You Dream It; Winston Does It

As we celebrate the season of gluttony, Winston decides to dispense with the silverware and push his face straight into his Thanksgiving feast.  Don’t tell me you haven’t considered doing this yourself at least once.

We give thanks to Rich over at FourFour!

This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

“I leave you alone for the day, and just look at this mess! The toilet paper’s shredded, there’s trash all over the floor, a team of squirrels is running a telemarketing call center from the guest bedroom, and a man outside wants to know where to install my weapons-grade uranium centrifuge!”

Hey, talk to the cat about the toilet paper, man.

Did you order these 24 pizzas, Emily D.?

C.O. Celebrity Scandal Watch!

Tongues wagged this week as papparazzi spotted superstars Britney Ears and Hugh Jackrabbit at a romantic getaway in Tahiti, protected by their bodyguard Bruno.

Dahhhh, nothin' to see here, move along...

Well, I never, Carly R.

I’ll See Your TEH QTE and Raise You…

OK, maybe the car isn’t as cuddly as a Nash (what is?), but frequent commenter Yitzysmommie takes it to the streets with her custom license plate.  “Tried to get Yitzy to sit with me on the bumpere,” she says, “but he was like ‘Nyerhle.’ “

I Missed the 6:42 Again?!

Oh, swell! Now I’ll be late for my big presentation to Amalgamated Acorns!

Maybe you could give him a lift, Sonya C.

I Can’t Bear to Look

First the good news:  Your job lets you cuddle with fuzzy wuzzy bear cubs.  Now for the “uh-oh” part:  You have to track down their mom across the snows of Maine, get her sedated (at least five Brandy Alexanders), give her and the kids a physical, and wrap it all up before the drugs wear off.  Sound like fun?

More photos and story about the Maine Bear Monitoring program here, hat tip to sender-inner Jackie.

Mmmmaaaarrrruuuu!

Ttthhheee ooonnnlllyyy ttthhhiiinnnggg bbbeeettteeerrr ttthhhaaannn Mmmaaarrruuu iiisss Mmmaaarrruuu iiinnn ssslllooowww mmmoootttiiiooonnn…

A Fish Tail

Frankly, I don’t get the appeal.  They just sit there in a boat, dangling a piece of string in the water.  They say it’s relaxing and all, but I don’t wanna relax!  I wanna run, jump around — you know, dog stuff — but instead I’m stuck here staring at this water for hours.  And I haven’t even seen one fish.  Not.  One.  Fish.

And to top it all off, my tail hurts for some reason.

Well, who wouldn’t want to nibble a cutie like that, Susan S.?

THIS JUST IN: Skateboarding Bulldog

Over at Gizmodo, half the peeps are all like “Dude, that’s so fake, that dog isn’t really playing that game,” and the other half is all like “Yeah, but he thinks he is, he’s like totally rockin’ it,” but we know you’re gonna be all like “Awwww, puppeh” and stuff.

Hamster for a Day!

Call your travel agent:  A hotel in Nantes, France lets guests feast on hamster grain, run in a giant wheel and sleep in hay stacks in a suite designed to resemble a hamster cage.  Judging from these absolutely-100-percent-genuine-no-honestly-would-we-lie-to-you photos, the level of detail is amazingly lifelike.

Photos of “Gadget” from Arlene F., who’ll be getting extra mints on her pillow.

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