Posts tagged as: I shall leeck you

Laundry Mountain Blues

September 20, 2009 By

[blues licks, y'all] Dah dwee da dump.

I woke up this mornin’ (dah dwee da dump)
And went back to sleep (dah dwee da dump)
Cause starin’ right at me (dah dwee da dump)
This big wrinkled heap (dah dweedle da dump) (etc.)

Twenty tan and black towels
Just a pile o’ wet fuzz
One little pink sock
Told me right where I was…

pug_melt

I’m in the washroom, baby (back in the washroom, baby)
I’m in the washroom, baby (back in the washroom, baby)
I’m in the washroom, baby, face down on the flo’
(dah dwee da dump, dah dweedle a dump, dah dwee-aah)
And Miss Miranda H. Mama…
(all stop for a four-count)
…She don’t need me no mo’

[harmonica outro, repeat chorus, big finish]

128 comments

Um, Why Is My Lunch Eating My Lunch?

September 18, 2009 By

In an amazing series of photos, a fearless rat stared down a mighty leopard–and the leopard blinked.  While the puzzled cat sniffed and watched, the rat helped itself to the leopard’s steak dinner.  Be sure to read the full story at the Mail Online.

image001

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COXCU 2

I’ve had nightmares like this before, John L. (I’m always the leopard.)

134 comments

Oh, Red-and-White Stripey Object…

September 2, 2009 By

…thank you for being my soulmate. Before you entered my life, I’d tried them all: Round jingling thing that hides under the sofa, pink squeaking porcine animal replica, black clacking object that joins papers at one corner (actually, you really want to keep your tongue away from those things)…

Avalanche Loves Catnip

But they just don’t understand me the way you do, my diagonally alternating friend.  And that’s why this time it’s — dare I say it? — really love.  I love you more than any cat’s ever loved a hastily-manufactured red-and-white stripey cloth bag.

catnip_toy_licking_closeup

That’s some serious sandpaper on that tongue, Nancy H.

109 comments

Your Guide to Evil Marketing

September 1, 2009 By

Lesson Twelve: When confronted with a truly challenging sales assignment, such as a Ponzi scheme, or cans of chemical-laced swill, the savvy marketer will reach for his secret weapon: The cute puppy.

chloe

Simply by placing a cute puppy in your advertisement, you will reduce the brains of your readers to a quivering puddle of Tapioca, rendering them helpless to your diabolical suggestions.

chloe2

Musssssst … haaaave … Pepsi, … Amber S.

56 comments

I love, I love my calendar squirrel

August 31, 2009 By

You must have eet!!!

I love, I love my calendar squirrel
Yeah, sweet calendar squirrel
I love, I love, I love my calendar squirrel
Each and every day of the year.

It's no rocket pop but it will do.

Cute Overload Page-a-Day and Wall calendars NOW AVAILBUHLS. Licking Squirrelio Iglesias sent in by Zarina M. Lyrics are a blatant rip-off of ‘Calendar Girl’ by Mr. Neeeeeeeeeeeeeil Sedaka!

43 comments

I shall leek/nom you

August 15, 2009 By

It’s hardly my fault, you’re just scrumptious! [Forehead nibblage]

THAT is a thorough forehead cleaning, Ava, Nibbles and Sender-Inner Don A.

64 comments

Ready for his Xtreme Close-Up

August 11, 2009 By

Pup “Brody” is ready for his close-up.

He powdered his schnozzle and everything. Check it: [roll music]

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Brian V. has many, many more glorious shots over at Flickr-oonie-poonie

77 comments

Incoming leeckings!

August 4, 2009 By

DUCK AND…

Puppy00Puppy01Puppy02

COVER!

Puppy03

I barely survived, Vicki P.! [wiping brow]

42 comments

I’m suuuuuure this is what Carly Simon er, Abe Vigoda had in mind

July 26, 2009 By

…when she he wrote this song.  For the Captain and Tennille.  Seriously.  I bet you did not know that.

A Great Dane Lick-a-thon.

Eye roll, Jamie M.!

67 comments

The Oook of Love Is In Your Eyes

July 23, 2009 By
‘Allo, bah-bee… Do not be afraid, mah darleeng. Zis love, she ees beeger zan zee both of us… First, you must cleek zee button to begeen zee make-out muzeek, an’ zen we commence wees zee making of zee out, non?

53 comments

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