(Gawrsh, I’m So Nervous)

(Oh, these blind dates are nerve-wracking, I never know what to do… Am I supposed to say something, or does she say something? I think I have some bird seed stuck in my beak; is she staring at it? Aww, and I forgot to put on my under-wing deodorant, pee-yew!)


Via Clint Mason.


Memories of Bygone Days

“Yes, I remember this picture, this was taken in summer of ’39 — it was ’39, wasn’t it, Estelle? — yes, and Daddy had just bought this dashing Packard roadster that we took into town. Beaumont was our driver, he’d been with the family for years, but we girls called him ‘Monty’ when we were feeling especially daring…”


I’m Such a Swell Guy!

Not to get a big head or anything, but I’m just busting out with pride!

Via Fancy.

Why Don’t You Come Up and See Me Sometime?

We can monkey around, heh-heh. Well, to be precise, we can lemur around, but that isn’t as catchy as… OK, to be extremely precise, we can sifaka around, but now we’re getting a bit more provocative than I was shooting for.


Via The Telegraph. Thanks to sender-inner Arne.

Your Teddy Bear Would Like a Word

“Sure, go off to school. I’ll be fine here. Don’t worry about me. I’ll just sit here on the bed and wait for you. It’s nice there. Quiet. Peaceful. Nobody picking me up and throwing me around the room. Sometimes a breeze makes the curtains flutter a little. That’s always exciting. So, basically, what I’m saying is…



What’s Cooking?

Say, those are a lot of potatoes you’re chopping up there. Oooh, yes, and carrots, don’t forget the carrots. Ehh, go easy on the onions, they give me gas. So, I assume there will be a roast at some point, yes? What’s the main ingredient?


Via Reddit.

Goody, “Sesame Street” is On…

Bet’cha can’t guess who my favorite character is! Go ahead, guess.


Via Reddit.

I Am the Goddess of the Fall

Though the leaves may fall from the tree, mourn them not;
For I wear them as my crown, proclaiming their once-green glory
Into the white winter.
Unless I start feeling a bit peckish,
And then perhaps I shall nibble the leaves of the mighty maple tree
Which really aren’t that bad if you know how to prepare them.


Via Pixabay.

Why Can’t I Be a Fire Poodle?

How come I only see dalmatians working in fire houses? When do I get my big break, huh? Look! I can even slide down the fire pole!


Via Imgur.

The Crawl of Duty

Hey… you there… must crawl… to where… you are…


Important… message… to tell… you… Almost… there…


Sand… hot… Strength… fading… Must… con… tin… u… e…


You have… spinach in… teeth… Will get… toothpick… Wait… here…


Via Jared Sternberg.