(The following has been typed in Overact-O-Vision™, which will cause you to hear it in the Emperor’s voice from “Return of the Jedi.” Discontinue use if you experience dizziness, tingling in extremities, or urge to chew scenery.)
Goooood, my young apprentice. I can feel the “squee” swelling within you now. With each passing moment you make yourself more my servant.
I am defenseless. Take your Jedi weapon. Strike me down with all of your redonkulousness and your journey towards the cute side will be complete!
From Animals With Lightsabers, found by Bill S.






















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