Adorable Baby Otter in Need of Serious Attitude Adjustment

This towel is too scratchy, and these lights are too bright! Have I mentioned that I hate when people stare?

Listen man, I’m gonna tell you one last time – I don’t know anyone named “Emmet”, and if you continue to stand here, you’re gonna get some pureed sardines thrown at your ugly mug.

Patricia S. says that Elaine and Leroy, two North American River Otters, just had the above baby at Binghamton Zoo. Photo by Lexy Roberts.

This Just In: Fake ‘Brows for Birds

I don’t know…I feel like I’m walking a fine line between street thug who’s about to steal your seed and mysterious hunk who asks you to join him for a nightcap.

Also makes for a fine fake mustache for hamsters, Sayaka C.

Tough Fluff

Gah head, make an “I love shredding chicken” joke. I dare you.

Say, didn’t he play Bull on “Night Court”, Sara K.?

Her Little Helper was a Bit of an Alarmist

Whoa lady, if you’re about to do what I think you’re about to do, then I can tell you with complete certainty that things will never be the same. You’re about to ruin everything, and I’m sorry, but I absolutely cannot allow you to put that wooden cutting board through the dishwasher.

I thought Palmolive was green, Larissa M.

Now we’ll have to disapprove of ourselves

A moment of disdainful silence, please: Derby, the official face of disapproval and founding member of the Legion of Evil, has committed his final and most sweeping act of condemnation by passing on to Completely Unacceptable Bunny Heaven.

In his dishonor, Derby’s owners Carly & Art have disassembled this loving tribute image (click to view at Flickr). We’re sure Derby would have disapproved.

[Just a gentle reminder, tho -- Derby and Cinnamon are not the same rabbit! - Ed.]

Not Everyone is Thrilled About Patagonia’s New Line

If I hear one more time that I look like your father-in-law, I’ll pee on your leg.

He’s looking sheepish, Jeremy D.

Man, That Cadbury Bunny is Difficult to Work With

Hey buddy, how hard is it to press your little finger down on the camera’s little button?

This is ridiculous that I have to pose for so long! Don’t you know who I am??? Would you treat the Energizer Bunny like this???

Dammit, Xavier, get me my driver – I’m going back to Malibu!

He’s an angry bunny, Jessica C.

Consider This Your First and Last Warning

Listen, we don’t want no trouble – today we’re just a basket of puppies, capiche? But next time you pretend to throw that tennis ball and make us look like fools for running after nothing? We ain’t gonna be so forgiving.

They also don’t like baths, so step lightly, Traci H.

New Guy, Meet Wild-Eyed Crazy Ginny

Ginny moonlights as a stalker who challenges her victims to terrifyingly freaky staring contests.

In Ginny’s defense, nobody likes change – especially when the new model looks like Nermal, Dan R.

Baird Hated Delivering to Pearl’s House.

Have mercy, does your employer know that this is how you’re representing his business?! Is your Mama aware that this is how you’re leaving her house?! No, your Mama’s a nice lady; I bet you pulled the wool over her eyes…and then stole her dang ki-mo-no!

Kids these days, can’t even be bothered to spuce-up before they fly…

The irony is Pearl’s probably dressed in a shower cap, flowered robe, and tennis shoes, Victoria M.

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