To: All Employees
From: CuteLabs Security
Due to recent breaches of cuteness protocol, all doors have been upgraded with Rapacity Inhibiting Boundary Inquiry Technology (RIBIT) locks. To gain entry, employees must: 1. Touch key card to panel; 2. Answer random security question posed by RIBIT GuardFrog; 3. Kiss RIBIT GuardFrog to enable DNA matching. Please report sudden transformations to First Aid.