I’m So Eeeeeeee-veeeeeel

Go ahead. Taunt me with your infantile cooing and babbling. Pat my head at your convenience and declare “what a cute cat.” But I am not a cat, oh no. I am Evil; pure Evil in feline form. My eyes are evil. My ears are evil. Even my nose is eee-veel. And when at last I tire of your insipid prattle, you shall be made to suffer, and I will drink your pain like sweet nectar. I haven’t worked out the method yet, but when I do…


Nice knowing you, Katharine S.

86 comments … read them below or add one

  1. ashagato says:

    flat head!

  2. Gigi says:

    Your suffering will be legendary even in Hell.

  3. The Doctor (NOT Ayaa) says:

    I have faced Daleks, Cybermen, The Weeping Angels, the Master, the Devil himself….but nothing…nothing in all the universes could have prepared me to face such a horrible evil….As Emperor Pussy the Magnificent!

    And yet…I just want to nibble on his ears and stick my nose in his neck…how odd.

  4. Nikki says:

    Oooo, so scary! Evil kitty’s face says “We are not amused.”.

  5. Robin says:

    My owl impresshun – let me show you it.

  6. Esau Sarante says:

    Jejeje that’s such an “evil” cute little cat…check out “Gordo humping the teddy bear” on youtube for an evil weird dog.

  7. ElishaB. says:

    Whoa…..”I will drink your pain like sweet nectar”….man this cat needs to get out more! (Great line NTMTOM) ;)

  8. Andi from NC says:

    “….drink your pain like sweet nectar…” that absolutely made me howl out loud – Thanks for the laugh NTMTOM

  9. tracylee says:

    he could serve tea on that head…
    that’s not really very evil, though, is it?

  10. Theresa says:

    Shouldn’t there be a Rule Of Cuteness about PO’d looking kitties? I find them utterly irresistible.

  11. Theresa says:

    PS: “No, Mr Bond, I expect you to SPLODE.”

  12. BeckyMonster says:

    Send in The Russian!!!!

  13. Saffron says:

    White shoes before Memorial Day???
    How déclassé.

    • Fird Birfle says:

      Yes, well, y’know, us ‘Mericuns kinda did the whole “Revolting” Thing, a coupla hunnerd yeers ago, and we ain’t grow’d up, into our long britches, yet …..

  14. Xia says:

    That is one seriously annoyed kitty!

  15. Auntie Meme says:

    “Don’t flatten your ears at ME, young man!”
    /Mom

    (feline equivalent of rolling eyes and sighing right before calling you something under its breath)

  16. Guinea Peeg Lover says:

    Woah…. when my dad said cats were evil (just because he’s allergic to them, by the way), he was right. (But I seriously doubt he saw anything like this.)

  17. Wendy says:

    Sorry, but this poor kitteh has nothing on my BIL’s cat Pooky. THAT cat is El Diablo Gato. PURE Evil.

  18. Juno says:

    Eeevil. Like the fru-it of the devil.

    (My parents’ cat is so evil that that’s what the rest of us call her, as if it is her name: Evil. They call her ‘Cute-Face.’)

  19. Theresa says:

    BTW, if anyone is in doubt about the correct pronunciation of “EVIL” refer to the nearest Vincent Price movie.

  20. ceejoe says:

    At the risk of getting my arm clawed off, >BEEP< on the cute widdle black nose!

  21. Louisa says:

    whatever you say, sweetheart, now come let me brush you.

  22. Sherri says:

    That cat should be submitted to Cats That Look Like Ron Swanson.

    • Sharpy says:

      may i just personally say thank you for that?

      thank you for that.

      –the future mrs. ron swanson

      • Fird Birfle says:

        @ Sharpy:
        [if Sherri doesn't mind my speaking in proxy for her?]
        “Why, yes, yes Sharpy, you may :)

        Also: just wond’rin’ Aloud
        [Note another semi-current CO post stream regarding the album Aqualung and Jethro Tull] … has the distinguished Ron Swanson, received any notifications about the Delightful Event in his immej’yat future, hmmmmm??????

  23. Gail White says:

    I call this pose my cat’s owl impersonation. But this cat’s owl is even better — more disapproving. He looks like a Republican considering Obama’s budget plan.

    • Roketto says:

      Normally I stay away from politics because I’m a minority on the internet (moderate Republican leaning towards Libertarian), but that metaphor is HILARIOUS, not to mention very true.

      Oddly enough, my Weimaraner can do that same facial expression, & looks just as disapproving. Inter-species Disapproval! It started with bunnies. Now cats can wither you with a glance. Even the lovable dogs are not immune to the potency of “The Look”!

      That’s it, we’re all doomed. x_xo

  24. Fird Birfle says:

    “I’m Reviewing….the Situation..
    Should a fellow be a [....] all his life?

    I think I”d better think it out, aGAIN”…

    (Please note: the 1968 film is one of my selections for top five alltime musical films. I place that version, with THOSE actors/ actresses, on a par with Fiddler on the Roof, for sheer power and force of psychological quandaries. I attepted to locate a webpage with lyrics and another with the performance of the character actor who played Fagin in that film; but the only webpages which went into the kind of discussion on the song, all apparently were assoc. with malware) :(

    • Gigi says:

      I agree, as a little girl I had a BIG crush on the Artful Dodger (Jack Wild)

      • Martha in Washington says:

        And Mark Lester (Oliver) was pretty cute too!

        • Theresa says:

          He always looked to me like he had a cold.

          • Fird Birfle says:

            James Lipton’s career is in danger these days (Inside the Actor’s Studio, Bravo) as
            another of La Therese’s incisive commentaries on film history has been recently published. Deep and thought-provoking, as so often is the case, this time it’s the 1968 film Oliver! for the subject.

            (winky winky; I’m only being a bad guurrl, HERE,

            b’cause I know that there were other moments when I ‘ve commemorated, some teensy yet profound little aspect of character for whom you had located the cause, etc or something from Gilbert/ Sullivan. Please be generous with your powers of forgiveness.
            I is only playing – I pwamise)

          • Theresa says:

            Will Ferrell’s James Lipton imitation is almost indistinguishable from the real thing, providing a further application of Poe’s Law (impossible to distinguish parody of particular Silly Thing from the Silly Thing Itself)

  25. dogsleder says:

    She’s doing a great Disapproving Rabbit impresshun as well.

  26. bashful says:

    The density of evil per square milimeter in that teeny nose must be astroNOMical….

  27. ashagato says:

    look, she has no mouf!!!! no wonder she’s pissed off….

  28. Desdemona says:

    My cat looks like this when she’s been napping on my lap and I have the inexcusable NERVE to want to go to the bathroom.

    • victoreia says:

      Why, the nerve of you! Disturbing her Highness’ nap!

      (Oh, wait, I do that, too……)

  29. (The Original) Mel says:

    “Ye shall perish.” Hide your shoes!

  30. carolina says:

    Not at all evil.
    Just has a low toleration for morons.

  31. Deb says:

    The coldness of this cat’s evil soul has even caused his nose tighten and shrink.
    And yet he is a good plumpy plushy boy, idn’t he????

  32. Martha in Washington says:

    Looks just like my first cat Sally. Oddly enough, he never really liked me.

  33. Aemely says:

    What happened to its mouth? Is that a Photoshop?

  34. Lorel J says:

    Okay, I know this is crazy, but I can’t help it and I have to risk it:….. BEEP!

    • Fird Birfle says:

      The Crowd’s suspense heightens.

      “Oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooh, the DANGER !!!111!!!!” :)

      • Lorel J says:

        I beeped then sped away without (I thought) ramifications. But I had scary dreams last night.

  35. ralfast says:

    The End s NigharaghKAAAFKAAAFPOTOEY-hairball-Nigh!
    :D

  36. catmom says:

    look into my eyes you are getting sleepy, sleepy now get me some tuna!

  37. Noelegy says:

    Happycat’s lesser-known brother, Snarkycat.

  38. Moni says:

    looks like a purrfect candidate for http://www.mycathatesyou.com/

  39. Rose says:

    No, you cain’t haz cheezeburger!

  40. hrhqueencat says:

    and – Basement Cat is mah homey :)

  41. Leticia says:

    its my birthday and I will squeeze you if I want to

  42. Jessy says:

    That is a precious, sweet, kitty. Evil. Hmf!

  43. jen says:

    never before have i seen such an evil nose.

    tee hee. i’m a-shakin’ in me booties!!!!

  44. Harper says:

    I do beliebe that my Alti has found herself a ebil twin! She has a very similar look!

    http://tinyurl.com/reallydont