Why I Love My Big Brother Lenny
By Nathan Ghlarblefarb, Second Grade
I love my big brother Lenny becauze he is nice and kind and doesnt treat me like Im littel. Leik yesterday we crossed teh street and Lenny said I culd go first and didnt even haf to wait for the lite if I didnt want too. Taht is why I love my brother Lenny.
Special thanks to JoAnn P.
Oh good lord! The little one (Nathan) is sooooo innocent and sweet! And Lenny’s expression is priceless, lol!
Ah, big brother memories. He used to put me in a head lock, or “rope burn” my arm, or do the “why are you hitting yourself? ” thing. Once we were playing “cops and robbers,” and he tied my hands behind my back, tied my feet together, and then just left. After yelling for my mom for about ten minutes, I started hopping down the hall looking for help. I fell flat on my face and split my lip. I’ll never forget seeing the ground rushing toward my face, and not being able to use my hands to stop it. Now that we’re all grown up, he’s a great guy, but those were some learning experiences, for sure. :/
I have two older brothers. They used to enjoy tying my hands behind my back and my feet together, sticking me in a closet, and soaping the inside door knob. My oldest brother once pushed me down the cellar stairs, and I’m not sure which of us was more surprised that I was absolutely fine.
The look on Lenny’s face is pretty much how my older brothers looked at me. I’m not nearly as cute as Nathan, though.
I think that these behaviors are probably installed in all boys at the moment our mamas gave birth to the next child.
I’ll simply add here, that I had the ineffable joy of growing up with *THREE* knucklehaid older brudders.
(sigh)
My eternal pity to you. Two older brothers was two too many.
thank you. That is healing
I can beat those odds and then some, I grew up with -Four- older and one younger brother, I was the only girl in the family. I learned how to fight dirty at a very young age!
I had two YOUNGER brothers… >:)
So did I. Mainly I got the better of them – apart from the day they locked me in the front garden and threw all my cuddly toys AND my underwear (giant navy blue school gym knickers) out of the bedroom window onto the front lawn.
We’re all very close now, but if our mother knew the half of it…..
Me too, one used to beat the **** out of me if I didn’t let him watch what he wanted.
He still watches what he wants, since he hasn’t grown up an awful lot over the last 35 years, but I don’t care anymore since I don’t watch TV anyway.
One younger brother, but we were only about a year and a half apart. I was (against my will) a tackling dummy and wrestling partner. Not to mention his more subtle forms of torture like putting pee in my Love’s Baby Soft.
**ewww**
IMHO, many bro’s are not pleasant humans — at least for awhile –
I didn’t know that a Hippity Hop was classified as a lethal weapon.
Well, it should’ve been. Anything that can be swung and has a handle should be. Funny thing is that my grown brother wouldn’t buy one for his own kids.
*Want.*
This cracked me up!
omg, they’re precious!
woah, check out the head-to-body ratio on lil’ Nathan there!
(and I kind of want to grab Lenny’s tongue. weird, huh?)
I kinda want to grab Lenny’s tongue, too. Why? Why? Why?
If this were my little pup, he would never cross the street alone… *pushes big brother over and sits next to Nathan rubbing his weedle tum-tum*
Another brilliant wait-for-it scrolldown, NTMTOM.
The peenkness on the pup keels me! Not to even mention the eye chub!
Every time I check for new comments and I scroll down past “eye chub,” I have to stop and scroll up again and look at it!
I loooof this post.
GHLARBLEFARB!
Hear, hear!!!
or here, here!!!!
(your preference)
What she said.
I’m still trying to decide if NTMTOM is extremely gifted or nearly criminally insane or both!
As the youngest of seven, I remember my brother lamenting his “not-an-only-child” status all the time! The poor dear!!
He’s littel!!
One of my favorite secondary funnies here at C.O. is often the names of the characters. They’re always Lenny and Norman and Stan and stuff. I don’t know why I think that’s just hilarious.
The names NOMTOM uses are a riot; my personal favorites are that gunslinging hedgie “The Prickly Kid” and those beloved prairie dog thespians “Redonkuletta DeMille” and “Rock Proshman”.
Also between the post and the comments I’m reminded why I’m grateful to be an only child.
.
The comments kinda remind me why I told my parents I didn’t want a little brother when I was three. Don’t know if my little sister is as much of an improvement as I thought she’d be……
Don’t be forgettin’ Dr. Lipschwitz and Schblatz Beer!
I think we need more Nigels and Kevins.
Seconded!
Apparently the two most frequently used male names on “Monty Python’s Flying Circus” were Ken and Arthur.
I am a firm believer in the therapeutic
powers of Dr. Lipschwitz!!!
somewhere out there, lennies and normans and stans shed a tear
hee! I would clarify that those perfectly dignified adult human names suddenly become hilarious when applied to ridonkulous tiny baby pups and kittens and such. And, as pointed out below, yes, carl too!
A friend of mine has a wonderful hound mix named Jeff.
The name Jeff always reminds me of the colossal alien worm-thing in the subway in “Men in Black II.” “Jeff, I am SO not in the mood for you! Get back in the subway! Right now! “
LOVE that scene!! Jeff and his little flower-head!
*feels the need to go home and watch both MIB movies back-to-back to see if they are even more hilarious when I’m all goofy on cold meds*
What about Carl? HMMMMmmmmmm?
My favorite is any animal named Kevin. I think that is hysterical.
I want to see a poodle named Roger.
Oh, that’s awesome. Steve would work too. Or Ethel.
I think Gary is a great cat name.
As in:
“Gary, why are you so disgusted?”
(long pause, camera scans to Pedro, lolling promiscuously on the floor)
“Oh.”
http://cuteoverload.com/2010/05/30/q-why-is-gary-so-disgusted/
Gary is a great SNAIL’S name, anyway…
“Ghlarblefarb”
Ah, you shant have the pudding in my mouth yet, CO.
The back pup is giving the stink eye and the raspberries – a double threat.
Hostility, Thy Name is Lennie!!!
(oops) LennY
But then Nathan outgrew Lenny, and revenge was sweet.
LOL! Love the sweet little Nathan and the evil older brother.
I’m the second of two girls, no brothers. I think it’s different with girls, the aggression is not as physical as with boys, it’s more mental (teasing, name calling, mean little tricks) but older sister get the point across just the same.
I hate to burst anyone’s bubble but as the older sister I can state for a fact it’s not a boy thing . Don’t believe me ? Ask my sister if she wants to play circus knife thrower with grandpa’s darts !
(Hey I was GOOD ! I only nailed her once in the 20 min. we were playing.)
Any older sibs remember tapping on the same spot on the forehead with one finger till your younger sib. begged for mercy ?
No, but I remember many knock-down drag-out fights where both of us were screaming……
Also, “She’s looking at me!”
I used to just stare at my little brother until he would yell to my mom to make me stop then I was all like “what? I’m not doing anything!” Ahhh! Fond memories!
Mooooooooooommmm, he’s lookin’ at me! Make him stop!!!
A friend and I (he and his wife raised & homeschooled five young’uns)…have this whole running bit about sibling angst and interpersonal terrorism.
When a young’un is wildly irrationally, out-of-control hyperwhiney, our go-to statement is: “Mo-00-oo-m!!! He/ She’s BREATHING MY A-I-I-RRRRR!!!!”
I forgot how mean I actually was to my younger brother until reading this. Aww.. I’ma poke him on facebook a couple hundred times.
Hey Bee Bee , just point your finger at him & remind him that “you’re NOT touching him ” ;o
I have a hunch Lenny can’t be trusted.
*taps nose*
a whole day, and I just realized that nobody has beeped those leetle noses!
So – BEEP! BEEP!
My brother would argue that having three older sisters is worse. My Mom used to say that girls fight dirtier, e.g. they plot, scheme and brew, so the fight lasts longer. Boys just beat each other up. Even my two boy cats do that sometimes, even though they are 13. Acouple of rounds, then they are curled up together!
Yes…. also, sisters can be very pervasive in their influence. I know a guy who used to get dragged into playing dress-up all the time.
He’s now a deadpan snarker who likes romantic anime series.
Oh God, thank you that the truck swerved. Love me some big brother Lenny. Too cute for words!
Weighing in on the big brother/little sister issue. I had one brother 8 years older, so he was *always* bigger than me, and one brother 6 years younger, who followed me around like a baby duckling until he was about 6, then he got super annoying for a few years, and then quickly got too big for me to beat up anymore so I had to just kind of suck it up and play nice. We get along fantastically now but I can still remember all too well when he used to karate-kick my bedroom door because he didn’t think that big sisters should have privacy. (The horror)
I had an older and a younger sister, but we didn’t get squabble much because we knew mom would send all of us into next week if she got too fed up with the shenanigans.
I’m reminded of this gem from Bill Cosby:
Parents aren’t interested in justice. They just want quiet!
NTM, another day, another gem. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. Which is the gullible heart of someone who was the youngest of 8 children.
Sincerest Sympathies!
I guess the best kind of sibling to have is a twin.
I mean, they can’t claim to be older unless there’s an hour or so between.
Ayaa: On the contrary, of the twins I’ve known, the older twin will never let the younger one forget it!