Secrets of Ethical Magic!

For longer performances, you may be required to have various animals secreted about your person for extended periods.  To ensure their comfort and well-being, always provide snacks just before going onstage.

ham in sleeve scaled

Comments

  1. Sure, just make sure you don’t leave crumbs in my hat. People keep thinking I have really weird dandruft.

  2. “Hey Rocky, watch me pull a gerbil out of my bathrobe sleeve!”
    “Again?”

  3. Wow, what a great new fashion idea – loose sleeves and hammies! I’m goin’ shopping folks! (I know it’s a bathrobe but I think the idea can be adapted…)

  4. Oh – and look at the teeny hands!!! (*squeee*)

  5. 260Oakley says:

    Wearing your ham on your sleeve.

  6. Von Zeppelin says:

    The snack is a very thoughtful idea. The hamsters get really hungry hiding in your armpits for several hours before the performance.

  7. OOOOOOoooooooh, I want one of THOSE housecoats for Christmas!!! SQUEEEE!

  8. OMG this so reminnded me of my youngest and her pet rat Templeton .. she went every where with my daughter.. my favortie rememberance was when we were at McDonalds and She peeked out of my daughters sleeve to get a french fry.. LOL scared the heck out of the lady at the next table for a second.. then of course came all the questions

    Yes they make excellent pets. Yes they are clean
    yes they are fun
    and what they like to eat…. fruit, nuts, veggies and cheese and occasionally a personal pancake with fruit jam on it.and of course Life cereal We can not forget the life cereal….

  9. snorglepup says:

    I’m not sure I like the idea of having various animals secreted about my person for extended periods. Sounds kinky!

  10. AuntieMame says:

    TA-DAAAAAAA!

    Big enough for you, Mr. Hampants?

  11. AuntieMame, shouldn’t that be “Mr Hamsleeve”? :P

  12. catloveschanel says:

    ew, I put the emphasis on the wrong syllable and read “secreted” wrong, I was grossed out, but now I see what you’re saying.

  13. This reminds me so much of when Boo, our first budgie hatchling, was first hatched. He used to like to scurry up the sleeves of my bathrobe. We always thought a kimono would be an excellent garment for people who were handraising budgies!

  14. OK you provided the food thanks, but now I need to…you know… visit Mother Nature… So when do we go on? WHAT!!! We’re the last act! You know a good dry-cleaner I hope. :-(

  15. That bathrobe looks heavenly. :) I used to let my ferrets camp out in my bathrobe sleeves. Or in the pockets… I loved feeling their warmth- and the occasional nip? Well that just keeps you on your toes.

  16. Tony James says:

    Is that a Snuggie(tm)?

  17. Teensy weensy hands!!! *thud*

    Oh poo, both my bathrobes are hamfree zones. *sulk*

  18. @Rachael, “poo” may be the reason why? :mrgreen:

    @TonyJames, that would be a really upscale Snuggie, if such a thing exists. That looks pretty comfy and inviting, while Snuggies are kind of scary-looking, particularly in large numbers and public places.

  19. Dear Kat- I hope I may ask you a few questions; your comment just brought up latent questions I have always wanted answered: what color is a budgie egg? How big is it? How big is the chicklet? How long does Mrs. Bugdie, um, gestate? Can I live at your house? Your friend, fellow Peep and frustrated fan of budgies, K. (and thanks).

  20. Awwww! (little fingers and nose)
    nibble nibble needs a wittle mug to dip…

    Start the day with a healthy breakfast.

  21. Apparently, Expelliarmus works on Chex too.

  22. marguerite212 says:

    Wasn’t there a cat who followed Bertie Wooster around in the belief that Bertie had kippered herring secreted about his person?

  23. thedistractor says:

    Reminds me of Pixar’s “Presto” where the magician forgot to feed Alec the Rabbit before the show and paid dearly for it. This is a much safer way to do it.

  24. AuntieMame says:

    Hampants, Hamsleeve. All I know is that my clothing is hammie-free. Damn it.

    I got a Snuggie for my birfday! Or maybe it was the cheap knock-off, because frankly it’s not that warm. It’s less blankie and more thin craft felt. (Or maybe my house is just too cold.)

  25. Just this phrase: “various animals secreted about your person.” FTW.

  26. awwww! that made me chuckle. cute cute!!!

  27. My kids’ hamsters, Pip and Squeak, love to sit in pockets. We give them some food and they take a nap after they eat. Having a little cuddly ball of fluff in your pocket is the best! =)

  28. I’m with you, @catloveschanel & @Bryn. All I keep reading is something about animals and secretion….

    Ew!

  29. Um, it’s ‘secretted’. I myself secretted my Minnie Mouse in my pajama jacket pocket, until my Mom would see a pink tailio poking out as I tried to nonchalantly tuck it back in.
    ‘Secreted’ involves ooze and Golgi bodies.

    But h to the ellio, if I could secrete a pocket pet, I’d be up to the elbows in sugar gliders, chinchillas and fancy ‘amsters. And goo.

  30. Momma always told me that crumbs in bed would attrack animals, but if I’d have known how cute, I may not have minded and would have eaten those cookies in bed anyway.

  31. Did any other NeoPagans read “ethical magic” and think, “What does a hamster in your sleeve have to do with that?”

  32. haven’t we seen this one before? either way, cute hamham!!

  33. dub1, exactly what I was thinking – wish I could secrete some little warm fuzz balls like that hammie! I’d take the goo for that!

  34. Awww, hammy is in the green room!

  35. There is so such word as “secretted”, Dub 1.
    And yes, Marianne, we have definitely seen this hammie before…

  36. i_wuvs_puttins says:

    I did, Jen Hunter, and my first thought was “Ham None.”

  37. Tinnabeans56 says:

    you know what? Chinese Emperors used to do that with there dogs.

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