As I descended into the dungeon labyrinth, a foul odor assaulted my senses, the stench of freshly rotting corpses mingled with the dank mold of eons, and a hint of vanilla. I whispered the chant the elders had taught me — tarath n’Ghol nabisco blayvin — and held aloft the Divine Eggplant of Protection.
And there, as foretold, was the ancient basket, wherein lay a horror so wretched that the elders could not speak its name without making a “hlgrrlph” sound. I had hoped to take it asleep, but was too late; the demonic eyes glowed from within. It had seen me.
Tara N. confesses: “I think that deep down in, Guinnie knows she needs baskethab, but she’s not quite willing to admit it yet.”
I iz scared!
*runs to laundry basket holding a Divine Eggplant of Protection*
Rats, no demon.
Years ago, on the “Go Fug Yourself” website, I encountered the phrase “like a divine eggplant of destiny.” It simultaneously tickled and enchanted me.
Fine. But just remember you have to pay the cable bill today or the labyrinth is gonna be a whole lot less entertaining.
H(airy) P(urring) Lovecraft, I presume?
no doubt about it: NTMTOM is a Lovecraft fan. Wonder if he has a plushie Cthulhu at work.
Or a Cthulhu Pikachu:
http://cache.gawkerassets.com/assets/images/9/2011/05/pika.jpg
From the depths of hidden B’sktlyah
There are cats man (and woman) was not meant to know!
couldn’t help but read the last part of the chant as Jerry Lewis
“nabisco BLAYvin!”
Dammit! This made me fall over laughing – but now I can’t get it out of my head! I have to make a serious phone call for work, but every time I reach for the phone I hear “nabisco BLAYvin!” and start giggling helplessly.
You weren’t the only one who went there!
Me too!
The Divine Eggplant of Protection. NTMTOM, you’re insane, thank god.
I totally agree!
I propose NTMTOM as the official Cute Overload dungeon master!
*blink* You mean he wasn’t already?
WHAT dungeon?
D’you mean that there is a different world, outside of CO ????
In order to gain acess to the laundry and cross the threshold over the River Tide-y Cat, you must answer these 3 questions:
1. What is your name?
2. What is your quest?
3. What is your favorite color?
Blue! no, Red! AHHHHH!
African or European?
I call matchingks of the golden glowing eyes with the basket!
“It puts the Eggplant in the basket.”
+1
Dr, Lecter I presume?
Haha…brilliant!
I love the new tag! I also love those amazing eyes. Typical of Mike though, leaving us wanting to read the next page of the story…
Only NTMTOM understands the deep, eldritch connection between HP Lovecraft and Jerry Lewis.
I believe he is their love child. I mean c’mon : A hint of Vanilla?” That’s genetic right there.
I would have expected a hint of catnip. That’s NTMTOM, always keeping us guessing!
Whoda thunk Basement Cat needs baskethab?
oooh, another GBCWBGE…
They are THE BEST!!!!!!
translation please? forgive my ignorance
Glossy Black Cat with Beautiful Green Eyes. (I think)
I would have thought Golden Eyes, myself.
They are gold. They don’t always glow like that, but when they do, boy, do they glow. (I’m Guinnie’s Mommy.)
Lucky you, Miss Tara!
I think it would work for Golden or Green. I have ones that go between golden and green, depending on the light.
run away! run away!
Oh the horror!!! *HUG*
First comes “baskethab”, then comes “boxhab”.
What about “sheddinghab”or “lickinghab” or “annoyinghab”??????
tried to make me go to annoyinghab, I said “nanner nanner nanner!”
*snarfle*
Tried to make me go to antisocialhab, I said !@#!@#@#$$%^$!
Love it!
Hairballhab?
Eddy’s going to fatdumbhab as soon I’ve saved enough for the fees.
I sent Vega there. Save your $.
What about SurpriseAttackHab?
I thought it was called LurkensproingHab ….
Naah. If you see Lurkensproing, you can be pretty sure there’s an attack in the offing. With Dante, though, you really never know.
If fatdumbhab doesn’t work, I’ll save up some more and try sending Eddy to pervhab.
c.o. needs to go to habhab
“habhab” FTW.
habhab wins at the internets.
Am sending my orange tabby to barfhab.
Oh yeah, Eddy needs to go to that one, too. Oh, hell, I can’t afford all these habs, forget it.
Does anybody want an Eddy? (Now that I’ve made him sound so appealing.)
I feel for you – I have ten cats – do you know what the odds are that I’ll wake up on any given day and have to clean up barf??
Before I get up in the morning, I lie in bed listening to the barfing. Once I’m up, it’s the daily game of “Locate The Barf Sites”. I confess that if I’m really in a hurry, I don’t always clean up all of it before leaving. And sometimes when I come home, a pile that was there in the morning is…GONE.
That sounds so Proustian . . . “Before I get up in the morning, I lie in bed listening to the barfing.”
Dear Theresa, my life is nothing if not Proustian.
Cake or death?
cake please!
NTMTOM – you rule!
Death. No! No! I meant Cake!
We’ve only got one piece of cake left.
Oh and don’t forget about paperbaghab!
I tewtally agree NTM is the best!
There are two nice big eggplants in my garden. This weekend I will figure out which one to stuff and bake and which to use for protection. I hope to the great god Skippy I get it right.
“Eeny-oony-wanah! Eeny-oony-wanah!”
(elebenty-hundred internets to whomever can spot the reference
)
Far Side?
Elebenty-hundred Internets to Birdcage!
Personally I think you should sacrifice one to the great god of Baba Ghanoush.
What about the great god of Baigan Bhartha? Or are we getting too deep into Global Culinary Theology?
Mmmmm Moussaka…. Best use of eggplant… ever.
I made several hlgrrlph sounds myself while reading NTMTOM;s script.
i thought that was the baby Tasmanian devil!
For some reason, I read that as “baby Tasmanian weevil.”
Thought Teresa had discovered a new species.
The weevils, naturally, go “hwgrrwph, hwgrrwph.”
Sorry honey I couldn’t do the the laundry today. I used up the last charge on my Divine Eggplant doing the delicates last week and I’m not going near that basket unless I’m fully charged.
How about “Attack moms feet with full claw action in the middle of the night while she’s asleep-hab” ?
(Good thing I walk around & work bare foot cause my feet are too torn up to wear shoes)
Instead of hairballs, eldrich kitty yaks up shoggoths.
Or maybe mimmoths….
What a remarkable photograph.Not only is it instantly gut-wrenchingly funny,but I am blown away by its art value as a photograph in all seriousness.
Thank you!
Dear NTMTOM,
You make the world better. Never stop.
Totally brill, as always NTMTOM.
Nikki, has he let you lick his brain yet?
skippymom, you’re gonna get me in trouble here, loling at work!
Sowwies.
***snicker***
Needs moar tentaclez.
Aww, who’s a cute little elder god? Who’s a cute little nameless horror?
Go ahead, I dare you, tickle his tummy.
*grumble grumble* just roll the dice! *grrummphlph ** *now where’d i put that henway spell?* *dig dig dig*
*obediently* But Sharpy– what’s a henway?
Don’t taunt the elder god.
It’s tacky.
Nor should you taunt Happy Fun Ball.
Buffy reference, great!!!
How appropriate for Black Cat Appreciation Day!
EVERY day is Black Cat Appreciation Day!
eeeek – it’s Basement Cat’s 2nd cousin !!!
Oh Mike, but not the other Mike, you always make me laugh!!
Guinnie? Short for Guinness?
I never knew before today that there was a Black Cat Appreciation Day! I am so happy to learn this. I lurve black kitties.
It’s actually short for LeGuin. Her full name is Ursula LeGuin Wyckoff, which she hears when she jumps on the counter while I’m cooking.
Quick, what’s your favorite book of hers? The author, I mean. Unless, of course, your cat has been penning novels in that basket.
The Tombs Of Atuan!
The Left Paw of Darkness.
Not all Black cats are Basement Cat cousins. Our Fifi is one of the sweetest cats evar!
….Love the Lovecraft reference! Brilliant as always, NTMTOM.
I see Fifi has you just where she wants you.
yup – in the basement
I love it. I have a picture of my cat doing the same thing. I cropped it & use it as my avatar pic everywhere.
http://s176.photobucket.com/albums/w191/auroragyps/?action=view¤t=peekabooZeal.jpg
AWW
Tara N., your black kitty, Guinnie, looks like he/she needs a good cuddling after once you are able to coax said kitty out of that basket 
She ALWAYS needs a good cuddling. And she gets it, too.
CO is always my last stop of the evening, ’cause I think it’s good to end the day with a laugh/chuckle/guffaw/snicker/snort/LOL/ROTFL/etc…. as always, I bow before NOMTOM’s genius, and love all the comments!
There’s a Jawa in your laundry basket.
Excellent!