What a Boring Party

Everybody’s just standing around, nobody talking to one another, nobody talking to me… I know I can be a little prickly sometimes, but not like these guys! Sheesh!

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Oh, This Is My Favorite Part!

This is the part where Bethany reveals her pregnancy to Reginald moments before he leaves with his Space Marine platoon to defeat the two-headed mutant dinosaurs before they can break through the quantum time portal and eat Bethany’s parents, causing her to not exist!

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Rubbing Me the Wrong Way?

What a comically alien concept. There is no wrong way. Now, continue, slave…

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I’m Making My Own Costume!

Sheesh, every costume for kitties is “sexy” this and “sexy” that! This year the hot costume is “Sexy Ebola Nurse,” for Pete’s sake! Guess I’m rolling my own!

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Science Run Amok!

Science ethicists have raised concerns about the project known as the Large Corgion Collider, noting that a mishap could open a quantum tunnel into a parallel universe ruled by corgis.

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Rock On, Turtle Dude!

When they were home alone, Biff and Leroy would often while away many an hour headbanging to “Bohemian Rhapsody.”

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Meanwhile, at the Ernst Fleetman Institution for the Study of Uncontrollable Sprinting…

“SoBeckyandGailfromAccountingaskedaboutyoulastweekand (huff, puff) Itoldthemyouweredoingmuchbetterandthatyou’dprobablybe (huff, puff) outinaweekortwobutfranklyIdon’tseeanynoticablechangein (huff, puff) yourconditionAreyoutakingthosepillsthedoctorgaveyou? (huff, puff)”

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Oh, You Are Getting a Flu Shot

It’s just a question of what sort of pointy object you’d like jabbed into you.

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Sandwich? What Sandwich?

I had no idea you were eating a sandwich. I’m just standing here, mentally cataloging my squeaky toys, and totes not even caring that you’re eating a moist, filling, savory sandwich. Pinky swear.

Via Vine.

You’re Pulling My Leg!

No, really — you’re pulling my leg! Staaaaaaaaahhhhhhhp!

bFy0zbe

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