarding the house today. Now, just because the regular dog is out sick, that doesn’t mean you can march in here and take things! I am every bit as vicious as she is! I’ve got massive fangs, and razor-sharp claws two inches long, and… all right, who am I kidding here, the flat-screen TV’s just down the hall, help yourself.

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Via Gerry Thomasen.

What Gave Me Away?

I don’t understand it. I crept in all quiet-like — y’know, little cat feet and all that — found what seemed like the perfect hiding place, and yet they spotted me right away! Where did I go wrong?

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Via Peter Rowley.

Hey, Are You Guys Cats, Too?

I was just saying to myself (awm nawm nawm), I wonder where all the other cats are? (crunch, munch) And here we are, just us cats! (slurp, smack) So whatcha guys doing? Cat stuff, am I right? (burp) You know I love it!

Rear Window II

In this long-awaited sequel, professional furtographer “Mutt” Muffries becomes suspicious of a neighbor Rottweiler burying an unusually large amount of bones in his backyard.

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Via La Guisla amagada.

Oh, You Shouldn’t Have

I even appreciate how you sewed my name onto them, but I’m still not wearing them.

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Via Alison Benbow.

License and Registration, Please

“Sir, I pulled you over for doing 70 yards in a 55-yard-per-hour zone. (sniff, sniff) Is that illegal catnip I smell, sir? I’m going to have to ask you to open the back of the van, sir…”

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Here is Bruno with one of my two model Zuk vans,” says Flickr-er Trevor.

I Just Feel So… Drained

I’m just limp as a noodle. Every day on the colander feels strainer and strainer. Oh well, I’ll just pasta time away here.

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Via Russell Bernice.

The Meowchant of Venice

Hath not a Mew eyes? Hath not a Mew paws, organs, dimensions, senses, affections, whiskers? If you prick us, do we not whap? If you tickle us, do we not look annoyed? If you… actually, this is all just a roundabout way of asking: Are we having ham for dinner?

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Transcendental Observation

Looking for greater personal power over your life? Then call Werner Gufinov, the world’s only out-of-body life coach! Werner’s unique coaching methods let you see yourself as you really are — and if that doesn’t inspire you to straighten up and take control over your life, then nothing will!

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“This is Bentley with his arm around Batman, seemingly conspiring with him against Violet down the stairs,” says Christine.

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