Oh Yah, You Betcha! (wink!)

"… and in my travels, it’s been such a genuine thrill and honor to meet so many of you hard-working, down-to-earth, honest-to-Betsy, meat-and-potatoes, tough-as-nails folks, what I like to call the ‘real dogs’ that form the best part of this great country of ours.

"Why, over there, I can see Carl the Car-Chaser, and there’s Fred the Frisbee-Catcher, and Bob the Barker, and Steve the Snorgler, and Larry the Leg-Lover, and Ned the Napper, and Ted the Toilet-Drinker-Outer-Ofer …"

And golly, I'm just gunna miss alla ya so darn much!

Just six more days, Melissa F. the Sender-Inner …

Dr. Fluffy’s Cathouse of Horror!

NOW THROUGH OCTOBER 31, Dogtopolis Jaycees present the 17th annual Dr. Fluffy’s Cathouse of Horror!  Enter — if you dare — and witness scenes so gruesome, you’ll leave with your tail tucked between your legs!

SEE!!!  The terrifying Terrier-Eating Toilet in … THE BATHROOM OF BLOOD!!!

AKA the Venus FLY-trap (thank you, I'll be here all week)

SEE!!!  Hideous mutant experiments in … FELIX’S LABORATORY OF NIGHTMARES!!!

Help meeeeeee ... Help meeeeeeeeeeee ...

And your tail will tremble with terror when you come face to face with … SATAN HIMSELF!!!

But you can call me Toby; we try to keep things informal here...

The Dogtopolis Jaycees thank Chelsee I., Hans L., and Dan K. for their help with this year’s production.

‘Tocktober Surprise!

Step 1: Drill hole in ice.
Step 2: Cover hole lightly.
Step 3: Wait for fox to show up.

Step 4: SURPRISE!!

Kinda looks like a cigarette butt with legs, Donna B.

And Now, Here’s Every Episode of Lassie Ever Made

"Whoa there, Lassie!  Why the big hurry?"

(Insert 'screeching tires' sound effect here)

"What’s that you say, girl?  Timmy’s fallen down a well?  And he’s broken both legs?  And he’s surrounded by poisonous snakes?!  And he’s sinking into quicksand?!?  And he’s down to three percent power on his iPod?!?!"

(Insert 'whimpering collie' sound effect here)

"I’m coming, Timmy!! I shall accomplish a daring and heroic rescue in my own particular idiom!"

(Insert 'Hanna-Barbera running' sound effect here)

Let’s hope the idiom doesn’t require any heavy lifting, Kira G.

Turtle ‘Tock Fa-shons!

Flirty Shell Skirts are in this Winter, Laaaaadies!



The aptly-named photo tortoisetock, by the aptly-named Sugarbunzz.

Happy Taaaaails to Yoooouuu…

Well, friends, I see by the calendar on the wall that another ‘Tocktober is nearly behind us.  And so, as we tuck our tired tushes in bed for another year, we bid you a fond butt-bye — from the bottom of our hearts.

Maybe next year we can have Oct-TOE-ber.

‘Til we meet again, Stephanie C.

A Tentative Lucy Sniffs Out the Calendar

Hmmmm… [sniff sniff, tentative paw touch]

Attfd

Hmmmm [pat pat…]

Attfe

Hmmmm [feels paper quality] OK. I approve.

Attff

All the best to you, Mathijs V. and thank you for being a part of the 2009 calendar, Lucy of HamsterTracker fame!

Pup saves kittens from fire!

Most peeps would push others out the way during a fire, but not this pup. He stayed behind to make sure the kittens trapped inside got out safely.

Jump over to Yahoo!/AP to see the story.

Puppulence

Picture_25

Thanks to all the rubberneckers who sent this one in, especially Berthaservant!

The 7 Types of Pet Costumes

First, let’s get one thing straight. Pets hate costumes.

I DON’T CARE IF YOU THINK YOUR DOG LOVES IT when you strap a Cowboy Barbie on his back, or YOUR KITTEH APPEARS TO ENJOY WEARING A PRINCESS TIARA. Someone needs to tell you, and it might as well be Cute Overload. Your pet pretty much hates it.

When we dress our pets up, it’s for our own selfish enjoyment. So you might as well DO A STELLAR JOB, because your pet only benefits from a costume if that costume generates gobs of attention.

You owe your pet a damn good costume. Which brings me to the point. A LOT of you are SLACKING and/or CONFUSED out there. Think of the ANIMALS. Let me show you what’s what. [Beckoning motion] First we have:

1. The Famous Human Costume

The Good: You always have to explain it. "He has a mini mohawk! He’s Mr. T., SEE!?"
The Bad: Your pet still hates you if you don’t step it up to make it recognizable

Exhibit A: Mr. T:

Mla00060556

And a well-crafted Martha:

Mla00058055

2. The Cutesy Hurl-a-Thon

The Good: You’ll get a lot of "Awn, he looks adorable!" from other insane people
The Bad: Anne Geddes will come after you with enormous hedge clippers

Behold Bunny in a Lettuce Cup:

Mla00060454

3. The Non Sequitur Costume

The Good: Often very well-crafted. Drugs and/or heavy wine use is almost always associated with each costume idea.
The Bad: Lots of WTF?…OK! reactions.

The "BoomBox":

Mla00060160

The "Mix Tape":

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The "Buttered Pupcorn":

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The "Rice Krispy Treat":

Win_ricekrispietreat

The "Ham":

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The "Metro Line"!?!?!?!

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4. The "I Had it Lying Around" Costume

The Good: You finally clean up the house
The Bad: Your cat continues to hate you

There’s the Boxed Wine Kitteh Leaf Thing:

Mla00060107

And Aluminum Foil/Rubber Band Turtle ‘Jaws';

Scary

5. The "My-pet-is-going-to-kill me-but-I’m-doing-it-anyway" Costume

The Good: Target Dog Costume Sales reach all-time high thanks to you
The Bad: Your pet kills you.

Mla00060395

Nah, don’t take the tag off. What’s the point?

Mla00060041

5. Build on Your Strengths Costume

The Good: A costume that takes advantage of and accentuates a particular pet attribute
The Bad: Your pet’s "attribute" is on display (the fact he looks like a pimp cannot be helpful)

Behold the Golden Retriever Lion:

Mla00057181

The Built-in Ewok Face:

Mla00059297

The Fish in a Bowl that Happens to look like a Jack-o-Lantern:

Mla00058296

The Cow-Spotted terrier:

Mla00058297

The Suave Hedge:

Mla00056485

The Built-in Wetsuit:

Mla00056924

And the Dog that Happens to Look like a Pimp:

Mla00058014

6. The Epic Transformation Costume

The Good: The pinnacle of a great costume—creative! imaginative! inspiring! Transforming!
The Bad: Everyone else instantly feels like crap when they see your genius

Behold…Elvis:

Mla00060607

The Jumbo Dachshund Dog:

Mla00059745

The Wizard of Oz:

Mla00059712

The Croc Versus Pup: (more photos here)

Funnydogcostume1

The Fast Food Gang [Making gang doughnut symbol with hand]:

Halloweenies

The Thanksgiving Turkey Decision: (That thought bubble is actually part of the costume):

Mla00059312

And, our current favorite, the Headless Horseman:

Mla00057867

7. The Just Plain Wrong Costume

Don’t worry if costume types 1 through 6 don’t encourage you. There is always type 7; just plain wrong. When in doubt, you can always create fake cleavage for your Boxer.

Mla00057392_2Mla00057391

Huge thanks to all Sender-Inners over at the Martha Stewart/CuteOverload Costume Contest. Keep those submissions coming!

In no particular order: Oswald the Pug by kheilbrunn, The BoomBox and Mix Tape by lawlerc, Vino Paws by lvmyboys3, Elvis pup by sashimi54, Cat that’s gonna kill by pastryprncess, hot dog vendor by StephanieJaxBeach, Oz by hrlollar Thanksgiving Decision by newfy, Ewok by raindropSJ, Cow by Breehan, Pumpkin Fish Tankie by piebispro, Martha Stewart Magazine by soulofart, Buttered Pupcorn by poc2u, Bulldog Pimpin’ by cknlomein, Headless Horseman by newfy, Boxer St. Pauli Girl by hobie_utah Ham Dog by PaleBlue, Retreiver Lion by JeanninePC99, Terrier Scuba Diver by herrinkr and James Bond Hedgehog by jacqtav.

Lawdy, Was That Me?!

So sorry, y’all, I had a touch of the vapors!  Must have eaten some bad shrimp or something!  Goodness gracious, ah’m turning braht ray-edd from embarrassment, ah do dee-clay-uhh!

(fans self while giggling nervously)

Just pretend it never happened, Melanie H.

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