As the great oaken door closed behind us, we stood before the Council of Catbeards

The first to speak was Nyquil of Eärewygge, the council elder. “They are but children,” sneered he, stroking his flowing white beard. “Are we to entrust our most sacred quest to the like of these quibullous squatlings?”

“Poppyrot and balderstuff!” roared Hieronymous Thalidomide. “Small they may be, but large in spirit, ’tis plain to see. Their valor shall make proud this council.”

“Besides,” added Gleevec Beaverbalm, “they’re just going to the delicatessen.”

Via Catbeards on Tumblr and also Reddit.



  1. fish eye no miko says:


    That totally looks like a word HP Lovecraft would use… (-:


    … Wow.

  2. lisaLASSIE says:

    Hmm “quibullous” made me think immediately of Lewis Carroll’s “Jabberwocky”.

    Plus: I’ve never seen these cat beards before. Is it a new craziness? I mean, craze?


  4. NTMTOM rides again! 🙂

  5. Coffee Cup says:

    I bet the cats at the North Pole use Santa for their beards.

  6. 260Oakley says:

    They hold their annual meeting at the fabulous castle owned by their fearsome overlord, Russian Bluebeard.

  7. NOMTOM keeeeeels me!

  8. Wow, just when you think the internet can’t hold any more cat stuff, we come up with something new.

  9. sabrina rose says:

    For sure! Hilarious and imaginative!!

  10. sabrina rose says:

    I love this concept. I had to look twice at the first photo to see what was happening. So clever, funny, and wry.

  11. I just realized there’s a whole CO tag for “human-animal hybrids“. ZOMG win. It’s chimerical. :mrgreen:

  12. First cat-breading, now cat beards, what next!?!? 😆

  13. JenDeyan says:

    I hate it when I miss the fancy new trends. Everyone’s catbearding but me…

  14. This is AWESOME ! I wanna be a hybrid ! (where’s my camera?)

  15. Ayeesha says:

    I did not know this was a thing! What would i do without this place to keep me up to date.

  16. He slays me.

  17. “This is madness!”
    ” No….THIS IS CUTE OVERLOAD!”” ( kicks Persian down the well)

  18. Three guesses as to who came up with that tag. 😉

  19. So fantastic. It’s been a while since we’ve had a really weird post so perfectly perfect for NTMTOM’s Big Brain. Hilarious.

  20. Clairedelune says:

    Sigghhh. I wish my hyper kitty could stay still in that position long enough to take a picture. Great , clever pictures NTMTOM!! I confess though that after the first giggles, I got lost in contemplation of those wonderful chins and puffy mouth pouches and the wondrous floofy belleh of Hieronymus Thalidomide.

  21. fleurdamour says:

    The Cry of Cathulu

  22. fleurdamour says:

    I will rule all seven kingdoms of Westpurros!

  23. fleurdamour says:

    The hipster beard thing has gone really far, hasn’t it?

  24. noellesbootcutkittenpants says:

    None of my cats are sufficiently fluffy! I cannot do this!

  25. Killer Klown says:

    I wonder if this will work for bunnies. I’d imagine it will be smaller… and small beards are always eviler. More evil. Something.

    So, yeah. Bunnies.

  26. Better than a neckbeard, I say.

  27. Theresa says:

    The Persian cat?? 😦

  28. Theresa says:

    Yeah, I’m thinking this bearding thing came about because of some hipster thumb-typo 😛

  29. Theresa says:

    PS Where is a good delicatessen around here anymore? I will reward thee with a share of the pastrami!

  30. You inhabit a strange world, Coffee Cup……. but I like it 😉

  31. clap clap clap

  32. And now you know you’ll have to try it! I’m gonna.

  33. I for one would love to see this attempted with a sphinx. Don’t let lack of floof hold you back from unleashing your inner Viking.

  34. 260Oakley says:

    Everyone looks good with a little hare on his chin.

  35. How do you do it Oakley???

  36. 1) I am DYING of laughter.
    2) I am DYING of NOMTOM’s hilarity.
    3) I am *DED*

  37. “I’m going on an adventure!” -Bilbo Baggins

  38. Coffee Cup says:

    The Persian messenger. It’s a 300 reference.


  40. Theresa says:

    I got that, actually. I guess my joke was feeble.

  41. à la Skippyjon Jones “‘No problema,’ said Poquito Tito. ‘You have a muy big brain.'”

  42. Hey, I thought it was downright clever, for what that’s worth.

  43. Drugs. Drugs of mass disruption.

  44. petless in Puddletown says:

    I’m waiting for a chance to use “quibbulous squatlings” in a sentence… I may have to wait a long while… plus nobody will get it besides me, but it wouldn’t be the first time.

  45. Are you actually petless? That’s just not right!

  46. Marjorie Berkowitz says:

    And SLAM! Another one for the coffee table book, which by now is a lot bigger than the old copy of the Encyclopaedia Britannica we used to have! Mike, How do you DO eet?

  47. You have made my day with this. Love Skippyjon Jones! (I have him on my desk at work :))

  48. Kathleen Blasco says:

    While I find catbeards adorable and charming, the use of drug names (Thalidomide and Gleevec) not so much. Thalidomide caused devastating birth defects in pregnant women, and Gleevec is used to treat a form of leukemia – not so funny. Sorry to be so serious, but I have family who has been affected by Thalidomide.

  49. Well there was a time I’d’ve guessed me… but I got ya.

  50. PWNED. 😉

  51. I like this idea, but I want to know more about why it’s a hipster typo in particular. I WILL TURN MY TYPO INTO AN INTERNET SENSATION. IRONY!

  52. Ah…hipster beardedness?

  53. 😆