Friday Haiku Limerick

There once were inseparable pals
One monkey and one little gal
They took strolls and made tea,
Were friendly as could be,
Now both species have evolved morale
-Meg

One toddler and one chimpanzee:
She showed him just how to pour tea.
He would not have maligned her,
But he had to remind her
“Hey kid, you’re descended from me!”
-Jessy

Said the Girl
Some things can not be
I’m afraid you can’t marry me
Your wrinkled and hairy
With manners quite lairy
besides you belong in a tree.
-Honorable Glad

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Barry Bland, Photographer for Barcroft. Now you try, Jane M.!

Hey! I come here to Cute Overload
For a kitten or blorpable toad
Orangs should be wild
Not at tea with a child
I will nuff now until I explode!
-Trabb’s Boy

This orangutan’s trying my patience.
I’m tired of his poor imitations
Of the way that I crawl
And my dear little doll,
And I abhor how he wastes my libations!
-Cath

Mr. Mucky McNufferson huffs
His bellicose cheek outward puffs
He raises his ire
With indignant fire
And says to the comments e-NUFF!

“I come to this site for the cute
Like a marmie asleep in a boot
Not a chimp with a kid,
Or, the heavens forbid,
The two of them sharing a snoot!”
-Berthaservant

Barnacles!

Baby barn swallows, or “barnacles” are fluffy, round, beaked creatures with tiny claws who encrust themselves firmly on to barn walls and fixtures. They squawk rhythmically to both attract their mother’s attention for food and to alert photographing cuteporters:

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Alert reader Keith W. spotted at these barnacles at Mercer Slough Barnacle Blueberry Farm in Bellevue, WA.

Sur-prise im-preg-nay-shons!

BunnyHuddleAccording to Sender-Inner Amanda, one of her bunnehs, “Mr. Morris” managed to impregnate a female bunneh (name withheld) the day before he was fixed. Way to GO Mr. Morris!

Luckily the babies were all “pretty darn cute.” Yay!

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Send your (non human) surprise impregnation story in tuhday! [cross-eyed head tilt]

Paw Bouquets

[Martha Stewart voice] “Last month, we showed you what all June brides are carrying.”

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“Now we’re back with more options. This Marmelade Paw Bouquet includes some Tailio Iglesias.”

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“The Tuxedo Paw Bouquet looks nice in a basket, with some Paw Pads showing.”

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“And for that extra zing, throw in a Toe Hawk. They also make great boutonnières.”

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Fabulous, Sarah. Fierce, Julia G. Tranny Mess, Diva Kitty. Work it out, Little Miao.

Mr. Schnozzle McWhiskers asks;

“How are you staying cool this summer?” (Besides playing Dog or Otter)

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Photo by Matt Marriott, courtesy of Busch Gardens in Tampa Bay, Florida.

Scenes From Yesterday’s Coronation

It was a day of grandeur and majesty as Cutesylvania’s ruling elite turned out to watch King Ace XVII ¼ ascend the throne.  We now have exclusive photos of the royals as they enjoy the glittering excitement of this once-in-a-lifetime event…

And first, here’s Princess Gertrude Hortense Von Mississippi-Two-Mississippi, looking absolutely giddy in her tiara made entirely out of used dental fillings…

Is my face on crooked?

Next, Prince Poundcake Mellon III, Dodgers VI, eagerly awaits the King’s arrival…

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And here we see Prince Oreo Keebler-Pepperidge, Earl of Hydrox, as he watches the thrilling five-and-a-half hour ceremony in rapt attention…

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Our thanks to cuteporters T.U.M., Rachael C. and Julie F.

I’m canceling my subscription to Field & Stream

Can you believe this? I go to Field and Stream for Fishing, Hunting, Survival, AND Guns! GUNS!

Now, the world’s leading Outdoor Website Field & Stream is wondering if these fawns are TOO CUTE for their website. See for yourself.

MAYBE if they had tiny fawn-sized rifles, it’d be OK.

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The answer? If traffic is any judge, they should continue the trend. Many more photos to fawn over at their gallery here via “Fly Talk” blogger Tim Romano.

Send snacks immediately!

S.O.S.! S.O.S. I say!

Bee boo boo bee boo boo boo! [telegraph sound]

WHY is NO ONE sending snacks Amy W. & Justin R.!?!?!

California Blorpin’

All the seals are brown
And the pebbles grey
I’ve been for a swim
In this man made bay

I’d be safe and warm
If I was in L.A.
California blorpin’
Stuck in Germanaaaay

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A California sea lion at the Wuppertal Zoo in Germany dreams of going home. By Ina Fassbender. Spotted by Ryan with no last name.

Arise, King Kitten!

… and by the power vested in me by the kingdom of Cutesylvania, I hereby crown thee King Ace XVII ¼, Lord Sovereign of the Sandbox, Monarch of Mousies, First Heir to Choice Sunbeams, Divine Ruler of all…

Wait, something isn’t right here.  I think it’s the crown.  We need something that lends a certain gravitas befitting the dignity of this solemn occasion…

ACE

Oh, yeah.  That’s working for me.  Proceed.

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Can I be the Duke of URL, Diane V.?

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