It’s What Kitty Would Have Wanted

Here lies kitty’s toebeans
Pink pads with toehawk in-betweens
Got their start climbing jeans.

Next, kitty was going up screens
And the tops of holiday evergreens
Kitty was ready for bigger sightseein’s.

Soon as kitty was in his teens
Kitty ran off to join the Marines
But toehawks aren’t for cleaning latrines.

So kitty jumped ship to chase sardines
Kitty ate ’em up to smithereens
Kinda makes toehawks hard to cleans.

Traveling was in kitty’s genes
Showing kitty’s toehawks to kings and queens
Having so much fun, it’s lucky if kitty remembered to get vaccines.

Kitty was last seen in the Caribbeans
On the beach carving coconut figurines
Riding off into the sunset in kitty limousines.

The rest of kitty is off your screens
Do not be sad, don’t make any scenes
Just imagine a kitty of your dreams.

All we have is kitty’s little mitteens
Everybody knows what that means!
Mmmmm, delicious, yummy, peenk toebean cuisine!

Toe-tally padular, Jill M.!




  2. *slow claps*

  3. hmstracylee says:

    risking moderaysche to say Holy Crap Look At That ‘Hawk!!

  4. Pure Poetry…it should go into a CuteOverload poetry book. THEY SHOULD TOTALLY DO THAT

  5. noellesbootcutkittenpants says:

    Excuse me, I’ve got a hair in my mouf. *ppth ppth*

  6. I second that.

  7. Mary (the first) says:


  8. *gasp* *sputter*

  9. This reminds me of my uncle who joined the Coast Guard then found out he would be on a ship,then went missing for a week!He’s fine now…he said I can’t swim.

  10. rescue gal says:

    That is one of the worlds finest toe-hawks!

  11. Don’t think I’ve ever seen a cat with fluff DOWN THERE. Why the heck would they? Wouldn’t that make walking, jumping, etc more difficult when that hair would get in the way?

  12. Fird Birfle says:

    I wonder *WHY* Noelegy/ noellesbootcutkittenpants would have hairs in her mouth.

    I also wonder, whether they *might be* kitty-hairs????


  13. Fird Birfle says:

    seems a dam* good reason, to “bail” 😉

  14. Fird Birfle says:

    No, no, Kar. See, it’s JUST LIKE the European royalty in the 1700’s/ 1800’s..
    It just provides new purposes for “the help” — aka us hoomans —
    to do those things FOR les kittayes.

  15. Fird Birfle says:

    Rousing, sincere, heartfelt standing “O” to pyrit’s clevaire wordsmithing.

    And for the cat, too 🙂

  16. Anyone know what’s in-betweens? 😛

  17. Do we serve him up in nice tureens?

  18. Could it be nobody’s got bleens? 😛

  19. See the resemblance to wolverines?

  20. This toefloof has me in smithereens!

  21. Ali-Baba says:

    Would you like a tangerine? 😉

  22. scarletgunn says:

    my cat totally owns those toehawks. hers are way longer and fluffer, but do not come with a catchy jingle.

  23. toehawk! ❤

  24. Do it! Do it! Do it!

  25. Peenk toebean cuisine!!
    That line will go down in history!!

  26. Heeeheehee!

  27. I think you’d better get right on that, Scarletgunn. 😛

  28. Looks like Wilford Brimley!

  29. Those are some epic toehawks. My fluffy girl kitty has the same, but she tends to give me the stink-eye when I insist on playing with her feet.

  30. scarletgunn says:

    actually, long haired cats have them because it makes their paws into tiny snowshoes, providing grip on ice and snow and helps them stay warm in cold weather.

  31. noellesbootcutkittenpants says:

    Ha! I see what you did there.

    Around my house, cat hair is a condiment. Well, not really, but it does make up a percentage of the atmosphere. Any time I give away a crochet creation (I’ve been doing a lot of baby blankets lately) I have to pick out the kitty hair that’s been lovingly woven into the piece. ♥

  32. noellesbootcutkittenpants says:

    Come Josephine, in my flying machine.

  33. such a clever writer – she always makes me smile.

  34. Doggie pads just never seem
    Quite so pink and so pristine.
    She must have a clean machine.
    Should be in a magazine.

  35. numnumnums says:

    mmm…. delicious toebeans…. love those!

  36. ashagato says:

    OMG Pyrit I totally cracked up throughout your entire briiliant poem!
    one of my all-time faves! 🙂

  37. Our cat, Dooley, has long and fluffy toehawks, too, scarletgunn 😀