It’s Kind of “Grello”

For the fourth time, Abigail failed her driver’s license test when she was unable to tell the difference between the yellow and green traffic lights.

Circular Reasoning

“(When I walk in a circle, the chair feels more comfy. Does that mean I’m actually making the chair more comfy? What if there’s no upper limit to how comfy this chair can get? If I keep going, I could experience a Zen-like level of comfyness! We could be talking comfy Nirvana, here!)”

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It’s Like Christmas, But With More… Me

No sooner do I finish chewing each stocking
When I see you commit a faux pas quite shocking
You’re up taking snapshots, but wait just a minute
This scene is defective, because I’m not in it
Why waste your megapixels on a tree
When you could be capturing beautiful me?
Never mind sparkly lights; I’m brighter by far
I’m like having your very own Christmas star
So when I see that camera, I’ll be a go-getter
And get in each shot… Ah, yes, that’s better.

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“Accidentally created a camera hog,” says Redditor spunwasi. “Now this happens when I try to take a photo.”

I Shall Guard this Ball With My Life

This is MY BALL and it belongs to me and it is mine and also I own it and you may not take MY BALL from me and I shall maintain a vigilant watch on MY BALL at all times to protect MY BALL from zombies and ghosts and evil bunny slippers and…

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“He fell asleep with the ball in his mouth,” explains Redditor iBleeedorange.

Meanwhile, at Camp Wanaleekya’s “Salute to the First Thanksgiving” Pageant…

“Why look, Josiah Witherspoon! Our guests have brought with them a sample of the many vegetables that grow abundantly here in the New World!”

“How right you are, Sarah Miller! I believe they call it ‘corn’.”

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“My view before I tasted this sweetcorn,” notes Flickrer Twinkle Enyong.

Oh, Those Glamorous 70’s

Amid the glitter and excess of New York’s nightlife scene, no venue was more exclusive than Manhattan’s Kennel 54. Located in the alley behind Studio 54, it admitted only the top dogs, who waited expectantly behind the velvet rope.

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Via RD_Elsie.

Do You Like My Ears Up or Down?

Me, I’m kinda fifty-fifty on the matter. Could go this way or that. Six of one, half a dozen of the other. Neither fish nor fowl…

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Via Silversnow

Joy and Rapture, You’ve Returned At Last!

Second after second, minute after agonizing minute I waited, daring to hope that I would once more hear the crunch of your footsteps in the midday snow, and gaze again upon your warm face! This is the happiest moment of my life since yesterday!

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Via Reddit.

Heeere I Come to Make a Salaaaaad!

By day, mild-mannered Hugh Manatee glides unnoticed among the krill, sturgeon, and trout going about their business in Aquaburg. But whenever sea life is threatened by injustice, whenever a shrimp cries out in terror, whenever bacon and tomato feel lonely and incomplete, Hugh Manatee becomes… The Lettuce Avenger!

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Columbus Zoo photo spotted by Carly Brooke of The Featured Creature.

Got a Quarter, Mom?

C’mon, Mom, just a couple of quarters so I can ride! Three little quarters, that’s all I ask! I swear, if you let me have four quarters, I’ll never ask for another thing!

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Via Sean Loyless.

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