I Ain’t Going Nowhere Until She Uses the Crevice Attachment

FACT: Unsightly cat hair can damage delicate and expensive computer equipment. Protect your investment with the CuteCo CatVac 3000™! (Note: For stubborn build-up, ask the cat hair to get up and leave first.)

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I Got It… I Got It… I Got It…

… um, I don’t got it.

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Oh Swell, Now I’ll Need to Bring Back $5,000 Worth of Cat Food

This happens every time I take a road trip. Before I leave, I run down a mental list: Front door locked, check. Key with neighbor, check. Lights off, check. Plants watered, check. And then I’ll be halfway to where I’m going before I realize: I forgot to turn off the kitten replicator!

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Crash Test Cuties

Here at CuteLabs, our researchers work tirelessly to make kittens safer and more durable. In this slow-motion crash test, we see the benefits of CuteLabs’ patented BellehBuffer™ technology in helping these kittens survive a head-on collision.

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Will it Go ‘Round in Circles?

If I could turn back time, I’d get back off this spinning wheel, right back where we started from. But there’s no lookin’ back; it’s too late to turn back now. I can’t return to sender ’cause that’s the point of no return!

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We Boop Because We, Um, Something that Means “Care” but Rhymes with “Boop”

Always at the forefront of the zenith of the cutting edge of cuteness research, CuteLabs once again demonstrates its commitment to animal understanding with the development of the Bidirectional Olfactive Oscillation Pod (BOOP), engineered to precisely measure the maximum threshold of kitten nose-touching. CuteLabs: Building Safer Felines of Tomorrow… Today!

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I Just Can’t Stop Eating These Things!

Every time I finish one, I want to have an otter, and an otter, and an otter!

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New Species Discovered: “Caturtle”

Cuteologists are cheering the discovery of the “caturtle,” a feline/reptilian hybrid equipped with a tough outer shell and a fuzzy inner body.

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Shufflekitten!

Oh sure, every cruise ship has shuffleboard, but only the proshest ships have shufflekitten. (Scoring can be a bit tricky, because your puck won’t keep still.)

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The C.O. Guide to Cat-proofing Your Home

Cats are naturally curious animals, and will naturally view any closed door as a challenge. For added security, place a pan of water in front of the…

… oh, never mind.

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