Hoverhog flies over this great land, searching for toilet paper tubes WITH HIS BEADY EYES OMG

Mr T’s hedgehog by phrenophile.

Snug as a Bug in a…Thistle.

Each night, Snuffles asked to be tucked in – something that required a constant supply of Band-Aids.

What a protective sleeping bag, Heather L.

Tweed, Now with More Prickly

Before slipping on those blazers, always remember to check the sleeves for foreign bodies.

Don’t hedge your bets, Zac T.

Don’t Play With Your Food

Listen to me, my tasty minions! You are my Tator Tot Army, and together we’ll rid the kitchen of Colonel Ketchup!

That’s quite a surname, Cocoa Will-Never-Reveal-Her-Last-Name.

Hedgehog: It’s What’s for Dinner

Oh sure, every time we show you a baby bunny, or a cute kitteh, you people are all like “Squeee!  Ah wawna pop heem in mah mouf!”  Well, bon appétit, kiddies!  (On the plus side, you won’t need a toothpick after dinner.)

What wine goes with hedgehog, Brittany H.?


Smithers, it seems that while sunning myself on this giant orange rind, my limbs dehydrated again.

Get me my B12 shot before these ninnies mistake me for an urchin and throw me out to sea.

♪ He may be called Toothpick, but he’ll always be Monty, to me ♪ (with apologies to Billy Joel), Jean T.

Dear Dr. Lipschwitz…

Please help. His name is Wedge – purely coincidental, mind you – and he’s gone ’round the bend:

“Hey, guys! Look in my new tele-ma-scope! We live in Pennsyl-ma-vania, but you can see all the way to Polka-vank-tatum! And that’s where the Paperclip Fairies and Purple live!”

What the hell just went on here, Tara G.?

‘Tis The Season…For Close Inspection

Cute Overload Holiday Tip: The holidays are a traditional time for many and often include roasting chestnuts on an open fire.  But, “chestnuts” are a prickly bunch, so always be sure to first check for blemishes – and disgruntled squeaks…

Beatriz P., Fa-la-la-la-laaa-la-la-la-laaa – Namaste!

Half-Caf Quad Misto Macchiato Con Quills

Oh, and please add a moist nosicle.


Sender-Inner Mandy says that her hedge “Cronie” crawls into cups sometimes. Then, Cronie gets served to the highest bidder.

Taking One for the Team

Herbert recently lost his job as the household doorstop, so when The Dog offered him the opportunity, he couldn’t turn it down. You see, The Cat had recently upped his efforts to sabotage The Dog; and he suspected his Kibble was being poisoned in an attempt to be dethroned as man’s best friend. Frankly, Herbert felt bad for him, because let’s face it, The Dog was not the sharpest knife in the drawer.

Maybe you can help me, crack-on-the-kitchen-floor. There seems to be a pin cushion in my dinner....

Listen, Dog, I agreed to test your food, but do you have to hover over me like some kind drooly sweater?

I knew I shouldn't have had that third Bartles&James wine cooler.

I’m putting my neck on the line for you, the least you could’ve done was supply a step ladder.

Here's how it's gonna go - I'm going to eat every single one of you. Prepare for greatness. R.I.P., Kibble.

I’m going to be honest with you: this crap you call food is so disgusting that I wouldn’t know if it was poisoned or not. Here’s an idea, maybe stop being so eager to please everyone and demand a real meal.

You mind?

Take one step closer to me, Dog, and I’ll go straight to The Cat and tell him that you want to replace his kitty litter with Pop Rocks Candy.

Good luck with this situation, Kristin B.


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