My Heart Will Blorp On

by Not That Mike The Other Mike on September 28, 2009

Of all the dangers faced by ancient mariners, none was more deadly or feared than the Giant Blorpular Sealberg.  These free-floating islands of blubber concealed as much as nine-tenths of their mass below the surface, just waiting to bounce any ship foolish enough to pass too close.

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{ 55 comments }

1 Chris 09.28.09 at 11:31 pm

But Mariners could avoid such a disaster by feeding a sealburg a fishy treat. And maybe giving it a kiss on da forehead.

2 Kelsois 09.28.09 at 11:35 pm

*squee!!!* he’s absolutely adorable!

3 Hon Glad 09.28.09 at 11:48 pm

“No, no, not even that aberrant leaf, shall spoil my inner calm”

4 TwilightGuru 09.29.09 at 12:13 am

ITS…………….SO………..FAT!!-(and cute)

5 CoconutCheez 09.29.09 at 12:15 am

just watched Glee again… and then i see THIS. Music to my heart. (and he looks really comfy so maybe it’s telling me to go to sleep)

6 debg 09.29.09 at 12:35 am

wish I could swim like this

7 Sinamon 09.29.09 at 12:56 am

and why is he/she swimming in gatorade? lol

8 Jimbeaux 09.29.09 at 1:14 am

He looks so serene! But still in need of a hug, of course! *hugs da blorpie!*

9 Trixie 09.29.09 at 1:15 am

I seriously ‘ahahahahah’ed at “my blorp will go on.”

10 victoreia 09.29.09 at 1:28 am

Hey! Where you find that picture of me?!?!

…Oh, wait. I don’t have whiskers…..

11 Theresa 09.29.09 at 1:46 am

By thy wild whiskers and beepable nose,
Wherefore bounceth thou me?

12 Hon Glad 09.29.09 at 1:53 am

T.resa – I bounce thee, and holpen thee up on thy palfrey

13 wannadance 09.29.09 at 3:14 am

i’d be bouncing around,too, if i were floating in green stuff of unknown origin with a random banana peel next to me. blory says ‘i’d clean up but i don’t got no hands. ’scuse the inexplicable mess. can i spend the night on board YER house?’

14 260Oakley 09.29.09 at 3:29 am

Blorpberg right ahead!

15 Jean 09.29.09 at 3:50 am

Is that a … feather?

Not so innocent a picture now, is it?

16 instituteofanimalhaberdashery 09.29.09 at 4:06 am

He looks just like my yoga instructor… no joke http://wp.me/pzgOa-57

17 earlybird1 09.29.09 at 4:23 am

I b’lieve that is a eucalyptus leaf, if my eyes do not deceive me…

This reminds me of warm piggy, but without the neck-life-jacket. Ahhnnn.

18 Resriechan 09.29.09 at 4:37 am

(?…Donde esta Leonrdo de Caprio?)

19 Resriechan 09.29.09 at 4:39 am

(oops:;) LeonArdo de C… )

20 Ellen W. 09.29.09 at 4:40 am

Look! It’s Rule of Cuteness #40: Aquatic Edition

I’m guessing this is a zoo blorp because, for some reason, zoos always have eucalyptus trees everywhere. I guess they look exotic?

earlybird1 Don’t mention the piggy- you’ll just rile them up again. (I thought it looked like hims too)

21 snorglepup 09.29.09 at 4:55 am

Looks like me in a wetsuit!
Ahh, I am one with the water…

22 Blondie 09.29.09 at 5:14 am

MUST SMOOCH!

23 Leilani 09.29.09 at 5:14 am

Acshully, if you look closely, you can see that he’s floating in rainbow stew.

24 Blondie 09.29.09 at 5:15 am

@Leilani: I see it! Now he and Mr Froggy can make the Rainbow Connection… :-)

25 T.U.M. 09.29.09 at 5:27 am

I don’t think I’ve ever been that happy in all my life.

26 Rachael 09.29.09 at 5:37 am

Blorpy McBlorpitude encased in lime jello. Ahhh, the bliss. :)

27 GoodMorningCall 09.29.09 at 5:54 am

Serious blorpitude.

In other news — can someone explain exactly why *blorp* is NOT in the glossary? It’s certainly made it into the lexicon at our house.

28 Emma 09.29.09 at 6:02 am

The bliss on his lisstle face is enchanting. Love!

29 Noelegy 09.29.09 at 6:07 am

It’s good to see that Wilford Brimley’s still active and getting some exercise. It’s good for the diabeetus, you know.

30 Laura K. 09.29.09 at 6:28 am

Noelegy–you made me snort my coffee…..

31 Elisha B. 09.29.09 at 6:33 am

…… I am so, like, jealous………

32 Sher 09.29.09 at 6:34 am

Awwwww….. he’s taking a face sunbath — in perfect calm and equilibrium. Niiiiiice!

33 Momcat 09.29.09 at 6:39 am

*Blorpular* AHHHH finally an accurate descriptor for my body! I can floats good too.

34 chanpon 09.29.09 at 6:42 am

That’s an odd looking buoy.

35 Gigi 09.29.09 at 6:55 am

It looks dreamy, you can see her wittle belly button, they wouldn’t let Barabra Eden show hers in I dream of Jinny good thing they dont have sensorship at the zoo.

36 jen 09.29.09 at 7:29 am

this blorp has an “insie”!!

37 Brenna 09.29.09 at 7:44 am

Awwww, he (?) must’ve been a cat in his previous life. He’s all “Sunbeam!!”

38 Kelsey 09.29.09 at 8:04 am

He looks like I could just hug him and he couldn’t do nufink about it!

39 Theresa 09.29.09 at 8:12 am

Hon Glad, I thank thee, I need all the holpen I can get. And all the palfreys, too.

40 T.U.M. 09.29.09 at 8:23 am

Reminds me of that old Cyndi Blorper song:

Well I see them every night in pools of green
In the pages of a blue buoy magazine
Hey I’ve been thinking of a new sensation
I’m picking up good vibrations

Do I wanna go out with a sea lion’s roar
I wanna go to the South pole and get me some more
I say (and it’s with all behooval)
I say this guy gets my seal of approval

She blorp, he blorp, a-we blorp
I blorp, you blorp, a-they blorp
Be-blorp, be-blorp-a-lu-blorp
I hope he will understand
She blorp, he blorp, a-we blorp
I blorp, you blorp, a-they blorp
Be-blorp, be-blorp-a-lu, she blorp
Oo, she do, she blorp, she blorp.

41 Katiedid 09.29.09 at 8:31 am

Oh the blorp-attude..

42 Vicki 09.29.09 at 9:22 am

Am I the only one who thought of the Floob-boober-bab-boober-bubs from Dr. Seuss’ On Beyond Zebra?

http://www.eve-golden.net/images/FloobsOPT–OK.jpg

43 GingerBean 09.29.09 at 9:32 am

My Heart Will Blorp On?? BWHAHAHA!

How about “My Blorp Will Go On”? Really, put the word “blorp” in just about any random sentence and it’s golden.
I love/hate how this site makes me laugh. Why hate? Because no one else I know seems to get why I find it so funny. Phooey.

44 Kristabelle 09.29.09 at 9:55 am

Thank you for that, TUM. :lol: I’m going to be singing that the rest of the day!!!!

45 Hon Glad 09.29.09 at 10:10 am

Theresa – I wit ye yeade.

T.U.M. – As I Only know ‘Girls just want to have fun’ I am perfectly willing to accept that Cyndi Lauper, er Blorper sings it .
Just for fun, why don’t you send it to her, or blorp it onto her website.

46 Mamamclain 09.29.09 at 10:31 am

Arrr, tis yer giant seal-slug, that un is. Arrrr.

47 Georgia 09.29.09 at 11:42 am

the heading on this post is REDONK!!!! :D

48 Rooanne 09.29.09 at 12:58 pm

Blorp!!!!! Bouncing baby blubber Blorps!
Um….. ok, wait, I can think of something better…. maybe…..

49 Von Zeppelin 09.29.09 at 3:02 pm

@Vicki–I remember the floob-boober-bab-boober-bubs! They float around like blubbery tubs. I have always been pretty fond of high gargalorums, thnadners, and quandaries also. Best Seuss book in the entire canon of the Doctor’s work.

(Don’t have my copy in front of me–what was the name of the shy little creature with one rabbitty ear? Definitely a CO candidate!)

50 skippymom 09.29.09 at 3:55 pm

VonZeppelin, I believe you refer to the Flunnel. (And yes, I had to look through the book.)

51 KatieZientek 09.29.09 at 4:53 pm

teh belly button!!! *dead*

52 Andy 09.29.09 at 8:16 pm

@Vicki – No, you’re not. First thing I thought when I saw the photo, though I’d have had to look in the book (which is on a shelf eight feet from where I sit) to remember their name. I would have posted a reference to them myself, if I hadn’t perused the comments first to see if someone beat me to it. Good job. (Likewise to skippymom for remembering the Flunnel, lookup or no. Too bad he’s been out of his tunnel just one-th, eh?)

53 kodalai 09.30.09 at 11:18 am

Does anyone else suspect that he just ate a seagull?

54 Vicki 09.30.09 at 3:00 pm

@Andy: I didn’t even need to look up the name in my copy of the book (which happens to be in the other room). On Beyond Zebra is, I think, my favorite Seuss book. I read it so many times when I was little.

55 christina gouthro 10.01.09 at 10:26 am

HAHAHAHAHA

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