My name is Betty and I…

[Pause]

My name is—well, I’m Betty.

and… I—I have a bit of a problem that landed me in the "time out" corner.

You see, I strongly believe that bed linen wrinkles are OUT TO GET US ALL and must be attacked. I didn’t MEAN to tear your duvet to shreds, but it’s for your own safety. [Closes eyes and sighs loudly]

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Vicky, stay safe! [head tilt]

[Hanging 20 joke here]

CHAKA BRA!

Imperial Beach was once again home to the Loews Coronado Bay Resort Surf Dog Competition, where pups surfed to wild applause… Some photos from the past couple of years competishe:

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Ruff Riders, originally uploaded by Broompl (Pete).

 


Ruff Riders, originally uploaded by Broompl (Pete).

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Tubular, Flavia…

That’s “leche,” Señor Einstein

"So I’m making my usual rounds of the Dumpsters out back of Denny’s, when I see this sign that says ‘tryouts for Lucha Libre’."  And right away I’m thinking, "Free milk?! Well, sign me up!

"Turns out my high-school Spanish was a little rusty, because now I’m bouncing all over frickin’ Mexico in a tour bus with no A/C, my stupid mask itches and these tights keep riding up, and five nights a week, some sweaty gorilla who calls himself El Máximo gets to twist me into balloon animals.

"But the chicks dig the cape.  So there’s that."

¡Dios meow!

¡Ay, caramba, Lauren M!

Wuv, Twoo Wuv…

…that dweam wiffin a dweam…
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May it fowwow you… fowevvah…

(twoo wuv comes in many wondwous fowms)

Double Corgi Baroo Action

B

A

R

O

O

OOOOO? <–head just tilted

Thanks to the giggular Heather G.

Stubbular, Unfocused McSquirmersons

Will you please get a load of these guys as they;

- Discover their own legs!

- Can’t walk!

- CANNOT FOCUS TO SAFE THEIR LIFES!

The best part is Mom kitteh checking in and starting to lift one of the kittens up by its leg. Someone call Kitteh Protective Services.

I love the larval stage, Allison T.!

How to Solve a Catsaw Puzzle

Forget Scrabulous. Forget Scramble. It’s all about Catsaw puzzles.

Start with one of the pieces near the edge, and work your way into the center.

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Eventually, all of the pieces should fit together snugly, like this:

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Thanks to Emily C. (top photo) and Shannon C. (bottom photo)

How I Met Your Father

"Lordy me, that picture takes me back.  It was at the Rotary Club picnic, and there was this boy — and I swear he must have followed us the whole afternoon, working up his nerve.  Finally he comes up to me — and of course he was much thinner then, dont’cha know, and he still had all his fur — and he just stands there, staring.

"Well, after a few minutes of this, I give up and turn to get some more tuna casserole, and he just up and bites me on the tail!  Right in front of everybody!  And well, of course I’m just madder than I-don’t-know-what-all, and I’m about to haul off and slug him, when I get a look into his eyes.  And it was like they were pleading with me: Don’t go.

CHOMP!

"And I figured, if a feller wants a girl bad enough to bite her on the tail, he must want her awful bad.  That was forty-seven years ago, and we been together ever since.  Missed the fireworks and everything.

"Well, not entirely."

AWWWW!

Thanks for the memories, Dia H.

Tomorrow’s rodent rock stars today

At the Squirrel Academy of Music, we’re training tomorrow’s rodent rock stars today.

You’ll learn all the secrets of the pros, from how to smash a guitar to advanced hotel room demolition techniques. With guitars.

In this photo, Professor Melvin "Johnny Hazard" Goldblatz (center) leads a seminar in intermediate microphone posing.

Watch your balance, Jenkins ... Leroy, get that chest out!'

Can you get us backstage, Rebecca W.?

Is it hot in here, or is it just you?

"Hey, baby — how YOU doin’? I haven’t seen you around here before; you new in town?  You must be from Tennessee, because honey, you’re the only ten I see!  I never knew angels flew this low, baby — what time do you have to be back in Heaven?  Why don’t you ditch that hand and come back to my place for, ah … dinner."

That'd be dinner for one -- right, Casanova?

Don’t let her do it, Sig!