Know Your Mythical Forest Creatures

When traveling the frozen woods of Norway, beware of Trekronhjort, the mythical three-headed stag. According to legend, Trekronhjort will grant a wish to anyone who encounters it; a remarkable 97 percent of the time, that wish is “please don’t rip me to pieces with your antlers.”

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Via Reddit.

Percy Pibble, Canine Superstar!

After his sold-out appearance at the Meadowlands, Percy greets a herd of his adoring fans, who are udderly excited to meet him.

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Via Mermaid Melissa.

Whatever Floats Your Goat

Friends, in farms everywhere, a silent tragedy unfolds: baby goats born with legs too short to reach the ground. For the innocents burdened with this mysterious affliction, life is an everyday struggle. Moving from place to place, even the joyful act of leaping in the air, are impossible dreams. But there is hope. With research, we can bring them down to earth and into normal lives. Please send your contribution, no matter how large, to: The I’ll Believe Anything Foundation, Box 57, Cayman Islands.

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Via the karma-finding Adam Rifkin.

Meanwhile, at the Lost and Found Desk at Alpha Centauri Intergalactic Spaceport…

“Um, excusing of me, but have any life forms located a small metal briefcase? Slate grey, black handle, glowing a little bit and making a humming noise, with tentacles? It’s really important that I get that back.”

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“This guy is oddly cute,” notes Redditor jamieinthenorthwest.

Meanwhile, at the Ernst Fleetman Institution for the Study of Uncontrollable Sprinting…

“SoBeckyandGailfromAccountingaskedaboutyoulastweekand (huff, puff) Itoldthemyouweredoingmuchbetterandthatyou’dprobablybe (huff, puff) outinaweekortwobutfranklyIdon’tseeanynoticablechangein (huff, puff) yourconditionAreyoutakingthosepillsthedoctorgaveyou? (huff, puff)”

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Meanwhile, at Yuck-a-Bucks Comedy Club…

Hey it’s great to be here you’re a lovely audience but last night was a tough crowd lemmie tellya So many guys in camouflage I thought the place was empty I says I know you’re out there I can hear you reloading Don’t get me wrong I love my wife but I wish she’d stop hanging her pantyhose on my antlers am I right fellas But I can’t complain at least I get good TV reception…

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“You’d be smiling too, if you just realized it was a camera being pointed at you and not a hunter with a gun,” notes photog Jamie McCaffrey.

I Hope You Realize This Means War

For agonizing, eternal minutes, she and the interloper merely stared at one another, each afraid to move or speak. At last, the visitor found his courage, stepped forward, and offered the traditional greeting of his people:

“PPPTHHHHHTHTHBBBTHHHTHHHHHPPPPPPPTH!”

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“This is Popcorn the Cat facing off one of the many Cincinnati city deer that wondered into my neighbor’s yard. I like to think she was protecting our garden,” says Tawny W.

Larry Gets Buffaloed

“Are you gonna let that ram over there blow his own horn like he owns the place? Who does that conch-head think he is?”

“Yeah! I dare ya to challenge that petting-zoo inmate to a head-butting contest! That’ll show him!”

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Spring Fling

Thees weell make you so happy you weell theenk eet ees spreeng(-like)!

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Cutest Paw lambykins.
More sweet little dairy cows from Kimberly P.
Edgar’s Mission piggeh!

Migrant Office Workers

My people are a proud people. We do not want your pity. Wherever there is work, we will go. Last week, I learn of a job collating documents for a big law firm. When I arrive, there are hundreds of us hoping to be chosen. It is a hard life. But I do not complain. As long as I have my desk and my pack mule Annabelle, I will get by.


Via BuzzFeed.

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