Mabel and the Evil Penguin

When she was a little girl, Mabel Flossenglottner had an imaginary friend, a penguin she called Mr. Flappy.  She would run and play with him all day long, and share her most private thoughts.  In return, Mr. Flappy would tell Mabel to … do things.

tumblr_kpkz33kTLl1qzvcfgo1_400

Vintage Qte found by Lindsey J.  (With apologies to the little girl, who probably turned out just fine.)

Casting Call

We love the little critters when they’re scampering about — but sometimes they scamper straight into trouble.  Never fear, however; as Animals in Casts demonstrates, whatever doesn’t kill you makes you cuter:

CEL35WfTvquyduak7d8RMY3Zo1_1280

tumblr_koj0xdvYlk1qzcggro1_1280

2596858494_7f519245b8_o

Eastern-Grey-Kangaroo

CEL35WfTvnbg1o6npD9VI6S1o1_1280

Found by Jessica T.

Laundry Mountain Blues

[blues licks, y'all] Dah dwee da dump.

I woke up this mornin’ (dah dwee da dump)
And went back to sleep (dah dwee da dump)
Cause starin’ right at me (dah dwee da dump)
This big wrinkled heap (dah dweedle da dump) (etc.)

Twenty tan and black towels
Just a pile o’ wet fuzz
One little pink sock
Told me right where I was…

pug_melt

I’m in the washroom, baby (back in the washroom, baby)
I’m in the washroom, baby (back in the washroom, baby)
I’m in the washroom, baby, face down on the flo’
(dah dwee da dump, dah dweedle a dump, dah dwee-aah)
And Miss Miranda H. Mama…
(all stop for a four-count)
…She don’t need me no mo’

[harmonica outro, repeat chorus, big finish]

Tell ‘Em Flopsy Sent You

Don’t tell Hugh Hefner, but our friends the Japanese have revived the concept of the “bunny club.”  Only this time, the bunnies are real, and customers pay a fee to pet and fondle them — something you could never do at the old bunny clubs (and I have the restraining orders to prove it).

I’ll have the cottontail special with carrot juice, Kimber R.

Um, Why Is My Lunch Eating My Lunch?

In an amazing series of photos, a fearless rat stared down a mighty leopard–and the leopard blinked.  While the puzzled cat sniffed and watched, the rat helped itself to the leopard’s steak dinner.  Be sure to read the full story at the Mail Online.

image001

image003

COXCU 2

I’ve had nightmares like this before, John L. (I’m always the leopard.)

Friday Haiku: Sharing Is Caring

Share and share alike
Unalike? Share anyway
Now share your haiku

9-3-09 004

Thanks for sharing, Sheri B.

Homework is HARD!

I hate math

I hate sciences

I’m majoring in naps

2776_1092223023347_1159650176_30324948_6804839_n

You get a ‘Z’ grade, Sae K.

Awesome dreams, Man!

I was all skydiving into a vat of tuna when I suddenly woke up in the living room, Man!

flyingcat01

WHOOOOA Ela B.!

It’s Time for Cat Massage!

Petting is passé; your cat wants a massage. From Everything is Terrible comes edited highlights from this inane how-to video, offering such pearls of truth as:

  • Massage will randomly transform your cat into a stuffed animal;
  • A “drooler” is not a person specializing in rings and watches;
  • Right-handed people should use their right hand.

Who’s the best sender-inner in the United States?  It’s you, Nicole M., it’s you!

In Just 30 Seconds, You Will Utterly Despise The New York Lottery

Oh sure, it gets off to a promising start, but just you wait: In mere moments, you will yearn for a plague of locusts to blacken the skies above their offices, and to hear the wailing and lamentations of their Marketing executives.

Wait for it… Wa-a-a-a-ait for it…

But sender-inner S.A. thought it was cute, so we’ll let them live.

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 14,384 other followers