Real Vikings Don’t Need Helmets

Goats, the original baaaad boys, have a long and proud and beard-y history of raiding, sacking, looting, pillaging, and plundering other people’s property. And marauding, don’t forget marauding.

When the goating gets tough, the tough get goating, kyz



  1. “Real Vikings don’t need helmets.” Yeah, real Vikings have HORNS GROWING OUT OF THEIR HEADS!!??? 😯

  2. Sir Goaterson von Largerhorn looks quite dapper in his spats.

  3. My ancestors were Vikings, does that mean I’ll eventually grow horns and a beard???

  4. Well…who’s that trip-trap-tripping over my bridge?

  5. Cambridge Rat Mom says:

    Isn’t he just the quintessential billy goat from Three Billy Goats Gruff?

  6. Sweet!

  7. Kari Callin says:

    I am a goat on the edge! See that look in my eye?! Go ahead and take your best shot, Mr. This-is my-bridge-so-keep-the-tromping down! I’ll make as much noise as I want and you’ll count yourself lucky I don’t place these horns where the sun don’t shine, ‘kay?! ‘kay!

  8. So handsome!

  9. Kristen S. says:

    OH! Such fierceness atop such stubbular legs!

  10. It’s Tanngnjóstr!!!

  11. For the same reason they don’t need helmets, real vikings don’t need battering rams. 😀

    Gotta love those distinguished white streaks in the beard (plus stylin’ spats, as tracylee pointed out). And such a robust figure — he’s almost perfectly cube-shaped!

  12. Pygmy Goat-daddy! Ewe slay me. I dare not even try to trot out ideas of a clever pun to clove Oakley’s masterfulness.

  13. Fird Birfle says:


    Both Sophisticated AND demure, TOO !!!!!

  14. dude. look at the head size to foot size ration. just. look at it.

  15. Trying to horn in on my territory, are ya’? 😉

  16. i’m stuck on the horn size to leg size ratio…whoah…

  17. zz top goat!

  18. I think maybe the legs only look stubbular cause of the long hair.

  19. Mr. Handsome Goatersons is the epitome of goat. He is beyond praise or modesty. He IS.

  20. Martha in Washington says:

    Is it wrong that I want him snuggled up on my lap?

  21. *snerk*

  22. Rachel of Cyberia says:

    Only if you’re a woman.

  23. Cute little guy is about to ram some shins.

  24. Then you have to try to dodge ram, although if you’re quick enough, they will ram butt….

  25. cellarmouse says:

    ooohh…that’s tough!…funny but…”funny butt? i don’t have a funny butt!”

  26. bookmonstercats says:


  27. Fird Birfle says:

    YAY, seconded!!!

  28. And so fluffily well groomed.

  29. We can tell by the way your clutch your pearls.

  30. *ratio*
    not ration. that would make no sense.

  31. cellarmouse says:
  32. Glad we got that settled. 😉

  33. old goatlady says:

    Umm, I’m not sure if you realize, but the male of the species have a, shall we say, certain “eau de male goatiness” about them? Not something you really want to snuggle up to, unless you want to wash all of your clothes and take a shower right afterwards.

  34. old goatlady says:

    I tried to be careful to avoid the mod lounge – not careful enough I guess! Sorry, I just meant they can smell bad!!!

  35. old goatlady says:

    I have now made it into the mod lounge twice in a row, I think I’m done now. :/

  36. hey, why so glum? get outta here and go mingle a bit!

  37. LisaLassie says:

    Clever indeed.

  38. A worthy beast.

  39. HAW!

  40. Not only do they stink, but they try really hard to stink, and I’ll just leave that to your imagination.

    Wethers, on the other hand, are just delightful.

  41. The thing is, if you bend over around them, they will butt you in the butt. Why, it’s almost as if they’re read and watched all those cartoons about goats . . . 🙄

  42. Why try to avoid the mod lounge? Nobody else does! 😀

  43. Fird Birfle says:

    ok Theresa. I’ll bite. I’ll admit that a word “wether” is entirely new to my vocabulary adventures. So what’s that? Izzit a terme scientifique for “female goat” or ” s’thing completely different”??

  44. Fird Birfle says:


  45. I was curious about that, too, FB, mainly because a neighboring town here is called “Wethersfield.” According to Wiktionary, ‘wethers” are male goat whose family jewels have been removed. So I guess I live near a field of kass-trated goats. 😯

  46. I was thinking more in terms of Thor’s chariot-goats (the Grinder, specifically), as that magnificent member of the Capra family displays the powerful beauty and fierce aplomb necessary to associate with the Nordic gods…

    But the Yugioh card works too…!

  47. He is cute and he may even want to cuddle but I prefer ewe, dear. Nanny goats smell much nicer. My sister had a got named Priscilla who was sweet and followed her around.

    BTW Scandinavians of the Viking era never actually wore helmets with horns on them. There are helmets with horns from that area but most examples predate the viking era and were not used by warriors. Horns made great hand holds for the other guy who wanted to kill you. The Horned helmets from pre-Viking days were most likely ceremonial rather than battlefield chic,
    And if you ever want a good laugh check out the way the viking guys wore their hair.

    I read way too much medieval history.

  48. old goatlady says:

    Heh! I’ve noticed that! It does seem like the lounge is the “happenin’ place”, man!

  49. old goatlady says:

    kimmaroo – Wethersfield?! That sounds so cute, I’m picturing frolicking, happy goats everywhere!

  50. Linky to Viking hair styles, pleasee?

  51. Oh dear all I have are books. I will try to find the hairstyle that cracks me up online.
    So you can see it.