Breaking News Bulletin Alert Thingie!

We interrupt our regular cuteness for this breaking story: A hamster has barricaded itself inside a roll of paper towels outside the Acme Wood Shavings factory.

The hamster’s motives are unclear at this time, but police fear there may be hostages involved. A SWAT negotiator is attempting to talk to the hamster now.

And we’re getting word now that the hamster is asking for food to be sent in, which means these negotiations could drag on well into the evening…

And now the negotiator is delivering a slice of apple to the hamster…

And we’re being told that the hamster has passed out! Yes, the magic SWAT apple did the trick, and so the crisis is over! Now back to Meg and Theo in the studio!

Our thanks to freelance cute-porter Sophie R. for these dramatic images.

Comments

  1. That’s why you always make the hostages eat the food first..

  2. Another crisis rolled up and put to bed. Cute hammie!

  3. Oh man… TMNTOM, the hovertext made me snort out my coffee!

  4. SWAT team … as in, swat, swat

  5. SWAT negotiator–now I get it. That’s what Eddy was doing last night when he was sitting on the dining room table swatting his brother Franny who was sitting on a chair. He was trying to negotiate with him! And I thought he was just being a punk.

  6. catloveschanel says:

    Make mine ham on wry

  7. SWAT negotiator FTW!

  8. Thanks for brightening my day. So cute. Hope he made it out okay.

  9. OMG NOMTOM I am ROFLMAO… too funny… and back to Meg and Theo in the studio… Swat team.snerk…This is awesome I will have to rereead it ten times today… I suspect the Hamster has things well in control even after the “snow White Apple” Snicker!

  10. A magic SWAT apple….?

  11. cyberpunkrocker says:

    Yeah, that’s what the kittehs are best in: SWATting things

  12. I’m guessing Hammy McHammerson was not harmed in this re-enactment of The Negotiator.

  13. We’re missing the next couple of pictures in the series, where the cat starts to unravel the kitchen roll (hovertext: “how long to get to the centre of a tootise-pop?”), eventually dragging it all over the floor until he gets to the cardboard tube with the chewy centre.

  14. I didn’t see claws out on Miss Kittech McSwatersons, so I’m gonna say they were playing. I hope Hammy McHampsterson knew that…

    This had me giggling. TV News, take note!

  15. Really, does that hamster look frightened? Does it have a haunted-by-cats look?

    NYERHE! It looks comftabuhls!

  16. What a dramatic story! Cable news at it’s best! :-) At least this one didn’t turn out like the Balloon Boy.

    Oh and that 1st pic? From the angle it makes Hammie look like he’s peering out of one of those huge industrial sized paper rolls you might see at a printers.

  17. As ever, NTM has nailed the accurate use of the “Breaking News Bulletin Alert Thingie” for ONLY those events which truly require us to devote our undivided attenshun.

    BTW, nice use of a feline quadruped as a savvy yet considerate negotiation skilllzzzzzzz..

    (but it might be wise to establish a security watch over the little sleeping hammie…just until the nosy public — and maybe the cat — have all left the scene and gone home for the night…)

    (aka: “Danger, Will Robinson; DANGER.”

  18. Picard! (Or Janeway!)

  19. Jeez, it’s always those sleepy suburban towns that bring out the big artillery for domestic disputes. :P

  20. PS, Hammy, it’s ALUMINUM FOIL for those mind-control satellites! Paper towels CONCENTRATE the beams’ effects!!

  21. The thing is, the ham is not shown in any of the pictures with the cat. We just think its there. Clever montage.

    And on that note, NTMTOM, you are on a roll today.

  22. marguerite212 says:

    This is one of NTMTOM’s most brilliant and hilarious posts, and that is saying a lot.

  23. I think it’s all a big hoax – Just so hamster and kitty can get their own reality show. Shame on them!

  24. And Hammy is IN a roll…(nice setup, ffleur)

  25. Also notice that in some photos, the paper towels are coming from the bottom of the roll and in others from the top, suggesting that these photos weren’t all shot in sequence (lending support to the observation that the hamster and cat never actually appear in the same scene). Still, nicely sequenced and captioned, NTMTOM.

  26. Hello chaps, Cute-porter Sophie here, Onesie (the ham ham) was completely unharmed by Ruby (the kitteh)’s negotiations. The tube on the other hand suffered minor nibblings in the process!
    Since these photos were taken, however, Onesie went on an adventure into the wall cavities, and we can only hope he is having a marvelous time with his new found freedom.
    Ruby misses him dearly.

  27. your ham is named Onesie?? That’s AWESOME!

  28. I think it’s no accident that they’re always wearing onesie pajamas!

    Ruby was always a good girl to Onesie (later nicknamed Monstro as he became huge in size).
    He would snuffle into her fur, and nibble on her tail fur while she slept atop his cage, if I had the slightest inclination he was in danger, they wouldn’t be in the same room as one another at any time. Do not fret, viewers!

  29. @ Fafi You mean Onesies is on the lamb?

  30. Paper towels are so absorbent these days, they even soak up an entire hammie!

  31. Teeny Gozer says:

    ONESIE, COME HOOOOOOME! Please keep us updated, Sophie?

    My hampster, Rootbeer, ex-caped every now and again, but he always went to the same spot in the back corner of my closet – Every. Single. Time! I left a little clump of tissues and a few hidden almonds in that spot so he’d think of it as his vacation getaway, so I could always find him and get him back.

  32. Oh God please tell me this had a happy ending. Even if he wasn’t swatted, hammy hearts don’t have a high stress threshold. Although, my dearly departed Sir Hamlet Peanut never seemed to be fazed by his big sister kitty trying to poke her paw into his face.

  33. Also you could try the peanutbutter in the open cage trick that usually brings them right home..Okay it brings rats right home but still… it might be worth a try!

    BE sure to lock ruby up for the night though.

  34. Okay Also Ham on the Lam LOLOL

  35. My hammie always liked to hide in my mom’s shoes. It was funny until she tried to put her foot in

  36. Onesie??!! Little the little garment that bebehs wear?? hahaha. Cuuute. I want to roll him around in that paper towel roll ~ whee!

    On a roll, in a roll, rolling around the floor!!

    And also little hammie vacation getaway, I love that! haha.

  37. I can picture blowing in one end of the tube and the ham-ham launching out the other like a spit-ball

    [ *PHOOP!* :lol: - Ed.]

  38. TruthBringR says:

    “We interrupt our regular cuteness for this breaking story: A hamster has barricaded itself inside a roll of paper towels outside the Acme Wood Shavings factory.”

    Embarrassing. Especially considering an adult male wrote these captions.

    Just because “baby talk” is the order of the day around here when it comes to the captions, doesn’t excuse trying to sound funny and failing miserably by coming off like a 10 year old.

  39. Here’s some baby talk, TBR: pbbbbbbbbbbt.

  40. Nine out of ten kittehs prefer Spock to either Kirk or Picard, because of, you know, the ear thing.

  41. Resriechan says:

    @ TruthbringR:

    It’s a shame, that YOU feel embarrassed by the material. Nobody else here, feels that way.

    You have a wonderful night, my friend. Mmmmmmmmmmkay? Buh-bye.

  42. Mary (the first) says:

    I have no idea what “point” TBR is trying to make.. nor do I care. NTMTOM is a genius and I’ll SWAT anyone who claims differently!

  43. I can’t believe this warrants nuffs. Geez people!

  44. I think the roll’s just been kitty-nudged around. I’m not too worried, the risk level depends on the animals involved; guinea pigs can die of peeg panic attacks too, but no one told that to my Skit, who once she and he were acclimated would nap beside our 70-pound dog and steal his food. The roughest thing he ever did with her was to accidentally sit on her once. She was fine, HE was traumatized by the protesting peegsqueal and looked nervous when starting to sit for days afterward!

    @Fafi: Peanut butter and water placed near the entry point or any possible exits (like under sinks and such) make the best baits, since being in the walls tends to make hammies thirsty. Best trick I ever learned was to use a bucket or plastic washpan the hamster can’t escape from (not TOO deep so the fall doesn’t scare them, but unclimbable from inside; you can put a cloth in to pad the landing). Then prop a ruler or some similar rigid and stable ramp-like object to allow the hamster to climb up and plunk in (if a stick or ruler, secure the upper end with masking tape, or he may knock it away) and dab tiny smears of peanut butter on the ramp. Then put the water dish and more goodies and peanut butter in the bottom of the “pit trap”. I caught numerous escapees this way, including my own wall-exploring hams.

    PS: I fully support that “pbbbbbbbbbbt”. Next, maybe he could go download a free trial and log into a MMORPG, just to tell people playing it that they’re losers! (Yes, people really do that. It’s just as unimpressive as that nuffpost.)

  45. kibblenibble says:

    NOMTOM, I wish I had the creativity that you have in your left pinky. THAT, and I’d be a bit of a genious. Keep it up.

  46. omg this kills me ded. the cuteness is overpowering!!! the hovertext is what makes it incredible, though. =)

  47. kibblenibble says:

    Love the leetle honk-shu face in the last pic. Sweet.

  48. @T.U.M. re #40–I’ll agree with you on the ear thing; plus, cats also probably respect Spock’s inscrutableness……

  49. awwwwwww cute… could it get out???

  50. He got out fine, after his little nap! Ruby got bored and got in his cage.

    I doubt he will be coming back from within the walls, as it was the beginning of December when he went a-wandering. I waited up 7 hours on the night listening for scuffles and trying to tempt him back with various treats but I guess he was just a little excited, he was always adventurous :)
    He was nearing two years old, and having a black and white kitty for a best friend, climbing curtains 6ft up, and chewing through cables behind the fridge didn’t stop him, his own curiosity did!
    He had a very very good life. :)

  51. I’m Onesies Grandma… Ruby is very good at Negotiating but alas, we couldn’t get Onesie to stay in his cage…….:(

  52. Aw. Well, I’m glad he was happy while he was around. Wish I knew why hamsters are so obsessed with invading the wall-space; how interesting could it be in there? And yet every escaped ham I ever had (it happened often thanks to one escape artist who liked to free her imprisoned brethren in the middle of the night) seemed to want to make a beeline for wall-access until we managed to plug every tiny gap. Sheesh.

  53. Space Cowgirl says:

    Hrrr SWAT.

  54. KittyMarthaPoo says:

    The last picture is the best. After all the “Hey! Look at me!”, it’s time for a nap.

    I LUFF the eye slits of sleeping animals

  55. I have to say that is a beautiful kitty. I hope he plays well with others.

  56. Awwww. Cute photos, cute storey line :o) Thumbs up :o)

  57. @TruthBringR

    The jerk store called and they’re running out of YOU!

    [Honestly, though, I wish they'd stop calling... :roll: - Ed.]

  58. Julia (the one in BC) says:

    All this “Honkshu” business has ruined my ability to pronounce the name of Japan’s main island without giggling.

  59. The kitty reminds me of one I had named Penny. sniff sniff miss her! Black and white kitties are my fav.

  60. I wish that particular jerk store would stop as well, but I can’t resist the Seinfeld quotes!

  61. I hold the answer to all your Hammie probs. My house was built in 1892 and it doesn’t have cavity walls, um, it of course has foundations……..I hope.

  62. I LOVE the approach to this site. I am laughing my butt off right now because of the great wordplay and the complete surrender to all things cute!

    [Oh no! 8O Everybody -- CATCH THAT BUTT!! - Ed.]

  63. aww!? my fav animal is a hamster and also a horse these pics are cute?! i used to have a dwarf hamster but some kids came over one day when i wasn’t there and were throwing him around and he… well u know :(

  64. those pic, are so cute

  65. Madelyn says:

    lol :)

  66. Madelyn says:

    ;)

  67. Madelyn!!!W. says:

    i want one! ;)

  68. Hope your little hammie returns. The first time mine ran away I was on my hands and knees and belly for hours, but now I know he always goes to the guest room for a nap :)

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