In a shocking development, Reginald Van Snord, believed to have been accidentally shot, stabbed, poisoned, drowned, impaled, electrocuted, decapitated, poisoned again, and eaten by crocodiles which were in turn eaten by piranhas, returns to reclaim his family’s vast median-strip real estate holdings.
Meanwhile, Sheila Crackleflacker, under pressure from the Amish Mafia to repay her gambling debts, agrees to rent her vital organs for scientific experiments.
And a tearful Emma Bunnyslipper bravely confronts Blake Drake, the cad who savagely chewed Emma’s twin sister Abigail in Tangiers.
This is Eloise. She is a Chihuahua puppyluv. Shot by Christy @ www.BonBonChihuahuas.com
OMG!! Run for your life, Emma! (But don’t go to Tangiers)
Never mind Emma! What about Sheila? (“rent her organs” *snicker*)
Oh, is *that* what they’re calling it these days??
The “Amish Mafia” is what officially slayed me. I am now rolling around on the floor, wishing I had put son my Depends before chackong out CO!
Does make typing awkward, doesn’t it.
yeah, that’s my story, and I’m sticking to it!!!
@Wend: AHA! That may be your story, but is it sticking to You???
it was aww a dweam
*snicker* Wasn’t that the lamest excuse for a come-back?
Yeah but we got to see Patrick Duffy in the buff, so …
You saw Duffy in the buff? I saw Buffy in the duff.
I saw the Man from Atlantis, but then I’m old.
@kar: That was my little sister’s favorite show! (Yeah, I’m old, too……)
Reginald Van Snord sounds like Rasputin.
And with a surprisingly similar demise.
“How could? It was easy. Let me show you.” (omnomnomnomnom)
That’s the funniest thing I’ve read in months! It’s a good thing I had already finished my coffee or it would have come shooting out my nose!
Mike — on which network does “Guiding Leash” air? Animal Planet??
I’m on the edge of my seat, to watch the next episode and I don’t know to which
channel to tune in!!!
(Actually, I think that would be delightful if such did broadcast there)
You…. you… mean …. IT MIGHT NOT REALLY be a proper TV soap opera??? Gaaaah!!!111!!!!
1. It needs to be. Cue Cuteevee. Meg producing, NOMTOM writing, Sharpy and Theo editing, Teresa arranging distribution…. I can see it all…..
2. I want spotty bunny slippers.
3. I want Eloise as the leading lady (I’ll give her back, once she’s been snorgled).
ditto all three bullet points.
But, espesh # 2 !!!
I was gonna go with “espech # 3″!!!!1!1!!!!
Her name is Eloise?!! I am not normally for dogs having people names but that is just so gosh darn adorable!!!! It suites her to a T!!
i forgive the pup. emma’s twin sister was a bitch anyway.
bu –
Win.
Dramatic music: bun bum BUN!!
Quiet now. Mama is watching her stories.
+1 internet.
I just did one of those silent “Awr” faces, it happens when I see something so cute, no sound can be made. A little tear also appears in each eye and I proceed to show everyone in the house!
Blake was jealous of Abigail’s relationship with his arch-enemy, Dr. Scholls.
I agree, 260O. Dr Scholls is a heel.
heh heh “arch-enemy”
*cash register bells ring*
Blake probably felt Dr. Scholl made her toe the line, and had no sole.
BWAHAHAHA!
She should definitely give him the boot.
Oooh, things might get Uggly after that.
*snort*
That staring contest is going to last forever.
and ten years later, Marlena is still possessed by the devil and Hope has come back from teh ded again?! Oh, she was ded from the Cute.. I see…
(don’t worry, happens all the time)
But what about Sophronia Bracegirdle?
The secretary at my elementary school was named Sophronia. True story!
Prolly out to lunch with Fionnulla Sandwich, yes, of THOSE Sandwiches, and no. P.B. & J. are NOT related, thank you very much!
I am so changing my name to Sheila Crackleflacker. And everywhere I go I will have people page me over the intercom.
At minimum, when you have to leave your name at a restaurant, don’t tell your real name. Tell them “Crackleflacker” or whatever. (Used to have a friend who would tell them “Wilde” because he liked “Wilde party of four”… )
I have a friend who would always give them “Donner” for the last name at restaurants. Invariably, when the hostess called “Donner Party…” he would crack himself up. Evidently this joke never got old to him.
This comment made me laugh so hard (if silently) , I had tears in my eyes! Your friend must be quite a cut-up! *snrking*
LOL!
“Amish Mafia”–snort! Next thing you know, the Quakers will have a mafia, too.
Eloise is adorable, and I need to get me a pair of polka dot bunny slippers.
Shhh! They’ll hear you! *shifty eyes*
Oh what a fat little pumkin. She can come to my house and intimidate my footwear anytime. Oops I don’t have bunny slippers. Will a stripy toe-sock do?
“Hi there! You must be new around here! My name is Eloise, what’s yours?”
” ”
“Not much of a talker, are you?”
Entirely enjoyable bit !!!
wah-wah sez yr feetsies steenk and teh bunny slipper is totally not amused. Stand by for the next episode of “General Horsepital,” followed by yet another day of “As the Stomach Turns” with yr fav guest animal voice overs
And the old and the chestless!!!!
First of all Eloise .. is adorable..
second of all
OMG POLKADOT BUNNY SLIPPERS! Soooooo cute.
Abigail should have known better than to go to Tangier with Blake the snake Drake.
omg, I want to kees that leetle forehayd! The puppeh, not the bunneh slipper.
I think that’s actually a fivehead.
Puppy vs Slipper.
My vote is on the pup.
Reginald? Or Rasputin.
Hey, you gotta be careful with the Amish. They just indicted a bunch of folks in Ohio for assault. Knocked on a guy’s door and when he came out they grabbed him and forcibly removed his beard. They then ran away on their push scooters.
It’s funny because it’s true!
Seriously, can you imagine the police chase with horse and buggies? Could end it with a bunch of carrots and apples rather than nail strips and shooting out the tires.
I’m still working on “forcibly removed his beard”. Did they, you know, shave it, or just kind of pull it off?
Scissors I think. They’re a radical splinter group/cult. I know, I know.
“Radical group” and “Amish” in the same sentence just doesn’t compute……
(Just goes to show, us “English” have already corrupted them!)
Perhaps they used . . . electric clippers!!! http://www.dramabutton.com/
I was wondering that myself. I can’t believe I missed that story in the news…
*stunned silence*
This entire thread is so enjoyable, espeshully starting out with NTMTOM’s mad genius writing skillz and ever-awesome imagination!
Thanks all peeps for giggles and snorts of mirth!!!
…..
BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!1!1!!!!!1!!!!!1!!!
*staggers away, giggling madly*
*walks around in the zig-zig patterns, behind victoreia, with a small bed mattress, in case she suddenly collapses, or trips on the leg of the coffee table….*
There seems to be a huge market for polka-dot bunny slippers here. If Christy knows where we can get some, please tell us!
We meet at last!
Ack! Does Eloise live in a hotel too?! Such a cutie!
I hope hope hope hope this doggie is named after THAT Eloise!
accidentally shot, stabbed, poisoned, drowned, impaled, electrocuted, decapitated, poisoned again, and eaten by crocodiles which were in turn eaten by piranhas
-Talk about a bad day.
probably a monday…
Typical day in the law. And that’s just your colleagues.
Tough crowd.
And in a stunning upset, Susan Poochi has once again lost out on winning the Dogtime Emmy Award for Best Actress to upstart Sheila Crackleflacker. One of the Academy members, in a confidential interview, remarked that Susan Poochi was growing long in the tooth and Sheila’s organ rental scheme was fresh and exciting, exclaiming, “Sadly, Ms. Poochi’s repertoire has become somewhat stale. I guess it’s true that you can’t teach an old dog new tricks.”
Miss Poochi, ever the professional, demurred, “Well, it was an honor to just have been NOMinated.”
And finally:
1. Eloise is ridiculously adorable.
2. NTMTOM is ridiculously brilliant. Standing O.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!11!!!!!!!!!!1!!!
Hey, Mike, I didn’t know you were taking understudies! Where do I sign up?
Aw thanks for throwing me a bone, Victoreia!
Every time I come back to this page, I read the opening section as “accidentally shot”, “accidentally poisoned”, “accidentally decapitated”, and so on. Not only was poor Reginald subject to so much abuse, but they were all accidents! Whoever inflicted all that harm on him didn’t really mean to do it, which makes the pain that much worse!
I’ve spent too much time writing and editing, I think. I just hope that Emma doesn’t get accidentally nommed!
¿Por QUE?
I’m looking for Dr. Lipschwitz, myself.
Aren’t we ALL, Theresa???
Aren’t we all …..
Having an identical twin seems like much less of a stretch if you’re a member of the Bunnyslipper family.
If I HOP, will you Hop?
“You know it’s not personal, right?”
Think you’re pretty cute, doncha.
ooooo that’s a nice capshon fer this
Geeeee, I don’t think I can finish another bunny slipper…..(burp)
*hands Tim an Alka-Seltzer*
Really, really cute and sweet pup. Such concentration to figure out what is this “animal” in front of me, huh??
thats not a bunny slipper. Its a boo boo bunny. Ive been in boo boo bunny assembly lines, I know a boo boo bunny when I see one.