You ask and you shall receive!

Many of you wanted to see MORE MORE MORE photos of this crazy kitteh. Well, here they are. We hope you’re happy now.

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Like a first date, this kitteh appears pretty normal at first… BUT THEN

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"aynng aynngh aynngh" [chewing on blankie sound]

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There is just NO TELLING what you’re in for, is there Tiffany G.?

This little guy "Victor" was up for adopshe at Bid-a-Wee in Manhattan.

What Really Happened to Yakky Doodle

"So I says to him, I says, it’s no skin off my beak how he runs his business, but he oughta be more careful flashin’ that money around or the Feds are liable to learn how he’s been cookin’ the books all these years, which will also come as a bit of a surprise to his wife, since it’s how he’s been paying off that stripper in Reno to keep her mouth shut … say, we’re kinda deep in the forest — are you sure this is the way to the Greyhound station?"

And what are you doing with that shovel?

You didn’t see nuttin’, Holly P.

Black and white and viewed all over

From the cartoon kitteh genius Simon Tofield, comes the third installment of our favorite annoying Kitteh who points at his mouth for eats. Oh, and Simon’s other awesome cartoons are below, just in case you missed ‘em the first time around ’cause you’re living under a rock or something.

Simon is part of Tandem Films, a very talented UK-based animations outfit.

You little STINKER!

You are SUCH a little stinker.

Look at you. Stinking up the place.

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Ew! Annie M.! via HAPPYLOLDAY. Photo by LadiesWhoKill.

Duck Darwin Awards

Ducks have it rough in the big city, People. You remember this scene, right?

Well, gather ’round ’cause we have another applicant to the Duck Darwin awards. Sender-Inner Kathryn’s Mom writes:

"Something really amazing happened in Downtown Spokane this week and I had to share the story with you. [My colleague] Joel is a loan officer at Sterling [Savings] Bank. He works downtown in a second story office building, overlooking busy Riverside Avenue. Several weeks ago he watched a mother duck choose the cement awning outside his window as the uncanny place to build a nest above the sidewalk."

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"The mallard laid ten eggs in a nest in the corner of the planterthat is perched over 10 feet in the air. She dutifully kept the eggswarm for weeks and Monday afternoon all of her ducklings hatched."

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"Joel worried all night how the momma duck was going to get thosebabies safely off their perch in a busy, downtown, urban environment totake to water, which typically happens in the first 48 hours of a duckhatching."

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"Tuesday morning, Joel came to work and watched the mother duck encourage her babies to the edge of the perch with the intent to show them how to jump off!"

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"The mother flew down below and started quacking to her babies above. Inhis disbelief Joel watched as the first fuzzy newborn toddled to theedge and astonishingly leapt into thin air, crashing onto the cementbelow. He couldn’t watch how this might play out. He dashed out of hisoffice and ran down the stairs the sidewalk where the first obedientduckling was stumbling near its mother from the near fatal fall. Joellooked up. The second duckling was getting ready to jump!"

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"He quickly dodged under the awning while the mother duck quacked at himand the babies above. As the second one took the plunge, Joel jumpedforward and caught it with his bare hands before it hit the cement.Safe and sound, he set it by the momma and the other stunned sibling,still recovering from its painful leap."

Mom, my legs are smooshed to halfsize now, thanks A LOT.

"One by one the babies continued to jump to join their anxious family below. Each time Joel hid under the awning just to reach out in the nick of time as the duckling made its free fall."

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"The downtown sidewalk came to a standstill. Time after time, Joel wasable to catch the remaining 8 and set them by their approving mother."

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"At this point Joel realized the duck family had only made part of itsdangerous journey. They had 2 full blocks to walk across traffic,crosswalks, curbs, and pedestrians to get to the closest open water,the Spokane River."

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"The onlooking office secretaries then joined in, and hurriedly brought an empty copy paper box to collect the babies. They carefully corralled them, with the mother’s approval, and loaded them up into the white cardboard container. Joel held the box low enough for the mom to see her brood. He then slowly navigated through the downtown streets toward the Spokane River , as the mother waddled behind and kept her babies in sight. As they reached the river, the mother took over and passed him, jumping into the river and quacking loudly. At the water’s edge, the Sterling Bank office staff then tipped the box and helped shepherd the babies toward the water and to their mother after their adventurous ride."

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"All ten darling ducklings safely made it into the water and paddled upsnugly to momma duck. Joel said the mom swam in circles, looking backtoward the beaming bank workers, and proudly quacking as if to say,’See, we did it! Thanks for all the help!’"

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Did you sell the rights to LifeTime yet, Kathryn M.?

The Something in the Something

To:     Meg
From: NTMTOM
Re:     Kitten Photos

Thank you so much for sharing the adorable photos of the kitten reclining in the baseball cap.  I quite concur, they are among the most charming I’ve ever seen, and I shall endeavor to post them as soon as possible.  But unfortunately, at the moment — and I find this a trifle embarrassing to admit — I seem to have the most damnable case of writer’s block.  Surely, I reason, there must be a pithy way to summarize this scene in my inimitable fashion — "The Feline in the Headgear," perhaps, or "The Calico in the Cap" — but alas, the harder I search for it, the more it eludes me.

Sheesh, is this idiot for real?

But nonetheless, I am undaunted. Perseverance is my life’s blood, and excelsior my motto.  If it takes me all evening, I shall craft a missive possessing of that elusive spark of wit your readers have come to expect.

Yeah, you do that, Shakespeare.

Thank you for playing Stump the Writer, Amy Lee B.

[How about "The Tom in the Toque?" - Ed.]

Mrs. Gunderson Pauses to Reflect

"Oh, sure — he just wanted to show me his etchings, he said.  It would only take a few minutes, he said.  *sigh…*  I was happy once; I had a career, I had my figure, I went to parties every night.  And now look at me."

At least the 'only a few minutes' part was honest, grr...

What can I say, Jill?   We men are all alike.

Insane in the mem!

Um.

This is both heartwarming AND hilarious at the same time. Are these crazy Peruvians for reals? Please get a load of this Sea Lion Rehabilitayshe Action. Meanwhile, I’ll be bellowing crazy sea lion sounds to whomever will listennnnBAROOOOGAH!

Please go up to your officemate and bellow in his ear, Adrian W. Please. Then send us a video of it.

Mews + Stubbularness = <3

What am I, a 12-year-old girl with that kind of blog post title!?!? WAIT Don’t answer that!!!

P to the U to the R to the R, Sparky B. >^.•.^< OMG, Pon1es!

At the Tuscadero State Asylum for Supervillains

"Exxxxxxxx-cellent!  My hypno-mind-control ray is almost complete.  The fools at the science academy, they all said that I was mad — MAD, I tell you!  But soon they ALL will bow down before me!  MWAH-ha-ha-ha-ha-haaaaaaa!"

... and we can start with that orderly who keeps short-sheeting my bed.

Might want to up the dosage a little, Tiffany G.