Bet He’s Having a Really Funny Dream

“Oh, I am. I’m chasing this gazelle, see (snert!), and for some reason there’s an ice-skating rink in the middle of the Serengeti (chortle!), and anyway, the gazelle slips on a banana peel, and (pffrt, snort!) slides across the ice like in Bambi (hee-hee, that part always cracks me up).”


“And then the gazelle (tssst, pfft!) then the gazelle plows into these penguins set up like bowling pins (hoo hoo hee hee!), and the only one left standing says (tshhh, snicker, oh this’ll killya), he says ‘I’m glad we brought a spare!’ BAHAHAHAHA! A spare, get it?”


Hyena cub, via Leo Li.


Are Your Windows Puppy-Kleen?

Want cleaner windows without all the work? Just spray them with Puppy-Kleen™ canine incentive solution! Puppy-Kleen adds an invisible FlavrLayr™ that dogs can’t resist, and within minutes, your windows are sparkling! Puppy-Kleen comes in bacon, liver, steak, and for a limited time, new Pumpkin Spice!


Via Britt Britt.

Ferret-Ferrying Flume Fails; Feds Frantic

DEER LOOGIE, MT — Operators of the Transcontinental Ferret Pipeline have reported a major breach, causing a ferret spill about one mile in diameter. Federal investigators cite human error as the cause, noting the pipeline had been accidentally set for both eastbound and westbound traffic.


Endangered black-footed ferrets, via USFWS Mountain-Prairie.

Let’s Stick Together

“Om-peh-ih-ive? Uch? Ee’re ogh uh eash iggle ict om-peh-ih-ive!”


On the Road Again

“Oh, yah, retirement’s been good to Larry’n me so far, no complaints. We just got back from visiting my sister in Arizona — oh, it’s so hot down there, don’cha know, don’t know how they stand it. Anyways, we’re gunna swing east before we head home, ’cause Larry wants to visit the World’s Largest Hydrant out’n Oklahoma.”


“These pups have an RV to match their owners!” notes Ark Portable Power.

Les Ballets Quackadero de Monte Carlo

Seen here, preparing for their production of Swan Lake, are (from left): Omaya Wannakeesya, Ludmilla Pekinov, Alila Peeppeeppeepska, and Bill.


Via Imgur. Apologies to these guys.

But I’m Already In Bed!

Seriously, if you think the cage is so wonderful, you sleep in there!

Escargot Getcher Own, Pal

To attain true Zen enlightenment, one must be at peace with every creature, even the lowly snail. The true Zen master becomes one with all things, no matter how slimy… HEY! That’s not what I mean by “become one with,” buddy!

Via RocketNews24.

This Date in Video Game History

In 1985, video game designer Shigeru Miyamoto racked his brain trying to invent a new character to be a sidekick for Mario, when suddenly he saw his cat wearing a towel and shower cap. Excitedly, he presented his inspiration to the Nintendo board of directors — only to discover that the character of “Tweety Bird” was already trademarked.


“Walked in on my sister giving our cat a bath, this is what I saw.” Via Imgur.

Meanwhile, on the Dogville Airport Shuttle…

“(Ugh, it’s like a sardine can in here, and of course every one of these guys will need to stop at a different terminal before I get off. And could that guy up front mouthing off about the Packers game be any louder? *sniff* Oh, for crying out loud, who had the breakfast burrito?!)”

Treat - Imgur

Via Imgur.