Cute Overload Crazy Caption Contest®

This one just begs for a “Goodbye Mr. Bond” post headline—we’ve got 007 on the brain cuz of the new movie. But this time it’s you—you our Devoted Readers, who will provide the headline!

Here’s the plan: have at it in the comments—suggest a terrific headline for this guy and we’ll pick a winner and that person will get a 2013 Cute Overload Calendar of their choice!

The winner will be announced TONIGHT at 9PM PT. GO!!!

//////////////////UPDATE!!! And our winner is://////////////////

“Do you expect me to talk?”

“No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to switch to Geico!”

Joanna Martinez, send us your info to! Make sure you choose which format calendar you want! Thanks to all for the incredibuhls submissions!

Photo by Crew, Jaycrew.



  1. “Yes, Mr Bond, you are a master of many skills but can you hold your own feet?”

  2. Gotta love it when your feet can double as armrests!

  3. Evelyn Tan says:

    “Proof that yoga practice DOES result in being able to touch your toes!”

  4. “Ah yes, my new ergonomic chair is a complete success!”

  5. April Hamalainen says:

    You’re fired!!

  6. “Why yes, I am just happy to see you”

  7. “Give it to me straight Doc, is this normal?”

  8. Nugz_the_Kat says:

    “There be no need to skin me for a leather armchair. Why, I already AM one!”

  9. “And the fact that I provide service with a smile AND can do these calming yoga moves is the reason you should hire me to be the spokesperson for Geico instead of that other guy. Namaste.”

  10. LIzard? Lizard you say? You MAY live to regret that comment Mr. Bond!

  11. “No more barrels for me!” -Klobber, Donkey Kong Country

  12. Interesting – instead of rubbing his “hands” together with villainous glee, he is rubbing his front feet and back feet together. A new level of villainous expression!!

  13. Happy baby pose is relaxing? Yeah Right…

  14. “Welcome to the lizarding world, Mr. Bond. Very few live to tell tales about it.”

  15. Bill Donnenberg says:

    No, Mr. Bond, I am not dangerous at all.

  16. “So…you’ve come to me for a little favor, have you? How may I assist you?”

  17. I’m handing out butt kickings and lollipops. And I’m all out of lollipops.

  18. Stressfactor says:

    From this angle it looks kind of like a baby aligator! : o

  19. Cat, shmat, go lizard.

  20. “All that yoga practice DOES result in being able to touch my toes!”

  21. yoga is my bliss

  22. “You told me we were going to the vet just for a checkup.”

  23. “Downward dog”?! Try “scheming lizard”!

  24. Unless you are the possessor of the Gold Finger, Mr. Bond, do not scritch my tummy

  25. I’m a member of SPECTRE, The Special Extremely Cute and Tewtelly Redonkulous Earwormologist. And I expect you to squeee Mr. Bond.

  26. 260Oakley says:

    Little known fact: Liz’ Taylor appeared as a Bond girl in “Liz’ and Let Die.”

  27. “James Bond is a very rare breed… but not nearly so rare as I!”

  28. “New Yoga Position: Cranked Lizzie Palmasan”

  29. You think I am at your mercy, Mr. Bond. I look so vulnerable and exposed. But this only looks like a tail. It’s actually a nuclear-powered missile launcher. One press of this footpad and… goodbye, Mr. Bond…

  30. dawnkeyotie says:

    “And then I was like… check out THESE abs! Crunches, baby!”

  31. 260Oakley says:

    “The Geico gecko’s insurance policy just ran out.”

  32. ZeppthePug says:


    Harry got a snowy owl, Hermione got that smart cat (woulda thought that was an oxymoron, dontcha know), Ron got a mangy rat/serial killer- heck, even Neville got a toad! What do I get? A hand. Not even an aerodyn- errr, ergodynam- uh, chiropractically sound hand. HOW am I supposed to do my homework on this thing?! All the other kids are going to laugh at me.”

  33. You should see the flip side.

  34. Sir Snorfsalot says:

    Mr Bond: Why Dr Lizard what a big mouth you have!
    Dr L : MWA HA HA, Why yesss yesss Mr Bond – all the better for putting leeepstick on…

  35. Assuming crash position for “Skyfall”

  36. ‘Why, I don’t expect you to talk, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die!’

  37. My privacy tail needs a privacy tail.

  38. Yessss, yessss hoomin. This ees the perfect spot to see all that ees mine! Now. where is the button for the recliner?

  39. I just keep thinking of this guy petting a really tiny, fluffy white kitty. “No Mr. Bond, I expect you to squee.”

  40. “Now do EXACTLY as I say…and no one will get hurt!”

  41. fleurdamour says:

    Prepare for DEFEET, Mr. Bond! Bwahahahaha!

  42. ….And that is how you play patty-cake.

  43. ping pong says:

    fifteen minutes can save you fifteen percent or more off car insurance.

  44. fleurdamour says:

    Ermahgerd, ert’s ern ergernermic lerzerd!

  45. sueluvsblue says:

    I call this “upward facing lizard” …

  46. “Ve haf vays of making you talk!”

  47. Are you looking at my tail!? So rude. I’m up here.

  48. Marty's Mom says:

    So, Bob. Tell me exactly what it is that you do for the company. MMmmmmk?

  49. Bond’s Nemesis Ernst Stavro Hanheld.

  50. “Next time, Gadget- NEXT TIIIME!”

  51. I see Dr. Evil saying: “Mini-Me, no, we don’t gnaw on our kitty.Leave Mr. Bigglesworth alone. Just love him, stroke him.”

  52. “No, Mr. Bond … I expect you to die!”

  53. “Say hello to my leetle friend.”

  54. “Very funny, Mr. Bond. Now click your new inkpen again and turn me back. We have work to do!” — Q

  55. Yes my dear, just a leetle closer….

  56. “I am the Lizard King, and, as you can see, I can do anything.”

  57. JustAnotherHeather says:

    Downward dog ain’t got nothing on a Gecko Gyro!

  58. “Bring me Solo and the Wookiee. They will all suffer for this outrage”
    Jabba the Hutt

  59. I guess this is the end of you Mr. Bond

  60. weasel wardancer says:

    I’m ready for my clean diaper now. don’t forget the baby powder!

  61. bookmonstercats says:

    Excellent, Ms Oakley. I expect you to win!!

  62. No, really! Pull my tail!

  63. “You see something you like?”

  64. “It’s neither an armrest nor footrest, Mr. Bond–I’ve just launched the missile from my cleverly disguised foot pad…”

  65. P. Osgood says:

    “No, Mrs. Bond, I expect you to sigh!”

  66. “License to Lounge (Lizard)”

  67. “Reptilio-palmy”

  68. Joanna Martinez says:

    “Do you expect me to talk?”
    “No, Mr. Bond, I expect you to switch to Geico!”

  69. Soon, Princess Leia, I will hold you in MY hand…

  70. *in gravel-ly nasal voice* Hello Wazowski. I see you didn’t file your paperwork last night. Give me a massage and we’ll call it even. For once.

  71. Now, make me a sandwich. Extra lettuce.

  72. Have you ever snorgled a lizard? Your training will tell you that when the cute kicks in, you should compensate… but part of you isn’t going to believe the training because this snorgle is personal. Take a deep breath, you only need a good aim at the axis of snorgling. Make it count.

    …oh a headline you say? Then definitely “No Mr Bond, I expect you to snorgle”

  73. See?? I told you I could touch my toes! But nooooo, you didn’t want to believe me… Well here, here I say!!

  74. Mary (the first) says:

    Wait .. you confused me at “devoted readers”. Who are you talking to??

  75. Yes, the resemblance to this Jabba Hut you seek is uncanny, Mr. Bond, but I am not he.

  76. [not a Bond entry] Hoy macks — Lizzie looks like a snake who swallowed an human, whole, and the arms and legs are still outstretched. eeewwwww.

  77. No Mr. Bond, I expect you to save up to 30 percent on your car insurance — and from what I have seen, you can use a good insurance carrier.

  78. “I shall let you love me as you carry out my plan for world domination”

  79. Can’t we talk later? I’m in the middle of my daily yoga routine.

  80. That’s it, keep watching may tail and you fall slowly into a trance.

  81. Like!

  82. C’mon! C’mon!! C’MON!!!

    These ittew piddies ain’t gonna count THEMSELVES.

  83. Cindy Lind says:

    You wanna talk! Ok, let’s talk.

  84. S. Aboul-Hosn says:

    Beware, Mr. Bond, I have Bette Death Ray eyes.

  85. Alex Baroutsos says:

    Why hello my precious…

  86. “What? You can’t touch your hands to your feet? Stop starring”

  87. Good evening Mr. Bond. Remain still. I’ll take care of that fly for you.

  88. Beth Shrout says:

    Next time, don’t forget the crickets!

  89. Lookin’ so fly. Giving myself double hi-fives.

  90. Lucies Mom says:

    Bond: “No, ma’am, I’m with the economy tour.”

    from Octopussy

  91. I, on the other hand (mwahaha), have a license to chill

  92. From my throne of human hand, I shall rule you all!

  93. Oh, yeah?!? Well…. define cute!

  94. Well Mr. Bond, it seems your scheme to ruin my plans for WORLD DOMINATION have been soiled. Now, prepare to be tortured by my tail of torment! *evil laugh*

  95. Have I got a tale for you!

  96. What do you mean, relax and push? Give me my damn epidural!!

  97. My command is your wish, peasant!

  98. I’m more of a slippery lizard than you, Mister Bond!

  99. 9 hours to go! These are great! Keep it going! Everyone likes the “Do you expect me to talk” line from Goldfinger- I like this one from Dr. No:
    M: When do you sleep, 007?
    Bond: Never on the Firm’s time, sir.

  100. Megumi's Mom says:

    Bwahahaha! Now that I have trained my human minion,
    the WORLD is MINE, MINE!!!!! Bwahahahahaha!

  101. Megumi's Mom says:

    … Same as we do everynight, Pinky, Try to TAKE OVER THE WORLD…..

  102. The pieces are falling into place. Soon, the world will know the full scope of my plans.

  103. “You evil witch…NOW CHANGE ME BACK!”

  104. Joni Wellmam says:

    I’m ready for my checkup!

    Sent from my iPhone

  105. “Yes I, Auric Lizardfinger, will take over the world…and by the time you finish filling out the Geico Insurance paperwork in triplicate, you Mr. Bond will be helpless to stop me….MWWWAAAAHAAAHAAAHAAAAA!”

  106. Velcome… I haf been… Expecting you…

  107. In an exclusive interview on tonight’s show, Dr. Skeeze describes his patented new full-body hair removal procedure. “It’s perfectly safe and almost painless!”

  108. Loretta Eck says:

    I’d like to see you hold both feet in your hands and smile at the same time!

  109. “I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse”

  110. Dry flytini. Wait – three measures of fruit flies, one of houseflies; half a measure of dragonflies. Shake it over ice, and add a butterfly.

  111. never mind says:

    The new palmtop – smart, flexible and user-friendly. Comes in green with spots for the perfect camouflage.

  112. Holly in MS says:

    Meester Bond,I will DEESTROY you!…as soon as I give myself a hand/foot massage (it’s a little complicated…but, you see, my feet look like little hands)…

  113. Julz again says:

    Now the whole world will know that you died scratching my tail.

  114. 260Oakley says:

    Dr. Toe

  115. 260Oakley says:

    Scene from “Her Majesty’s Secret Cervix.”

    (I beg everyone’s pardon, but I could not help myself.)

  116. “Well okay take the photo…but this better not ever find its way to the internet!”

  117. Would’ya Look at this six-pack. I do nothing but eat bugs and smoke a pack a week.

  118. I am NOT the Geico gecko!

  119. FYI, Geico says “save up to 15% or more on car insurance” not 30%. Just sayin’.

  120. Jabba the Hut to Mr. Bond: Yes, Mr. Bond, I’m sorry but you will have to die! But I just can’t get over how these Spanx really work.

  121. hatlady07 says:

    Jabba the Hut to 007….Yes, Mr. Bond you will have to die but first I must ask you…Don’t you think these Spanx make me look great?

  122. Forget about Geico…I’m into Girlco, Sweetie!

  123. Don’t vorry Mr. Bond, vee haf vayz of makeen you tok!!

  124. Oops, this is a double post! Already posted this under ‘Evelyn Tan’, but it wasn’t coming up so I thought I’d try again. Please ignore this! 🙂

  125. Send in the fem-BOTS!!!

  126. fleurdamour says:

    Love it!!

  127. fleurdamour says:

    Lizard Let Die
    Lizard to Kill
    The Lizard Daylights
    Casino Reptile

  128. Lizard: Hi! I’m Plenty.
    Bond: But of course you are.
    Lizard: Plenty O’Tail
    Bond: Names after your father perhaps?


  130. phred's mom says:

    S’all right, Oak. Too funny.

  131. phred's mom says:

    shaken, NOT stirred.

  132. S. Belfus says:

    How do like my six pack?

  133. “Yes, my cousin works for Geico. What about it? You wanna make something of it?”

  134. This chair doesn’t feel like it has lumbar support!

  135. It might look like I’m in the palm of your hand, but you’re really in the palm of my hand!

  136. Maddex Rose says:

    Now, Mr. Bond, lets get down to business. How again does this “secret agent” thing work?

  137. All these sit ups flattened my abs, but now my tail is fat.

  138. Vicarious_penguin says:

    Hey,…does this tail make my head look big?

  139. *snerk*

  140. Mischief Girl says:

    I know, Mr. Bond, it appears you’ve got me in the palm of your hand, but I’ve actually got you in the palm…oh, hmmmm, it seems those are my… well, Mr. Bond, you will have to Die Another Day!

  141. You’re eyes are getting heavy, you are getting sleepier and sleepier. Now you will give me all the crickets and meal worms I desire. You will take me for daily walks and you will find me a sexy little lizard girlfriend. When you awake you will remember none of this conversation. *snap*

  142. “My job is not to worry about those people, I’ll never convince them they should take personal responsibility and care for their lives.”

  143. nah. lizard’s not nearly slimy enough to say something like that. 😉

  144. “Say ‘Hello’ to my little friends!”

  145. A lizard in the hand is worth two in the… wait is that a fern back there?

  146. victoreia says:

    *stifled giggles*

  147. victoreia says:


  148. victoreia says:

    “Send in…….the NUNS!!”

    (Points if you get the reference!)