Knock-Knock!

Knock-knock!  (Who’s there?)
Isabelle!  (Isabelle who?)
Isabelle broken or something?  How come I gotta knock?

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Knock-knock!  (Who’s there?)
Annie!  (Annie who?)
Annie thing you can do, I can do better!

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Knock-knock!  (Who’s there?)
Norma Lee!  (Norma Lee who?)
Norma Lee this is where I deliver the punchline!

SNC12351

Knock-knock!  (Who’s there?)
Toyota!  (Toyota who?)
Toyota be a law against bad knock-knock jokes!

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There’s something fisheye going on here, Sanchia T.

This is an officially sanctioned Cute Overload “Knock-Knock Jokes” thread!

103 comments … read them below or add one

  1. crimson says:

    landshark!!

  2. ButtaRumCake says:

    *SQUEEEEE*

  3. Mo says:

    Ahhh…the days when SNL used to be funny and unique. :(
    Good one NTMTOM, as usual.
    Unfortch, don’t have a knock knock joke. Am still waking. Brain needs caff.

  4. marthava says:

    Dang… That is a whole lotta close-up yoogly!! Cute but yoogly! Cuoogly. Or, uglute. Take ur pick.

  5. fencerchick says:

    Knock-knock
    Who’s there?
    Orange
    Orange who?
    Orange you glad there’s nothing to nuff about here?

    **ducks rotten tomatoes and flees the stage**

  6. Kristabelle says:

    Too funny!!! Is that a pug and a boston?? It’s hard to tell!!

    Landshark!!! We always say, “Candygram!” at our house. :D

  7. Trabb's Boy says:

    Knock knock
    Who’s there?
    Suspense
    Suspense who?

  8. alwayscataddict says:

    Knock-knock
    Who’s there?
    Banana.
    Banana who?
    Knock-knock
    Who’s there?
    Banana.
    Banana who?
    Knock-knock
    Who’s there?
    Banana.
    Banana who?
    Knock-knock
    Who’s there?
    Banana.
    Banana who?
    Knock-knock
    Who’s there?
    Orange.
    Orange who?
    Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?

  9. Copperbat says:

    Knock-knock!

    Who’s there?

    Violet.

    Violet who?

    Violet you talk me into posting a knock-knock joke is beyond me.

  10. Trabb's Boy says:

    Knock knock
    Who’s there?
    Control freak. And now you say “Control freak who?”

  11. Kristabelle says:

    alwayscatadditct- I was going to do that whole thing, and you saved me the typing!!

    Trabb’s Boy – Control Freak who?

  12. Louise says:

    Knock Knock
    Who’s there?
    Fido.
    Fido who?
    Fido I have to stand out here?
    ———
    Knock Knock
    Who’s there?

    Sam and Janet.

    Sam and Janet who?

    :::sings::: Sam and Janet Evening:::

  13. eastiegirl says:

    Knock-knock! (Who’s there?)
    Dwayne! (Dwayne who?)
    Dwayne the bathtub, I’m dwowning!

    [I un-fixed your spelling, there. ;) - Ed.]

  14. Heather says:

    Zee French Bulldawg has zee cutest face Zimaginable.

    Squee~

  15. Jezebel says:

    My joke repetoire just got a little bigger!

  16. T.U.M. says:

    Knock knock?
    Who’s there?
    Maru!
    Maru who?
    Maru-mmate kicked me out; can I stay with you?

    Knock knock?
    Who’s there?
    Winston!
    Winston who?
    Winston, lose some.

  17. Knock Knock Jokes Woo Hooo!

  18. Theo says:

    Knock knock!
    who’s there?
    Hello Kitty!

    [sound of window opening]
    [hurried footsteps on fire escape]

    Knock knock?

  19. lala says:

    “knock knock!”

    “who’s there?”

    “interrupting cow.”

    “interrupti-”"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

    (i also know a better one with an interrupting starfish. FACEGRAB!)

  20. Calliope says:

    Knock knock!

    Who’s there?

    Interrupting cow.

    Interrupting co — MOOOO!

  21. Calliope says:

    Darn. Jinx.

  22. Once A Fish says:

    Knock Knock!

    Who’s there?

    Interrupting Starfish!

    Interrupting St—-
    (Knock knocker shoves open palm into door-opener’s face)

  23. Once A Fish says:

    Awww, lala beat me to it!

  24. llism says:

    Knock knock.
    Who’s there?
    Gestapo.
    Gestapo who?
    “VE VILL ASK ZE QUESTIONS!!”

  25. Gigi says:

    Knock Knock!

    Who’s there?

    Aardvark.

    Aardvark who?

    Aardvark a million miles for one of your smiles. :-)

  26. boler says:

    I have no comment but i want to know more about your services and if possible I wish to be a member because I love animals very much especially dogs

  27. KB in To says:

    Say “knock-knock.”

    Knock-knock.

    …………………???????

  28. Knock knock!
    Who’s there?
    Spaghetti-head McGee.
    Spaghetti-head McGee who?
    You know more than one Spaghetti-head McGee?!

    lala and others: There’s also an “interrupting koala” version where you hug the respondent, and an “interrupting turtle” where you say nothing but thrust your head sharply forward with a bug-eyed expression. (That one is best immediately following the cow.)

  29. And, of course:

    I’ve got a great knock-knock joke! You start.
    Okay, knock knock.
    Who’s there?

  30. KatieZientek says:

    Knock knock!

    Who’s there?

    Nuffing.

    Nuffing who?

    Nuffing to get excited about.

  31. KNock Knock
    Whos There?
    Zany
    Zany who?
    Zany bondy Home?

  32. Robin Romain says:

    knock knock.
    Who’s there?
    I got up.
    I got up who?
    Well, the bathroom’s over there….

    ba da dum!

  33. @boler welcome to the club you don’t do anything to join you just join in. :)

  34. Wvaden says:

    Knock, knock
    Who’s there?
    Madame
    Madame who?
    Madame foot is caught in the door!

  35. Hon Glad says:

    Knock,knock
    Who’s there?
    Freezer
    Freezer who?
    Freezer jolly good fellow.

  36. Laura says:

    Knock-knock.
    Who’s there?
    Little old lady.
    Little old lady who?
    Hey, I didn’t know you could yodel!

    Knock-knock.
    Who’s there?
    Boo!
    Boo who?
    Don’t cry, it’s only a joke!

  37. Metz says:

    Knock Knock
    Who’s there?
    Cows go.
    Cows go who?
    Wha? Cows Don’t go “Who?”, Cows go “Moo!”

  38. Kar says:

    What Knockers!

    Thank you.

  39. KatieZientek says:

    @Kar: Nice!

  40. Copperbat says:

    T.U.M. = W.I.N.

  41. Kiragirl says:

    Knock knock!
    Who’s there?
    Theo.
    Theo who?
    Theowta be a law against this!

    Knock knock!
    Who’s there?
    Nobody.
    Nobody who?
    Nobody knows the trouble I’ve seen….

  42. Kiragirl says:

    @Shiny: eh?

  43. Suzanne says:

    omg…you peeps are hilarious. And I now have enough knock knock joke ammo to decimate the nieces and nephews this year at Thanksgiving!

  44. cath says:

    Knock knock.
    Who’s there?
    Gunga Din.
    Gunga Din who?
    Open de door, I Gunga Din!

  45. Knock Knock
    whos there?
    Bunny
    Bunny who?
    a bunny thing happened on my way to the office.

  46. ButtaRumCake says:

    I am @ work giggling myself silly! These are the best knock-knocks EVAR!!!!!
    I’m gonna try these on my 11-year-old tonight!

  47. ButtaRumCake says:

    LOLZ @ Cath…GungaDin HAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!!!

  48. eastiegirl says:

    @Theo – Thanks for un-fixing my spelling. I always said it as “dwowning” also, but I did know if others did. haha

  49. victoreia says:

    Knock knock.
    Who’s there?
    Wish.
    Wish who?
    Wish I knew me some knock knock jokes.

    [quickly limps off stage]

  50. cath says:

    @ Trabb’s boy: Hi Mom!! *waves*

  51. Trabb's Boy says:

    @ cath

    Hi, dear! *waves back* Who the hell are you?

    Love, Trabb’s Boy

  52. Courtney says:

    These knock-knock jokes are cracking me up!

    Knock knock!
    Who’s there?
    Who.
    Who who?
    What are you, an owl?

  53. Rachael says:

    Knock knock!
    Who’s there?
    Pig
    Pig who?
    Pig up your feet or you’ll twip

  54. Theresa says:

    Knock Knock
    Who’s there?
    Knock Knock
    Who’s there?
    Knock Knock Knock Knock?
    Who’s there?
    Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock
    Oh, it’s Philip Glass. :mrgreen:

  55. JupiterStar says:

    WOW, Theresa. That one made me laugh so hard that my flatmates started knocking on my door to see what was wrong. I’m so dragging that out at my next modern music lecture on Thursday.

  56. loribug says:

    One of the few jokes I can remember from my youth:

    Knock Knock
    Who’s there?
    Cantaloup
    Cantaloup who?
    Cantaloup tonight, my dad’s got the car.

  57. Kiragirl says:

    or….

    Cataloup tonight, my dad’s got the ladder.

    Cataloup tonight, my dad’s got the shotgun.

  58. CB says:

    Knock Knock.
    Who’s there?
    I eat mop.
    I eat mop who?
    Dude…that’s just gross.

  59. Kiragirl says:

    @Jupiterstar,
    I hope you said
    Who’s there?

  60. Taryn says:

    What sort of hosts are these? Leaving those adorable guests to stand out there repeatedly knocking – the nerve!

    Then again, neither guest brought a gift I see. Shame, shame.

  61. Kris10 says:

    HAHAHAHAHAHAAH PHILIP GLASS!!

  62. DaytimeDeb says:

    Trabb’s Boy, I love the control freak one! I must remember to share with my therapist. She seems to think I am a bit of a C.F. But I told her she is wrong so that is that.

    Theo: The “hello kitty” is hilarious!

    ShinyHappyGoth: I wonder if I know anybody who will still fall for that one. I’ll give it a try later today.

    T.U.M….. incorporating Maru and Winston, WIN! You da man (Actually I have no idea of you are then man or the woman, or something else altogether, so no offense if I called you a man and you’re not… oh dear, I’m still so worried about ’nuffers that I get nervous everytime I post….)

  63. Kristabelle says:

    Ok, so cute overload finally made me look up something – Philip Glass. And, come to find out, he’s from Baltimore! Go us! :D I am going to use that knock knock joke the next time I see my choir director.

  64. Fluffy says:

    knock knock
    Who’s there?
    Amos.
    Amos who?
    Amosquito bit me!

    knock knock
    Who’s there?
    Andy.
    Andy who?
    Andy bit me again!

  65. Saffron says:

    @Theresa….AWESOME Philip Glass joke

    Curled tongue in pic 2 has keeeled me.

    Knock knock
    Who’s There?
    Tom Sawyer
    Tom Sawyer who?
    Tom saw yer underwear.

    Knock knock
    Who’s there?
    General Lee
    General Lee who?
    Generally I do not enjoy knock knock jokes but the ones in CO are great!

  66. Von Zeppelin says:

    Thank you, Theresa. Isn’t she great, folks? (Crowd roars approval, standing ovation, Theresa graciously receives immense bouquet of roses, gives crowd the Queen Elizabeth Wave)

  67. SnowyOwl says:

    Knock knock
    Who’s there?
    Cargo
    Cargo who?
    Cargo beep! beep!

    Knock knock
    Who’s there?
    Doris
    Doris who?
    Doris open. Why’d you knock?

  68. Pear3 says:

    Only a dolphin? Well, alright.

  69. Theresa says:

    Why thank you Von Zep, and all my loyal subjects. Here I go, and all the people rejoice:

  70. Ernie says:

    Here’s my fave, courtesy of M*A*S*H:

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Abe Lincoln.
    Abe Lincoln who?
    Don’t you know who I am?!?

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Thomas Jeferson.
    Thomas Jefferson who?
    Was Abe Lincoln just here?
    :)

  71. Kar says:

    Remember Theresa, it’s

    Wrist-Wrist
    Elbow-Elbow
    hand never goes above the tiara.

  72. bookworm says:

    Knock Knock

    Who’s there?

    “Mad Cow”

    Mad Cow who?

    “Mooooooo mother****er, mooooo!”

    or, slightly more family-friendly:

    Knock knock

    Who’s there?

    Anita

    Anita who?

    Anita hug!

  73. Von Zeppelin says:

    Thank you, Theresa, for the video of your modest progress from Buckingham Palace. I thought the coach a little. . . plain. Surely an important occasion calls for something a bit more elegant. Perhaps a 1976 Chrysler Cordoba, with the “soft Corinthian leather.”

  74. Ent says:

    Knock Knock
    Who’s there?
    Zebra
    Zebra who?
    Ze Bra holds up Ze Boobs.

    I told this this weekend. It was my favorite at like 6 y/o because I could say BEWBS! in a joke.

  75. rpennefe says:

    AH! What a lovely day on Cuteoverload!

    Knock knock.
    Who’s there?
    Unite.
    Unite who?
    Unite a person, you call him sir.

  76. Theresa says:

    VonZep, what Buckingham Palace? That was me, going from home to my subway stop. :mrgreen:

  77. Emily S. says:

    @ Kar and Theresa

    I always heard:
    Elbow-Elbow
    Wrist-Wrist
    Touch your pearls, then blow a kiss!

    I mean…what kind of royalty would you be without pearls….*shudders*

    =)

  78. ButtaRumCake says:

    Yep – my 11-year-old giggled herself silly!

    THANKS CO!!!

  79. Queen of Dork says:

    Great knock-knock jokes! I don’t have a knock knock joke but this joke is kind of cute.

    What’s brown and sticky?

    (gee, I don’t know. What’s brown and sticky?)

    A brown stick!!

    *running and ducking from rotten vegetables filling the air*

  80. Lerrinus says:

    *dies laughing* :-D

  81. shuger02135 says:

    At my house it always goes like this:

    Knock, knock.
    Me: Who’s th..
    Dog: WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOFWOOFWOOFWOOFWOOF….

    I wonder how many interrupting cows have simply left in frustration.

  82. Katz says:

    You guys forgot Interrupting Iguana, where you stick out your tongue.

    For you nerdy types, there’s also interrupting coefficient of friction.

  83. AnnRan says:

    Knock knock.
    Who’s there?
    Iguana.
    Iguana who?
    Iguana wish you a spooky Halloween!

    (Works for many special occasions: Iguana wish you a Merry Christmas, Happy Birthday, etc.)

  84. Sanchia T. says:

    Kristabelle,
    one is a frenchbulldog and the other one is a pug :)
    please visit the comic strip version of them on http://www.the-slyndicates.blogspot.com

  85. Subhangi says:

    Squeeeeee!
    *groan*
    Squeeeeee!
    *groan*
    Squeeeeee!
    *groan*
    Squeeeeee!
    *groan*…

    [ad infinitum]

  86. Kar says:

    Emily S,

    I think that’s for Beauty Pageant Queens when they touch their sash like they don’t quite believe they’ve won.

    I don’t think we need Princess Anne or Her Royal Highness blowing kisses like a bad Marilyn Monroe impersonator.

  87. Resriechan says:

    1) Madly Adorable doggy-woggies — could use a *Slobbery Tongue Enhancement Closeup*, tho !

    2)Nice goofysillly k-k jokes ! Hooray for feeling 8 years old & not regretting it!

    3) Theresa & VZ: tres elegante, Madame & Monsieur !!!! The Brits are so skilled at Pomp & Stuffiness, are they not?

    (VZ, at this moment, are you still *pretty certain,* that you are a male hominid?
    Last time we checked — during the Feetsball Discourse — you mentioned various possibilities but stated that you *were pretty sure* of the gender & species identification…If it has shifted, then, the ending to my #3 needs adjustment(s)) ….

  88. T.U.M. says:

    Knock knock.
    Who’s there?
    There who?
    What?
    Well, if you want to know who this guy There is, you’ll have to give me some more details.

  89. Babs says:

    (I don’t think anyone’s done this one yet.)

    (Def. one for the younger set. Anyway, nowhere near the luminosity of Lady Theresa.)

    Knock knock.
    Who’s there?
    Atch.
    Atch who?
    Gezundheit!

    (Or “Bless you!”)
    (Or “You’re sooooo good-looking!”)

  90. mumrik says:

    shiny>> that one was BRILLIANT!!!

  91. mumrik says:

    ehrm…
    i was commenting on the one where the other person starts the joke.
    HILARIOUS, that one!

  92. doggabone says:

    @ Emily S.: Somehow, that sounds naughty when I read it. Some oddity of my brain, no doubt.

    @Queen of Dork: My favourite dumb not-knock joke:
    Q: What’s the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
    A: Anyone can roast beef.

    My favourite knock-knock:
    A) Say, ‘Knock-knock’.
    B) Knock-knock
    A) Who’s there?
    B) …

  93. doggabone says:

    Oh, shiny beat me to it and I missed it on first scan. Still my fave though.

  94. Foyertopp Squeat says:

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Salmon.
    Salmon who?
    Salmon enchanted evening.

    (Especially effective when it immediately precedes the “Sam-and-Janet” version.)

  95. Val says:

    Hilarious! Its like the dogs know your lookin. Love the jokes!

  96. Val says:

    I dont know any knock knock jokes at the moment…
    But my favorite is about a one eye parrot and pirate that I can never tell with a straight face.

  97. fooms says:

    Knock knock
    Who’s here?
    Wet.
    Wet who?
    Wet me in, it’s waining!

  98. Lars says:

    I swear I just made this one up … inspired by all of you …

    Knock knock.
    Who’s here?
    Wurlitzer.
    Wurlitzer who?
    [Elvis voice] Wurlitzer one for the money, two for the show, three to get ready, now go, cat, go …

  99. Me says:

    Ya didnt pay ya loan now we need ta talk!
    Of course were just ganna talk…
    But we run a business…
    And the boss aint happy

  100. Homer & Maggie's Mom says:

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Esther.
    Esther who?
    Esther bunny!

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Cargo.
    Cargo who?
    Cargo beep beep & run over the Esther bunny.

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Boo.
    Boo who?
    Don’t cry – the Esther bunny will be back next year!

    Sorry, y’all … I’m apparently re-living my early childhood back in parochial school.

  101. Carol says:

    Thanks for making this dreary, cold, wet day brighter and full of laughter.

  102. grace says:

    KNOCK, kNOCK.
    WHO’S THERE?
    GRACE.
    GRACE WHO?
    GRACE SKIES ARE GONNA CLEAR UP – PUT ON A HAPPY FACE!

  103. mom2twinzz says:

    @home and maggie’s mom

    of course the whole thing:
    Knock,knock.
    Who’s there?
    Ether
    Ether who?
    Ether bunny.

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Juan
    Juan who?
    Juan more ether bunny.

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Stella
    Stella who?
    Stella nother ether bunny.

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Justin
    Justin who?
    Justin other Ether Bunny.

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Samoa
    Samoa who?
    Samoa Ether Bunnies.

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Beryl
    Beryl who?
    Beryl of ether bunnies.

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Dewey
    Dewey who?

    Dewey have to listen to any more ether bunny jokes?

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Consumption.
    Consumption who?
    Consumption be done about all these ether bunnies?

    Knock, knock.
    Who’s there?
    Cargo
    Cargo who?
    Cargo “beep, beep”…run over all the ether bunnies.