I Can’t Get Comfortabuhls!

I know you mean well, Gravity, but I really want to sleep this way! So cut it out!

Oof! Grr! Yay, I Did It!

Oh, sure — you and I go up and down steps all the time. But when you’re a chubby padded puppy, it’s a major milestone in life.

Hello.

My name is Roxie. I will be your puppy today.


It has been our pleasure to serve you, Desiree.

So How Do You Work These Things?

Is there, like, a manual or something? ‘Cause I’ve kind of got the front ones figured out, but the back ones… Well, they are supposed to be pointing down, aren’t they?

The Downside to Dieting

Proof that every silver lining has a dark cloud: You count your calories, work out religiously, drop that weight and feel great — and your skin doesn’t fit anymore.

Betty is chub-tastic, Natasha H.

The Doctor is In

I don’t know, doc – it’s just a feeling of malaise, I guess.

My walks are sluggish, my fetching is mediocre, and I couldn’t care less that the cat keeps blaming me for his “accidents”. I dunno – can you help me, doc?

Um, how is telling me to eat some mango and then charging me $450 for the 15 minutes I’ve been here, helping me, doc?

That doctor is going to find an accident under his couch, that’s for sure, Dax L.

Holiday pupcakes are almost done

Der teh der. Will juuuuust take a moment.

Ding! Tanguera, they’re…ready?

Dainty, She Ain’t

When she wasn’t driving her rig, Bertha liked to let it all hang out and relax. Not surprisingly, her roommate, Prudence, wasn’t around much.

What a lady, Charlotte D.

Strained Carrots? My Favorite!

(Man, this is the sweetest babysitting gig ever.  The kid smears the food on his face, and I get to lick it off.  I hope he managed to get some dessert on the other side.)

That’s got to be the cleanest baby in history, Samantha M.

Every Thanksgiving, It’s the Same Thing

Aunt Leticia drinks all the cooking sherry, Grandpa and Cousin Harold argue politics, Cousin Wendell tells us about the latest cult he just joined, and I get stuck babysitting Aunt Brunhilde’s kids, Rollo and Yappo.  That’s it, man; I’m outta here.

Just read this leaflet, Marilyn T. — it’ll totally change your life.