I Am The Magical Lumpfish!

… and you caught me fair and square, so I shall grant you three wishes! But (gasp!) if I could offer a suggestion (wheeze!), and far be it from me (choke!) to influence what I’m sure (urk!) must be a challenging decision (harrgh!), but you might want your first wish (aaack!) to be for a fish tank, (hurrp!) maybe a bucket of water…

Photo by Tobi M., who assures us that the little feller swam safely away afterward.



  1. He’s ummm, cute… in a warty sort of way. 🙂

  2. What a very bleeny shade of brown! I love the little lips with the barest hint of a smile…

  3. He looks so grouchy!

  4. Trabb's Boy says:

    Sparkly little blorp, inn’t he?

  5. Looks like a wacked out sugar plum!

  6. he’s adorabuhls

    *brings him water*

  7. This one belongs on cute overload, he looks like hes saying “Hiya!”

  8. What a CUTE little fishy! He does look like he’s gasping for breff, though–I’m glad they let him swim away.

  9. Dreamspinner Cheryl says:

    The latest fall fashion for fishies-Polka Dots! In flattering autumn colors-all the rave this season.

  10. You’d be grouchy too if someone snatched. Gods creatures are amazing!

  11. Aww, sweet lil’ ocean dweller. He looks like he’s made of glass!

  12. BEF and tung! pbbbth!

  13. That is one cute little fishy! His mouth is adorable…looks like a little cartoon fish caught mid-conversion!

  14. Blorp.
    Blorp blorp.

  15. Swim, baby Fugu, swim! Just stay away from the Japanese. They like to eat toxic fish for some reason. :/

  16. Two by two, hands of blue… er, purple.

    ‘Ya got yer darned picture, now put me back in the water, ya bass-turd!’

  17. Wait, there is such a thing as a lumpfish?! I thought NTMTOM was just being whimsical.

    But looking at pictures of baby lumpfish on google, I’m still not sure if it’s a lumpfish or a puffer.

  18. Fishie is covered with Swarovksi crystals! Tres glamorous!

  19. TrixandSam says:

    @Saffron: you’re right! Swarowski Fishie! And check out the symmetry of the circles around his mouf and up his forehead. Gorgeous!!!

  20. When I worked in a sealife centre, we had these fish in a quarantine tank.

    They were reluctant to eat for some reason, so we had to lift them out of the water, squeeze their belly to get them to open their mouths, and put food in them with tweezers.

    It was a pretty weird job.

  21. I think an extreme close-up of a fish tongue should be in order.

  22. @Sporkles: Took the words right outta my keyboard. Tiny Mouth Extreme Close-Up pretty please!

  23. I normally don’t think fish are all that cute, but jeez. Leave it to you guys to find one!

  24. Dear magic fish,

    I want a big paid-off Georgian mansion with a trust fund to pay the taxes and maintenance,
    A magic closet that will let me pull anything article of clothing and accessories out of it,
    Oh and world peace. Whatever.

  25. Oh he is Sporkaley! and cute

    Now MR Fish Genie… I need a Porshe and some cash .. Lots and lots of cash, a Miss Universe Tiara

    and World Peace!

  26. dewicasgwent says:

    Google Lumpfish on Balloon!

  27. beardediris says:

    Fish “tongues” are called “basihyals” and they aren’t very movable or useful, which means, little fishie can’t stick his out at me for being a smarty-pants and actually remembering something from high school biology.

  28. the bug man says:

    @Elsa: your lumpfish-feeding job made me laugh out loud. I once spent much of a summer convincing butterflies to eat. It consisted mostly of me unrolling their little tongues with a pin while reflecting on the absurdity of my employment.

  29. blorp….blorp…blorp…

  30. I am the walrus!

  31. This is not cute. Its mouth looks like a pee hole. Gross!

  32. cute little fishikins! I kinda want to put my finger in his tiny mouth, is that wierd?

  33. And it went wherever I did go…

  34. What perfect little outlined circles. How very polka-dotular!

    I agree with Rachel… Leave it to CO to find a cute fish. Wow. *golf clap*

  35. One Skunk Todd says:

    In little squeaky fish voice: “Wadda ya mean this isn’t The Presidents concert! I’m sure I made that left turn at Albu… er… Hawaii”

  36. @Kar: You forgot to specify that anything pulled out of the closet will automatically fit to perfection…..

    [bringing Mr. Fishie a bucket of salt water….hope I got the saline levels right]

  37. BLORP!

  38. Pokéfish!

  39. Blorp!Blorp!Blorp!Blorp!Blorp!Blorp!Blorp!

  40. GASP!

  41. Blorp Blorp Blorp….Means put me back ya big bully.

  42. Sweet LITTLE fishie. I wonder how big it will get when is/he is all growed up. Is this where we get Lumpfish caviar?

    Beautiful spots (lumps). It is a wonderful word, isn’t it?

    ButtaRumCake-just checking in- how you holding up?

  43. Sorry, this is not cute. This is something straight from a nightmare.

    [EEEEEK! 😯 – Ed.]

  44. Brooke, if your urethral opening looks like this fish… perhaps you should go see a doctor.

  45. I think he is just beautiful, warts and all; he looks like a gorgeous liddle glass paperweight
    (from Saks ov coarse, and tres xpensive……..!)

  46. rubber duck says:

    tiny blrp!

  47. OH. EM. GEE. I went wide eyed and smiley-faced when I saw this! It just made my day. I LOVE cute fishies, and this one takes the bait(cake)! lol… I love the versage and le hovertext…!

  48. Oooh, weensie fish tongue.
    *THUNK* (faints)

  49. I think “weensie ” is one of the best words ever…

  50. OMG he’s made of BUBBLE WRAP!

  51. Little fishy, get in my mouf and I will keep you moist and we can be best friends!
    Okay, now I just gave myself a really weird mental image. Can you imagine if you had this guy in your mouth and you walked up to people and opened your mouth and they saw this little face looking out? Now I want to get a fake fish and do this so I can see people’s reactions. Hmm, didn’t think I was in a weird mood today, but maybe it’s time to go get a cup of tea.

  52. He looks like Lardee!

  53. His face is like a perfect 😀

  54. One of God’s little creatures, who may very well think that the person holding hm/her is ugly, too! Scary at the very least. I like the idea of a “Wish Fish”.

    Kar, can I come over and we’ll play dress up? And then have tea party in many of your Georgian rooms!

  55. When we saw this fish at the aquarium, my husband and I had no idea what to make of it. We must’ve stared at it for at least 20 minutes just fascinated by it. lol. ok we’re dorks. >.<

    this one was stuck to the glass with it’s “sucker” O_O a bit weird, right??

  56. Paws and Claws says:

    Okay.. a little confused here… why are the comments closed on the picture posted AFTER this one, but comments still open on this one?…anyways, He is adorable, but he looks like he needs to go back into the water 😦 looks like he’s gaspins fer airs.

  57. @Jezebel — Totally! I couldn’t place where I had seen him before, until you said it!!! ❤

  58. @skippymom

    Especially if you had seethrough teeth!

  59. Queen of Dork says:

    He looks like he’s talking to the person holding him with this tough NY accent: Yo! Yo, hey bud, ya wanna put me back in da wadda? Before I hawk up somtin’ up atcha?
    Yeeah, yooze. Ho! I’m taulkin’ to yooze.

  60. kawaii!!! ^_^

  61. library_girl says:

    @Jezebel omg, no one knows who Lardee is!!! YAY!

  62. @QoD, there are intrepid fishermen who fish in our local waterways, and a comedian once speculated on what kind of fish they catch. “Stick a hook in my mouth, what are you, a moron? What, you think that tickles? Lemme stick a hook in your mouth, see how you like it.”

  63. PS “Wouldja watch the suckers? You know I spend a long time on my suckers.”

  64. Yes, we can have a tea and dress up party outside of my magic closet. In my Georgian mansion coincidentally in Georgia (USA).

    We’ll talk about ending world hunger over cucumber sandwiches.

  65. Lumpfeeeeeeesh.

  66. The fish wish you would put him back!

  67. He’s so SQUEE!!! But maybe we should put him in a bowl of ProActiv for his poor wittle skin probwem?

  68. peanut's mama says:

    Taj-your comment to Brooke made me LOL.

    How can anyone look at the teensie smiling blorp and say its not cute?!?!?! Y’all need GLASSES!!


  69. Awww! He looks crunchy! They should make a breakfast cereal out of those!

  70. Gabrielle Smith says:

    I can’t decide if I’m completely grossed out or charmed in a bumpy slimy kind of way. Hmm.

  71. you know who he reminds me of? Lardee from My Milk Toof. Anyone else see it?

  72. theotherMolly says:

    has no one noticed the little wet fin draped over the finger? Best part of the whole picture!

  73. Laaaaaaardeeeeeee!!!!!!
    Has anyone linked Inhae (maker of the world’s cutest teefs) to this?

  74. Lovelei, I didn’t think to link Inhae to this post, but someone totally should! I’m glad someone else sees the Lardee-ness of this little dude.

  75. It’s a lumpsucker! Either a Pacific Spiny or a Toad, I think. Their pelvic fins are modified into a suction disc so they can stick to things. That’s about as big as they get.
    Hard to believe, but the babies are even cuter, being tinier and more ehn-ful.

  76. Have you guys seen Blondie? The lumpfish from the New England Aquarium? Her trainer has gotten her to do all sorts of crazy things, like blow bubbles on command or swim through a hoop.

  77. So cute! His name should be Blub!