C.O. Presents: Cuisine of the World!

What’s the perfect complement to Swiss cheese?  Swiss bread, of course!  Rarely seen outside the Alps, Brot voller Löcher is a hearty, whole-grain bread with an unusual pattern of Swiss cheese-like holes.  Locals say it’s good luck when the holes in your bread-and-cheese sandwich align perfectly.  But while Swiss cheese gets its holes from naturally-occurring pockets of trapped gas, Swiss bread requires a more laborious process…

... yeah, and it's hell on my waistline, too.

I think I’ll just have the salad, Zana F.

Paaaaaaarrrrrrrrr–TAAAAAAAYYYYYYY!

Winnoi

Whoooo-HOOOO!  Cute Overload just won an award in the 2009 Weblog Awards announced tonight at South by Southwest!

We were nominated in the category of "Best Topical Weblog," which is a special category for weblogs that can be applied directly to the skin.

Thhay, thath's thupendouth!

Thanks for bringing dessert, Christina V.

UGG!

Just for clarity, that’s "UGG!" as in "will you just look at this mess?" and not "Ugg" as in "popular brand of stylish outdoor footwear."  Although, quite honestly, that is a good look for you:  The palette of whites and off-whites is flattering, and the flared legs have a funky retro feel to them…

Gee, thanks, Mr. Blackwell.  Where's the blow dryer?

I’ve got some syrup, Rita L. — Let’s make sno-cones!
[Yes, peeps, it's another C.O. Encore Presentayshe - Ed.]

Good Evening, Mister Bond

I’m so glad you could join us, my old nemesis; I do hope my henchmen didn’t treat you roughly.  You’re just in time to watch me unleash my army of killer robo-ferrets upon an unsuspecting world — but first, I will explain my sinister plan to you in elaborate detail at great length, which will give you time to escape and ruin everything.

Don't know why I do that; we villains can be kinda dumb sometimes.

Evil never looked so cuddly, Kate S.

I Don’t Like This Planet, Mommy

"I hate this place — everything’s all flat and quiet.  Yeah, sure, there’s people, but nobody talks to me or pets me or anything.  I mean, check out Necktie Boy, here; I lick his face, give him my best sad-eyes routine, and what do I get?  Bupkis!  And the worst part is that there’s all this food, and I can’t eat any of it!

"On the plus side, though, I’m feeling very motivated to quit smoking.  Whatever that is."

The snozzberries most decidedly DO NOT taste like snozzberries.

Maybe a trip to Sofaland will cheer him up, Steph W.

There’s a Seeker Born Every Minute

Each of us is born into a lonely quest.  Young and old, rich and poor, from mighty king to lowly beggar, our lives are marked by the trails of our ceaseless yearnings, like maps to treasure we never find.

Seriously, I just don't get it sometimes...

For some, it is Love, that blissful release from earthly cares, adrift in the arms of that one special someone.  For others, it is Knowledge, the skeleton key that unlocks every mystery and lays bare the soul of Truth.

... I mean, I'm just sayin', you'd think it wouldn't be such a big deal...

… and then, if you’re this bozo, you just want a conditioner that tames split ends.

... if they can put a man on the moon and all...

We may need to break out the hot-oil treatment, Tina W.

Klamath Falls, 1963

OK, so me and my friend Danny get to go camping, except Danny’s mom said that Danny’s sister Marlys had to come too, and my mom made me take my brother Ralph and said we couldn’t hike fast on account of he has asthma and stuff.

And Marlys had this big crush on me, but of course she pretended she didn't.

So we were in the forest, and Marlys said she was pretty sure that this is where Old Man Morris lives, who’s supposed to be this scary old guy with a hook for a hand who cooks little kids and eats ‘em.  And I said "cut it out, Marlys, that’s just a ghost story."

But we stuck together anyway, just to be safe.

"Is not," says Marlys.  "Jimmy Beaverton saw him when he took a short cut home from Jamboree last summer.  There was this wheezy voice saying ‘My, you’re a tasty thing, aren’t ya?’ and that’s when he saw him."

"Oh, Jimmy Beaverton eats boogers and thinks Howdy Doody is real," I tell her.  "What does he know?"  And she says "Fine — you’re so smart, let’s see you walk down there by yourself."

                    um, OK...

So now I have to do it or I’ll look stupid.  And then the forest gets really quiet, and the birds stop singing all at once, and all I can hear is the snow crunch under my feet.  And then I stop, and I hear something … wheezing.

( I'm *not* a tasty thing, I'm *not* a tasty thing... )

So Marlys screams at me and Danny screams at Marlys and Ralphie just screams at everybody, and we all run back to camp the whole way without stopping.  Anyway, it turns out the wheezing was just because Ralphie couldn’t find his inhaler.

But we never went back there anyway, just to be safe.

Photos from Jennifer T. (with an assist from Alexis M. & Sarah F.S.)

No More Scary Movies For You, Dad

"It’s the same story every time we watch a Freddy or Jason movie:  You always say ‘I’m a big boy now, I can handle it,’ and by the time the picture’s over, you end up whimpering in my bed."

But I *swear* I can hear a chainsaw in the next room!

Looks like someone could use this handy How To Survive A Slasher Movie guide, JC.

The New Bird Clashes With Everything

"Mama’s little favorite, aren’t we?  I suppose you think you’re soooo much better than I am, just because you happen to match the furniture!"

Why, yes.  Yes, I am.

I think he really ties the room together, Kathy F.

Breaking News Bulletin!

NEW JERSEY—Bodyguards protect Percival Q. Gringflabble, alleged Mafia accountant, as he arrives at the Federal courthouse to testify against his employers.

BlackCatsWhiteDoll

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