The Ferret Dispenser’s Clogged Again…

It never fails: I put in my dollar, and what happens? When the stupid machine isn’t just taking my money and not giving me any ferret, it sends down two! Sheesh!

Now I have to walk all the way to Hannah P.’s office and get a refund slip.

I Am the Kibble Dancer

Each day, I journey to the ceremonial supper dish in the sacred kitchen, and offer my humble dance to the Kibble Gods. If my dance pleases them, they will send the Benevolent Hand, bringing her life-giving nourishment for the people in my tribe.

All blessings and honor be upon thee, Chloe N.

THIS JUST IN: Lovely Leopard Lads

Last Valentine’s Day, the Smithsonian Institution’s National Zoo welcomed two clouded leopard cubs. Yesterday the Zoo released a new set of “glamour shots” of the two boys. See more squee-worthy shots on their website.

Credit goes to the Smithsonian National Zoo.

Wakey-Wakey, Eggs and Bakey!

Any book with the phrase “rising body temperatures trigger arousal” is bound to be a page-turner, so when alert reader Arial R. sent us this, noting “I found this in a book at the library and thought it was oh-so-adorable,” that set our tails a-twitchin’.

Let us now examine the sleeping habits of our friend, the squirrel — who is, to put it charitably, not a morning person. (This will be on your final exam, by the way.)

Stays Possum-y — Even in Milk!

Cuteologists, we are presented today with a rarely-seen corollary to Rule of Cuteness #8 (If your furniture doubles as a meal, you’re cute), which states: If your bath doubles as a meal, you’re cute. And you can finish that all by yourself. No, really, I don’t seem to have an appetite for some reason, so you go ahead.

Photo credit: AnimalAdvocates. Submitted by Dave K.

Can I Tell You, I Love This Hand!

Is this a hand, or is this a hand? I’ve hugged a lot of hands in my time, but this hand is the most huggable hand I’ve ever hugged! How can I be so sure, I hear you asking? Because I know hands, my friend, and this — this right here is a hand!

Greetings from Camp

Dear Mom and Dad: I like Camp Wannasnorgleya. It is pretty fun, mostly. Some nights I get scared and wake up clinging to a counselor, but it’s mostly pretty fun.

Once they pry me off, we all have breakfast. The cook is named Mr. Walter. He only knows how to make macaroni and cheese. That’s OK, I like macaroni and cheese.

After breakfast, we do activities. My favorite is Computer Camp. My instructor is Mr. Russell, who knows a whole lot about computers even though a judge said he’s not allowed to use them anymore on account of how smart he is.

After a fun day, we get to have dinner. Tonight, I’m earning my cooking merit badge by helping Mr. Walter make macaroni and cheese.

Then we tell ghost stories around the campfire. Tonight’s story is “The One-Eyed, Peg-Legged Pirate Ghost with a Hook Hand Who Likes to Hide Under Campers’ Beds and Kidnap Them When They’re Sleeping, Especially Baby Baboons.”

You may remember this cutie from an earlier post. Thanks again, Jamin C.!

//UPDATE: By oh-so-popular request, here’s that picture of Jamin again! //

JaminAndMajoca

Synchronized Leecking

“… aaaaand one, two, three, leeck, two three, roll, two, three, leeck, two, three… C’mon, kid, keep up with me or you’ll never make the Olympic team!”

“Baby Pheebee says she can do the same thing as Big Brother Chandler, only better,” says Vickie T.

Motopup Mania Already!

And the motopups keep on rolling in! Awesome photographer Abigail Smigel not only spotted this pup wearing Barbie’s Dream Doggles™, but also caught a hint of Rule #5 (fisheye lens is cute) action. Vroom!

Any Word from My Lawyer?

“Ya gotta believe me, man, I didn’t do it! It was, ah, the one-armed man! Wait, no — it was the Illuminati! The Trilateral Commission? Space aliens? Bigfoot?”