Peekaboo Cockatoo

Peekaboo cockatoo
Plays wit’choo all day through
I would too, wouldn’t you?

New from Ikea

Add warmth and style to your living room with the FLØÖF accent rug ($39). Also available: SPÔT rug (white w/black spots), MEØW rug (black w/eyes).


“Fifth time this week I misplaced my Yorkie” says Redditor fogflip.

So You Wanna Join the Spacing Guild, Eh?

Ya got moxie, kid — I like that. Yep, start ’em early, that’s what I say. It’s a great career if you can stick it out. You’re gonna want to start hitting the spice now, of course, and enroll in space-folding lessons…


Via Reddit.

Young Master Algernon T. Farpherphaffle Contemplates His Afternoon Agenda

“(A jaunt through the forest on my favorite stallion, I wonder? Or perhaps to purloin father’s Packard for an afternoon of croquet at Mimsy’s. Or merely to retire to the library and untangle the Gordian knot of Plato. Or simply enjoy a tasty banana. A banana would be nice indeed. I like bananas. I even enjoy the word ‘banana.’ Banana. Banana. Baaaaaaah-naaaaaaaan-naaaaaaah.)”


Via Farhad Sadykov.

Good Luck Kicking Those Buckets

The management of Andme Downs racetrack have announced a rules change for the upcoming Kentucky Fried Derby. In order to assure a fair race, undefeated horse Lightning Bolt will be required to wear buckets of cement.


Via Reddit/Imgur.

Also Starring a Juggling Elvis Impersonator on a Unicycle Who Plays Spoons

Next time you’re in Vegas, check out the hottest show in town: Wowie-Zowie! now showing nightly at the Schlockadero Hotel/Casino, just off the Las Vegas Strip (via 12-mile dirt side road)! Starring Vegas’ cutest showgirls and funniest animal performers (due to budget cuts, combined into one act)!


“He wanted to be fruit salad so bad,” says Redditor _ByTeMe_.

It Looks So Easy in the Movies

“(… as we join Indiana Jones, he find himself surrounded by the savage Whitebird Tribe of the Kalahari! Deftly, our hero takes out his bullwhip, and with a mighty crack, he…  er, he… whoa, kinda hard to control this thing…)”


Your Astral Journey Begins

As you breathe in the essences of ginger root, lavender, and Pine-Sol, your body relaxes and prepares for the projection. Next, you hear the ancient hymn of yoth’kaBleen, summoning the Ancient Spirits. Once you wear the Sacred Petals, other dimensions will unfold. Perhaps you will see mountains of pure aluminum. A menswear shop in Boise. Caesar’s Palace. No, the one in Rome. For each seeker, the journey is unique and wonderful.

Gorilla Your Dreams

Hello, ladies. It is I, Shabani. It is said that Shabani is handsome. Very handsome. Women come to see Shabani at the zoo where Shabani lives. The piercing, thoughtful gaze of Shabani flutters their hearts. Or rustles their jimmies. One of those. Shabani is not sure.


But the women know Shabani is not just handsome. Shabani is kind. Shabani cares for his children. Shabani loves children. They are delicious.

Shabani is a 18 year old male gorilla at Higashiyama Zoo and Botanical Garden. The "handsome" gorilla is super popular with young ladies and families. Zoo officials tell CNN that he got the stardom after the netizens started to tweeting and FBing about his handsome photo used for its spring festival posters in April.

Alas, the women, they cannot know Shabani’s heart. Shabani is a riddle, wrapped in an enigma, stuffed into a banana only Shabani can peel. Shabani is distant. Lonely. Shabani can only refer to himself in the third person. That is how lonely he is.


C.O. Backyard Decorating Tips

A hummingbird feeder can be a wonderful addition to any backyard. The ability to feed and observe one of Nature’s most amazing creatures can bring tranquility to any summer afternoon. However, if the feeder is not properly located, it can attract unwanted insects, such as the horse-fly.


Via Reddit.


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