A Day Without Cats: Lessons Learned

Well, another first-ever Day Without Cats has come and gone, never to come again.  And like all historical watershed moments, it impels us to reflect; about us, the Internet, and on the debt we owe to our irreplaceable friend, the cat.

For the cat is more than mere companion, more than protector from the vicious mouse and his flesh-melting death ray, more than the reassuring presence who greets our return each day with cheerful, loving indifference.  He is also our mentor.

For while our great scientific minds struggle vainly to teach cats the intricacies of double-entry bookkeeping and interpretive dance, the cat has a simpler lesson for us:  Approach life with wonder, with eyes wide open, with insatiable curiosity…

… and most of all, dignity.  Always dignity.

Ode to a Day Without Cats

A Day Without Cats? Can this be?
We must stop this catastrophe!

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Search everywhere, from up to down,
And don’t give up until they’re found!

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We’ll catacomb the countryside
To find out where our kitties hide.

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Until we thwart this plan demonic
We’ll search until we’re catatonic!

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We love to hug and chase them so,
Please, Internet, don’t erase them! No!

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Oh, heed our plaintive caterwaul,
Or life will be no fun at all.

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Photos: Burrowing Owl by Barloventomagico. Now I can see better by annkelliott, Meerkat Mischief by MorningThief581. Peek-a-Boo! by Somesay. Tin Head by Dragonfly_dreamer72 and Peek-a-Boo! by Gilles Gonthier.

So, Dr. Charmin, My Old Nemesis…

… we meet again!  You look surprised to see me, you villainous swine…

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Perhaps you’re wondering how I escaped your thugs in Tangiers…

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And that bomb in the Swiss embassy — that was meant for me, I assume?

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It was the girl who warned me — you should never have trusted her…

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And now it’s the end of the line for you, evildoer!

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The sender-inner?  The name’s W. — Robin W.

Benson Hedges, Private Eye in: The Case of the Kidnapped Kitties!

It was one of those nights when all a tired gumshoe wants is to get away from the babes and bullets and have a nice meal in a restaurant where they don’t pat you down for weapons. And so I was about to drown my sorrows in a bowl of Miss Kitty’s famous five-alarm chili when it hit me: Miss Kitty was gone!

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Now, another Joe might have shrugged it off, but when this nose smells trouble, buddy, I follow it. So my partner and I staked out an abandoned warehouse…

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“Follow me,” I said. “We’re going in!” But he just stood there with that dopey grin on his face. He was too yellow, and I’d have to go it alone.

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When I got inside, I could hear muffled voices, saying something about “a day without cats.” So that was their plan; Miss Kitty was only the beginning. They wouldn’t stop until they’d stolen every kitten from the Internet — unless I stopped them first.

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Can Benson corral the catty kidnappers and crack the case? Will tomorrow truly be A Day Without Cats? Stay tuned for the next thrilling episode!

Photos from “My Hedgehog” by Yoppy.

Mmmm… Crunchy!

Golly, I just haven’t been getting enough fiber in my diet lately… Say, this looks tasty… earmn nawm nawm munch munch…

Baby Mongooses… Mongeese… (um…)

The Bronx Zoo recently welcomed a trio of baby mongooseses… er, mongoosi.  Here, mama mongoose monitors her mongoslings.  (Hm, that didn’t sound right… mongrels, maybe? Nah, really no…)

Raiders of the Lost Ook

Dr. Jones coiled his bullwhip and gazed at the crumbling stone altar just paces away.  Atop it sat the squat bronze idol, as it had for centuries, returning his gaze with mocking contempt.

“Let us hurry,” said the guide.  “There is nothing to fear here.”

“That’s what scares me,” said Jones.

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Once again, Chantal P., what was briefly yours is now mine! (evil laughter)

Friday Haiku: “Oops, We Forgot” Edition

Blah blah blah blah dog
Blah blah blah blah blah blah chick
Blah blah write haiku

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Your pup’s quite a chick magnet, Lauren R.

Cue Overload

My friends, we got trouble!  Right here in River City!  With a capital “T” and that rhymes with “C” and that stands for cute!

A Vacation Horror Story

It was the worst Mardi Gras of Estelle’s life.

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For starters, she and her girlfriends hardly got any beads at all.

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And then the hotel overbooked and they had to huddle together outside.

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And worst of all, this place didn’t look anything like New Orleans.

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Photos by Ryan M., who isn’t quite sure how the kitties got those pearls.