Everything is placed according to my perfectly impeccable logic. For example, the earbuds are next to the flip-flops because the cords are two feet long. The stapler, calculator and kid’s writing tablet, that’s my office supplies section. And the dishrag is next to the catnip bag because they rhyme.

Yee-up, you are looking at the next assistant manager of this place. This is the kind of bold, innovative thinking that gets a fellow noticed around here.

Via djprybyl.

I told you there were crocodiles in these waters, but did anyone listen? Noooooooooo! Anyway, I call dibs on his skateboard!

Via Bev Goodwin.

I’d better turn this situation around or I’ll be the butt of jokes around here.

Ah, that’s better. Now I can show my face again.

Via Randi Deuro.

On Bunday, for our breakfast break
A baffling baguette we bake
It serves two needs instead of one:
A loaf, but also just a bun.

Via swruler9284.

No matter how cute your dog is, it’ll never be the cutest thing on a leash, now that we have Haku, the star attraction at this aquarium in Japan.

Here’s the lineup for the fourth race at Hollywood Bark. Bury That Bone is on the inside, followed by Hydrant Go Seek, Stop Doing That To My Leg, Midnight Collar, Leash Resistance, I’m Serious Stop Doing That, Suppertime Blues, Ken-L Racer, and at forty to one, Look I’m Not Telling You Again It’s Creeping Me Out.

And here’s a late substitution: That Itch in That Place You Can’t Reach has been scratched, and instead jockey “Peewee” Martinez will ride Labridoodle Dandy…

Via eblaser.

Say, what’s the big idea of taking me from my mommy and poking and prodding and flashing me with that light thingy? Just for that, I shall unleash my Squeak of Furious Rage! There, that’ll show you.

Once again, gravity will be temporarily suspended this Sunday between 2 and 3 AM EST for software upgrades. Please keep all pets indoors. Thank you.

Via fuzzysaurus.