Teddy Bears’ Coven

If you go down in the woods today you’re sure of a big surprise
If you go down in the woods today you’d better go in disguise
For every bear that ever there was will gather there for certain because
Today’s the day the Teddy Bears have their
summoning of the unearthly dark forces from the nether regions to do their evil bidding!

Via Reddit.


  1. Well, if this wasn’t a scrolldown Oh My Gaaaawd…

  2. You’re right! Not a picnic (or pic-a-nik) basket in sight! So frightening!

  3. fish eye no miko says:

    Well, they seem to be dancing around bear naked… (-:

  4. fleurdamour says:

    I guess that’s what they call sky clad.

  5. And widdershins.

  6. phred's mom says:

    Congrats, you beat Oakley to it.

  7. omg.
    the FEETS!!!

  8. Alice Shortcake says:

    I’d be more inclined to describe this as a folk dance, although admittedly there’s a fine line between folk dancing and devil worship.

  9. Looks like the Hokey-Pokey to me.

  10. At least that’s what thd Baptists next door tell me. :D

  11. 4leafclover says:

    It’s a 3-way sumo wrestling match!

  12. Martha in Washington says:

    I personally would welcome these Dark Overlords!

  13. Are you sure it isn’t a bear Hokey-Pokey?

  14. No Cuthulu reference?

  15. No tentacles visible. :P

  16. I read that as “testicles” gah!

  17. this didn’t get me into the mod lounge? Now I know the mad Gods are insane…

  18. “mod” Gods

  19. Surely Teddy Bears can not do evil bidding, they are Teddy Bears, Cute and Cuddly, yes capitalized.

  20. I’m pretty sure they are doing The Safety Dance….

  21. s s s s a a a a f f f f… You know the rest. : )

    Great post, NTMTOM! Another for that coffee table book we’re all eagerly awaiting.

  22. If the bears don’t dance they’re no bears of mine.

  23. Madly giggles…

  24. fleurdamour says:

    Teddy bears’ disco

  25. Bears Without Pants

  26. :)
    So the other day I heard the Star Wars disco version on the radio (!) and my brain added Bill Murray singing the lyrics….

  27. *mind boggles*

  28. The 3 Weird Sisters from Yellowstone’s summer stock production of “McBearth.”

  29. Double, double Yogi Bear’s in trouble;
    Fire burn, and caldron bubble!

  30. “Bear is foul and foul is bear . . .”

  31. Mingus's Mom says:

    Actually, that’s exactly how my high school folk dancing class in senior year looked. “Damnit, Anitra, you’re going the wrong way again!”

  32. lol. lol. good one. Poor, cute, ditzy Anitra….probly married for somebody’s money (5 times over), now sits around wondering if she maybe oughta slow down a bit on the trip mocha choka lacka maya.

  33. These are obviously quite vicious and evil bears. They must up to no good.

  34. fleurdamour says:

    This is where Stephen Colbert (Colbear?) dissolves into giggles.

  35. sorry, resident Latin teacher here, here to polish up NTMTOM’s rusty Latin grammar: bonum commune communitatis (the common good of the community)

  36. Isn’t that the chant from Hot Fuzz?

  37. fleurdamour says:

    I think this whole post is from The World’s End – Let’s Boo-Boo!

  38. What a terrible, unholy chant!

  39. who created that line, Julius ?

  40. Hooray for the “Hot Fuzz” reference!! NTMTOM for the win!!

  41. “If you go down in the woods today you’d better go in disguise” sounds like something from Eyes Wide Shut – Teddy Bears’ Kubrick?

  42. This just makes me think of the triplets in Disney’s Brave . Not the same type of bear but cute just the same . C:

  43. The wonderful caption reminds me of this quote from Good Omens, by Terry Pratchett & Neil Gaiman:

    Might NTMTOM have been inspired by that work?

  44. My quoted text seems to be invisible. Retyped, from Good Omens:
    “Oh, the grand old Duke of York
    He had ten thousand men
    He marched them up to the top of the hill
    And crushed all the nations of the world and brought them under the rule of Satan our master.”
    Yeah, that last line doesn’t quite scan.

  45. Does their evil bidding include tormenting Ranger Rick?

  46. Ow, my ribs! You peeps are killin’ me! :lol:

  47. Bears seem to always be doing interesting things in the woods when we are not watching.

  48. When a bear s***s in the woods, does it make a sound?

  49. Am I the only one on the intertubes that thinks this photo is ‘shopped?


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