The Firefox Stream

Today, Mozilla announced a live “firefox” stream–24-hours of two red panda cubs at The Knoxville Zoo. You can submit a panda name and help them earn treats. [head tilt]

Sender-Inner Shannon says you can learn more here!

Saturday Night Schnozzle

Koalas really own the Schnozzular space. Seriously, who else has a schnozzle like that? Answer? No other animal! Koalas are mayors of Schnozzleville:

So Dad, when can I go surfing?

Schnozzular and Koalular by Photopakismo!

Thhhhhhfffffbbbbt!

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down, and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun, and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, “Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter, and you didn’t even pay for your sandwich!”

“Hey, man, I’m a PANDA!” the panda shouts back. “Look it up!”

The manager opens his dictionary and reads:

Panda: A tree-dwelling marsupial of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves.

(Red?!) Panda joke by Anil Dash. Red panda by Curt.

Dancin’ Machine!

Even pandas can’t resist doin’ a little chair dance at the office once and a while. Here’s some lucky video of Party Panda doin’ a little scratch mixing.

Cooler than the Average Bear

Ah, time for some more fun in the snow. Bonus Envy Factor: This video was shot just two weeks ago, in British Columbia, according to the video notes. (Meanwhile, you moved your bed under the air conditioner again this year, didn’t you?)

Posted to our Twitter feed by Dawn. Thanks, Dawn!

The Story of the Hungry Feroshus Bear

By Jeffery Osterblaargh, Mrs. McNulty’s Sekond Grade

Ok so this is astory about the time that I ate a humin bean all by myself. Wun day I was hungry. And there was this humin bean walking down the street.

And so I desided to eat him for dinner. Because I am a feroshus pradider pridit eating bear and because everybody is skeerd of me because I am so mean.

The humin bean was skeerd. He tried to get away but I was to big and strong for him. He cried and cried for help, but I dint listen because I was so hungry.

And he was so delishus that next I ate a whole busload of first graders, and then I ate a kangaroo, and my piano teacher, and Batman, and some ice cream, and…

I hear that special school’s really nice, Maggie S.

Lotso Tree-Huggin’ Bear

SWITZERLAND — Police and protesters clashed during the Ursine Environment Summit today, as demonstrators upset over deforestation of the Hundred Acre Wood chained themselves to treetops and had to be forcibly removed.

Cub reporter Jorden C. contributed to this article.

Please stand by

People, we apologize for the delay in getting you your cute fix over the last 36 hours. [Tapping arm repeatedly] We had some hamsters clog the design template and chew through various HTML tags, resulting in white-as-snow blank screens. Of death!

And we’re baaaaaaaaaack.

Breaking News: Red Panda Birf

According to the WashPo, The National Zoo has the first-born Red Panda cub at the zoo in over a decade.

Nork!!! [The sound I just made looking at this Cute Overload Xtreme Red Pandy Close-up]

The C.O. Guide to Etiquette

Part Three: The handshake is the key to any successful introduction. Always grasp the hand firmly, and shake from the elbow, pumping about three or four times. A two-handed grip is too familiar for most business and social situations.

Regardless of species, a bear hug is considered inappropriate for an initial greeting.

Photo: Alan Vernon

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