Groom for Improvement

… and do you, Ken, take Genevieve to be your wife, in sickness and in health, for richer or more richer, to honor and obey, to squeegee the shower door without having to be reminded, to sit through weepy costume dramas even during the playoffs, to wait quietly at the shoe store without squirming, to act unimpressed when a Victoria’s Secret commercial comes on, for as long as you both shall live?

Then, by the authority vested in me, I pronounce you…

… ah, as a general rule, we would prefer you wait until after the ceremony…

I give it six months, Kristen L.



  1. Cute…or scary? Those are some evil eyes.

  2. I really do hope it works out! So much love 🙂

  3. 260Oakley says:

    I believe the happy couple met at a Barbie-queue.

  4. bookmonstercats says:

    Ken has a smile on his face fer shure. However, since she will prob’ly eat him afterwards…. (Do they do that where Genevieve hails from?)

  5. LOL! At that scale it looks like a capybara!

  6. Well, I have my fingers crossed for these two but I hear that slut Barbie maybe trying to win him back.

    Now that the ring is on his finger, he better not look twice when she strolls by in her pink convertible.

  7. skippymom says:

    Hey everybody, if I could borrow the thread for just a minute?
    My sweet princess Chloe injured her eye, and I dropped her off this morning with an eye specialist. I’m waiting right now to hear from him whether he can save it. I know she will be fine either way, but obviously I hope she can keep her eye. Can I ask for some thoughts and prayers?

  8. StormCat42 says:

    Ahhh poor Chloe!!! Hopefully it’s something that can be fixed quickly and painlessly!! Let us know what you find out!! *hugs to you and Chloe*

  9. Thank heavens there’s a veterinary eye specialist available to consult for Chloe! I don’t imagine there’s a lot of those around the country. All my best thoughts.

  10. Thanks! Yeah, I had no idea there was such a thing as a veterinary eye specialist until a couple of days ago.

  11. Sending lots of good thoughts and prayers for Ms. Chloe. My Lily has her own opthamologist so I know what great things can be done. Please keep us posted.

  12. Haaahaha…
    To act unimpressed when a Victoria’s Secret commercial comes on…..

  13. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!! says:

    and — BOOM — 2600 lays anudder one down!!!!!

  14. Lots of good warm thoughts going to Chloe from me and my bunch!

  15. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!! says:

    O Princess Chloe — be well!!

    — or all us CO peeps will have to worry and hover over skippy’smom —
    *prays urgently*

  16. A new rule of cuteness: pocket pets and action figures in meaningful relationships?

    I think Ken likes his woman with a leetle meat on her bones. Just sayin’.

  17. We’re keeping all paws crossed for Chloe.

  18. ohnoo…all my best thoughts to Chloe

  19. Oh Noes!!! poor little Miss Cloe.. Sending all kinds of good thoughts and prayers for her.

    and keeping all bendy bits crossed for a full recovery, and sending hugs to you too since I am sure you are stressing out.

  20. Rohameo and Julihamlet… and they shall live Hamily ever after.

  21. freetomato says:

    Prayers coming at you and Chloe. I feel your pain – just today got an “on her way to 100% bill of health” on my pup that was hit by a car on 1/13 (collapsed lung, fractured pelvis, tail smashed so badly it had to be amputated). I know just how much your furry loved one means to you and how important the good juju I got from my friends was to both of us.

    That being said, isn’t it kind of eerie how perfectly the peeg’s eyes match the groom’s tie?????

  22. “But Ken, she’s a pig!”

    “I don’t care. I always wanted to be with a woman who squeals at the site of me.”

  23. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!! says:

    OMG 400 well-wishes, in your direction, as well!!!!

  24. Mary (the first) says:

    Love the hammy porn! Genevieve and Ken should be very happy!
    And hugs to Skippymom and Chloe for fast recovery and good news!

  25. Big time, Skippymom.

  26. I would be tempted to take out the damages on that car. Or at least send the bill to the driver.

  27. She’s just gone into surgery. They’re going to save the eye–the doctor said it will always look funny but she will have vision.
    Thank you so much for all your concern and good wishes.

  28. I always heard he was gay so colored me surprised!

  29. Hugs to your pup! So glad he/she is better.

    And also on the fashion front, how about the fact that Ken is formally dressed but barefoot?

  30. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!! says:

    *all fingaires and toesies are crossed*
    Keep us posted!!!!!

  31. Her vanity maybe hurt but at least she’ll have her vision in that eye! Good news!

  32. She is a beautiful little girl, but she’s also a “tough broad”. Her older brothers are completely in awe of her, and I’m thinking that having a weird eye will probably give her even more power over them.

  33. hollys_mum says:

    Get a room!

  34. OMG OMG! This makes me think of hypnotoad!!! Must…go…watch…

  35. I’m keeping my fingers AND toes crossed for the two of you !
    Everything WILL be o.k……….. Everything WILL be o.k. ……….Everything WILL be o.k. !

  36. Martha in Washington says:

    Ummm…I think Ken is more of an “inaction” figure. I think that may be why Barbie dumped him.

  37. Martha in Washington says:

    Not that there is anything wrong with that.

  38. skippymom says:

    I see now that she is a she. Sorry I didn’t read more carefully earlier.

  39. @ FreeTomato, I’m soooooo sorry to hear about your pup ! Hope the healing happens really really fast for both of your sakes. I sure wish I was in your area , I would come over & baby sit for you so you could get a real good nap. I know how much sleep I lost when my cat broke a leg. Every time she moved it would wake me up & I would have to check & make sure she wasn’t trying to chew the cast off.
    I was walking around like the living dead. Try to get some rest !

  40. skippymom says:

    They just called to say everything went just fine, and I’m going to get my baby now!

  41. So great that they can save Chloe’s eye. That’s fantastic. Hugs to you, Skippymom. Smooch.

  42. Haha. NTMTOM. I heart you.

  43. victoreia says:

    Good luck, Chloe! And hugs to you, Skippymom!

  44. victoreia says:


  45. Hey…they have the same hair color….

  46. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!! says:

    did she kick him to tha curb?

    Are pale-complexioned females allowed to make that claim?

  47. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!! says:

    YAY, skippymom!!! YAY, opthalmologist!!! YAY, Chloe!!!
    “Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!& etc”

  48. Finally he made an honest peeg out of her.

    Congratulations, Miss Peegy!

  49. *snerk, I say*

  50. bahahahahaha at 2600oakley.

    a barbie que.

    will be laughing at that for a while

  51. That’s fantastic Skippymom! Huge sighs of relief…

  52. Yay for Chloe! My fur kids and I are sending warm thoughts your way for a speedy recovery. 🙂

  53. (The Original) Mel says:


  54. (The Original) Mel says:

    ❤ and prayers to Chloe.

  55. (The Original) Mel says:

    French Ken says: She ees a feelthy peeg and I lof eet!

  56. Gigi (the original one) says:

    I’ve been on my back most of the day and not on the computer (hurt my back shoveling wet heavy snow this morning), so I’ve learned of Chloe’s injury and of the good news that the eye can be saved all at the same time.
    I’m very happy for you, keep us informed of her progress.

  57. Hoooray! Such good news!

  58. @ (The Original) Mel: ADORABLE! Oh I how I wish there was a French Ken! They will munch Croque-Madames (or Monsieurs) in the bed together, rollicking feelthily in ze crumbs.

  59. If anything, he’ll be looking at the convertible…

  60. Right now, I can’t even GRASP how much ass this photoshoot kicks!! *jealous*

  61. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!! says:


  62. victoreia says:

    Also to freetomato and her baby, as well!

  63. victoreia says:

    I think it’s only if they’re commando-trained…..(I’m sure there’s a union rule or something.)

  64. I just find it hilarious that someone took the time to set this up LOL the white back drop, the veil, dressing Ken up in his tux!! Who woke up one morning and thought to themselves, “hey, I have a GREAT IDEA!!!!!!” too funny

  65. Did anyone see the episode of South Park where the guinea peegs take over? “OMG I’m so startled!!!!!!!”

  66. LOL You guys crack me up.

  67. The circle must be broken.

  68. Hey I know that clip, it’s so fu– ALL HAIL HYPNOTOAD!

  69. “to act unimpressed when a Victoria’s Secret commercial comes on” NTMTOM, you know a woman’s heart, yes you do. I’ve told you this countless times before, but it bears repeating — you rule!

  70. ./~ Black Hole Sun, won’t you come and wash away the rain ./~

  71. Seriously. This is exactly what I think too, when I see things like this. 🙂

  72. YaY for Chloe and Skippymom! Joey, Cletus, Matisse, Molly, Sparky, Elaine, Patches, Daisy, Alex, Libby, and Samantha are all happy too, for their friend Chloe!!

  73. I can’t believe this is on Cu– ALL HAIL THE HYPNOTOAD!

  74. And boom goes the dynamite.

  75. Excellent! Oh Skippymom, there is no relief like that relief.

  76. Studio Hen says:

    It’s a rule in our house that the channel must be changed if a Victoria Secret commercial comes on. House Rule #12.
    Averting eyes is not acceptable. Unimpressed facial features (or other body features) are not enough.

  77. Argyle Donkeypants says:

    It’s like I’ve been saying for years: Marriage should be between one man and one peeg.

  78. Oh thank goodness, thinking good thoughts for both of you.

  79. A rooting tooting, Whoot Whoot fer Chloe, she won’t be needing the eye patch and parrot accessories.

  80. The FAO Schwartz near me had TONS of Ken postcards, mostly of him hanging out with other Ken dolls. Obviously they knew their demographic.

    Well, except for the lack of Ken/GI Joe dolls. There’s a high bear quotient in my town if you drive past the starbucks.

  81. Mon dieu mon petit cochon your squeaks drive me wild with passhon, you wild abandoned grissette. Let me shower you wis kisses, erm if you could remove the sweetcorn from your cheek pouches first.

  82. Studio Hen – What other body features would that be. Snerkity snerk 🙂

  83. Genevieve has obviously been jilted at the altar more than once and is taking no chances. However ravishing the groom in front of the vicar and assembled guests is a trifle OTT.

  84. Good point – I think we need a Matchingks tag!

  85. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!!! says:

    HonGlad — Are you two-timin’ my friend QoD??
    I thought that you two had already reserved the Chapel ‘o Luuuuuuuuuuuuuv for your ceremony?

  86. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!!! says:

    @ StudioHen:
    I LIKE THIS rule. 🙂

  87. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!!! says:

    aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand ARGYLE is gracing us today too!!!

    How ya BEEN???????

    Also: I appreciate your beliefs re. marriage 🙂

  88. By the way, Not Mike (or whatever your name is), I’m totally writing these vows down and if I ever get married, we’re using them in the ceremony! :mrgreen:

  89. Actually, in some traditional marriage ceremonies (from a LONG way back in time), the bride and groom HAD to consummate their relationship in full view of everyone. Awkward…

  90. It’s like the CO Classic Lineup! Now where are Teho and Berthaservant?

  91. eternalcanadian says:

    Whoa, that was one disturbing post, lolz. O_O

  92. HEheheehe!

  93. O NO – Be assured Q of D is the only gal for me. However I’m not too sure about the
    Chapel of lurve, I was thinking of something more intimate. If the Archbishop of Canterbury could hang on for a minute, after Wills and whatsit tie the knot at Westminster Abbey, we could save on the flowers and the BBC would be on hand for the video. Get your best hat ready for April 🙂

  94. Oh my, has Berthaservant been around at all? I miss his posts.

  95. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!!! says:

    yeh, I’ve also been wondering about our Dr. Berthaservant lately.
    Hopefully all is so good for her (?) that she doesn’t have time for playful occupations such as browsing CO any longer!

  96. Wills and whatsit, LOL!

    I read an article about Kate Middleton the other day, and I was actually pretty impressed. She sounds like a sensible, level-headed young woman. I have no time for (any) monarchy, but I do wish them the best!

  97. Theresa – Have there been any sightings of Theo whilst I was absent or has he reached mythical status?

  98. Him.

  99. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!!! says:

    All right, that sounds VERY appropriate.
    Thank you for the invite; I’ll save the date, and I”m glad to know that your intent and integrity are unbesmirched. As to headgear, I’m currently considering the following two choices and haven’t yet made up my mind. Do click and see what you think 🙂

  100. HG – Teho has posted comments a few times recently, so he must have some free time from the military types…

  101. bookmonstercats says:

    Hon Glad – you’re back. There’s been an APB out on you. We’ve been guessing you’ve been cavorting in warm climes.

  102. bookmonstercats says:

    I like the first one – I can just see you in it, O NO. The fact that I don’t know what you look like is immaterial, since it’s all done through the magic of C.O.

    The right hand side one in the second picture is good as well – I like a wider brim meself.

  103. I like the first one as well, though the addition of wax fruit and a stuffed Starling (which I can provide) would set it off a treat 🙂

  104. Surprised is a perfectly acceptable colour.

  105. Back of the queue, young lady.

  106. 4leafclover says:

    Oh, I’m so glad to hear it!! I am so happy that everything worked out!!

  107. Oh, I didn’t say I was marrying Not Mike. (Not that I don’t want to, I just don’t think I’ll live long enough to outlast the rest of his suitors. 😛 ) I’m only stealing his wedding vows! 🙂

  108. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!! says:

    although those DO sound as though they’d be FUN!!!

  109. That was creepy. Boo, not cute at all.

  110. 6 months? That’s almost as long as my marriage lasted. 😉 See-ya, Ken!

  111. This combines two loves of mine – CO and Futur – ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNOTOAD

  112. fleurdamour says:

    The groom is barefoot, and has Duran Duran hair.

  113. fleurdamour says:

    Yeah, like back in the day, the queen had to give birth to the heir in front of the whole court. AWKWARD.

  114. JustanotherHeather says:

    Of course the groom has bare feet! It’s a beach wedding.

  115. Argyle Donkeypants says:

    I’ve been well! Busy, dontchaknow. Fortunately I have my CO Wall Calendar of Mega-Extreme Excellence to keep me muzzlepowche-high in cute each day, so even when I can’t stop by, I’m squeeing along in spirit.

  116. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!! says:

    — Well then I’ll pack up the hat with some tissue paper and book the flight 🙂

  117. psychethos says:

    What’s wrong with Victoria’s Secret commercials? I like seeing what they have for sale. I don’t mind if my boyfriend ogles the ladies either, doesn’t hurt my eyes to look at them either.

  118. Queen of Dork says:

    Yay Hon Glad! I’m so happy that my cyber sweetheart has returned…how divine! And I like that first hat as well. *blows kisses* 🙂

  119. fleurdamour says:

    He does look a bit like Kurt Cobain. That would make the guinea pig…

  120. O NO He/ She/ It DI-unt!!! says:

    Je suis d’accord.

  121. Imagine having to do that with your father-in-law, who happens to be the POPE, behind the headboard. Now why the POPE has a daughter is another story about the olden days.

  122. i hope she gets better. even tho idk you ill still tell you.

    Princess Merliah