Major Haversham Is Not Contented

The new upstairs maid was impossible, fumed the Major. His afternoon tea had been an iron ritual among the staff: Oolong, one sugar, in the East Westfordshire Hunt Club china cup, 3:47 sharp. And here it was, four o’clock, and no tea.

Outside his window, the clatter of automobiles replaced the clip-clop of the surrey, while the grating strains of some infernal racket called “jazz” emanated from the parlor downstairs. Anarchy, that’s what it was — a world gone mad.

The clock in the hall finished chiming. Still no tea. His eyelids grew heavy. He would speak to Mrs. Grimby tomorrow about the gramophone, he resolved, yawning. Tomorrow would see matters put right, and all… all would be… be well…

If you’re still reading, Sarah S., thanks for the pictures, and sorry it took so long.



  1. SlaveToCat says:

    It must be Grumpday, the beginning of another miserable work week of slaving away for the Fat Cats on Wall Street.

  2. Poor Major Haversham…would it cheer you to know you are the subject of one NTMTOM fabulous posts? No probably not, since it’s on that infernal and ridiculous thing called the “intertubes” or whatever the blasted thing is called!

  3. SlaveToCat says:

    Oh what a pretty kitty with his blankee. Most snoorgle until he is a happy purring kitty.

  4. emmberrann says:

    Such a patient Major!

  5. Must be one of Lord Grantham’s kin. Mr. Carson would never allow such an occurrence to…occur. If only Mr. Bates were here, he’d make it right!

  6. It’s not easy to maintain such high standards in an ever changing world, but some things are just not to be tolerated!

  7. So kitteh lives in Downton Tabby?

  8. Tune in for the next episode of Downton Tabby.

  9. Jinx, Saffron. You owe me a diet Coke!

  10. 😀 😀
    I am sending you a diet Coke right now….

  11. He looks so cozy!

  12. warrior rabbit says:

    Icanhascheezburger made a Downton Tabby shirt! I didn’t buy it, though.

  13. Smallthunder says:

    Sugar in one’s oolong? Horrors!
    Methinks the Major meant his Earl Grey/Gray.
    (What? No cream?)

  14. fleurdamour says:

    Major Tomcat is being a big girl’s blouse about it.

  15. Awwww Major Haversham…you’re adorable. Come to my place, we’ll have a spot of tea and some scones. 🙂

  16. NTMTOM channelling his inner C. Aubrey Smith!

  17. FOR EVERYBODY above,
    INCLUDING WR, mambear, Saffron and The Oak:

  18. One minor major.

  19. Cream in one’s Earl Grey? Perish the thought!
    Perhaps a little milk.
    ( ;D )

  20. What a fabulous cat! And the color coordination is amazing.

  21. noellesbootcutkittenpants says:

    Crochet geek comment: I have that blankie pattern! And I recognize the yarn. Gorgeous cat, too.

  22. This cat is so ugly that it’s adorable. Is that even possible? It reminds me of Crookshanks – Harry Potter.

  23. I will help you with the snorgling, SlaveToCat 😀

  24. great, now I want to set up a tea with the dowager.

    they can both complain about those unseemly modern fashions, those infernal motorvehicles, the scandal of the new maid cycling around the village, the rector’s new “american” style moustache and the dangerous vapors from the new-fangled lighting in the dining room.

    problem is, that would require the major to step out side of his manor, which he hasn’t done since he returned from the war and his injury with a pack mule and the vice-admiral’s daughter.

  25. Harmony w/cats says:

    Another crochet geek here, and I was just wondering on where to find that pattern and the yarn looks so nice and soft. 😀

  26. vice-admiral’s daughter? Do tell!

  27. smellsmeller says:

    Reeeeallly, I mean REEEEEEAAALLLY, nice work! Just had to let you know… love your writing! I see that most of the comments are on the cat and the blanket and thought you deserved kudos on your creativity. So there ya go, hope you see this.