Oh Great and Terrible Monkey God…

by Not That Mike The Other Mike on August 17, 2009

… who nourishes our forest with gentle life-giving rains,
… who blesses us with interesting feet that can grab things,
… who makes heavy the trees with delicious fruits that are very hard to open,
… who causes the theme from “The Benny Hill Show” to reverberate inside our tiny heads whenever we frolic and scamper through the treetops,

… all glory and pudding be upon thee, forever and ever, aaaaaaaa-monnnnk…

Guess what?  MONKEY BUTT!

(OK, this is an ape, not a monkey, but we like the sound of “monkey butt,” so deal.)

{ 71 comments }

1 Lizzums 08.17.09 at 6:24 am

Um I think he’s got a little tissue hanger-onner there…. Let me get that for you, o pious one.

2 Bryn 08.17.09 at 6:25 am

Crying-laughing at Benny Hill theme song ref. Because what other soundtrack can accompany chimps frolicking?

3 Leslie (NTA) 08.17.09 at 6:27 am

Please turn to page 72 in your Hymnals:

“Hey, hey, we’re the Monkeez; people say we Monkee around; but
we’re too busy” [prayin'] “to put anybody down” …

4 Camille 08.17.09 at 6:31 am

…To be followed by the Chuck Berry classic “Too Much Monkey Business”

5 Illise 08.17.09 at 6:32 am

maybe he is playing hide and seek lol
so cuteeeeeeeee lovely way to start the day thank you so much

6 T.U.M. 08.17.09 at 6:34 am

Glory and pudding to the monkey god? Nay! ALL GLORY TO THE HYPNO-TOAD!

7 Lucas 08.17.09 at 6:41 am

Oh that’s almost obscene!

8 Kristabelle 08.17.09 at 6:42 am

Awww, teeny tiny monkey butt!!!

9 chanpon 08.17.09 at 6:46 am

O Handsome Monkey King, Great Sage, Equal to Heaven, of the Water-Curtain Cave in the Mountain of Fruit and Flowers…

10 Theo 08.17.09 at 6:49 am

OK, I’ll grant that “Monkey Butt” is intrinsically funny, sure, but how about “Ape Arse”? Not so much? Hmm.

11 Not That Mike The Other Mike 08.17.09 at 6:51 am

“Simian Situpon,” perhaps?

[*snort*/LOL - ottomanorangutan? - Ed.]

12 Leslie (NTA) 08.17.09 at 6:55 am

Leave it to Theo, to let us know, that there is such a thing as
Anti-Monkey B____ Powder …….
(or at least, that a webpage exists which CLAIMS to offer such a product)

[Seriously, it's 100% real. They sell it in at least one hardware store near me. - Ed.]

13 Von Zeppelin 08.17.09 at 6:58 am

Are we sure this chimp is bent down for worship? He seems to be looking for his contact lens.

14 thepetmuseum 08.17.09 at 7:00 am

What a tender, sweet little fella – I wonder what kind of ape he is?

15 M 08.17.09 at 7:08 am

@chanpon: Monkey King reference FTW! :D

16 260Oakley 08.17.09 at 7:09 am

Not much junk in the trunk on this monk

17 derz 08.17.09 at 7:22 am

i’m going to slightly nuff but then it’ll be said and I’ll move on.. but it also has a compliment too!

Just seeing the monkey pic I was slightly “ew.” like.

But reading the caption, made the picture great!

hearhear to our great post-ers and their witty captions =)

18 kibblenibble 08.17.09 at 7:31 am

Illise: I agree it does look like he’s playing hide and seek. “98, 99, 100, ready or not, here I come!”

19 SusaninMI 08.17.09 at 7:59 am

With ears like that, this is definitely NOT the “hear no evil” monkey . . .

20 SusaninMI 08.17.09 at 8:01 am

apples, peaches, punkin pie, who’s not ready, holler oo-oo-ee-ee-eeeeeeeeee

21 claudia 08.17.09 at 8:50 am

So I show up, see the dialogue… and with a title like that, I refrain from scrolling down to see the picture. And when I am done reading, I scroll down…

Talk about awesome, LOL!! Well done, made me guffaw… lol

22 Nikki 08.17.09 at 8:50 am

“…And may bunches of bananas rain down from the skies…Amen.”

(LOL at the Benny Hill theme song.)

23 Mud Bug 08.17.09 at 8:57 am

@ thepetmuseum,
Just chiming in with Theo Yes, they really do sell it ! My brother in law got his own can from “Santa” a couple of years ago after Santa found a large supply at several truck stops while moving from Florida to Washington state. Even Santa couldn’t resist a product called “Monkey Butt Powder” !

24 Katrina 08.17.09 at 9:12 am

Nikki- Ow!

25 Nancy (orig) 08.17.09 at 9:40 am

is he peaking into the outhouse???

26 Corina 08.17.09 at 9:41 am

Well, actually it IS a monkey.
It just happens to also be an ape. Apes are a subclade of monkeys, just as we are a subclade (or used to be when there were more homo species) of the apes.

It’s a bit more complicated than that, but just think of it like integers rational numbers. You can be an integer (ape), but you are also a rational number (monkey). But not all rational numbers are integers.

Anyways…
KYYYUUUUUUUTTTEEEE.

27 Theresa 08.17.09 at 10:11 am

Oh, so sweet! Time again for a Peter Gabriel — he goes GREAT with Benny Hill!!

Doesn’t he? I thought he was a major influence? :mrgreen:

[NOOOOOO... oh my poor mind's ear... - Ed.]

28 Theresa 08.17.09 at 10:24 am

ALSO:
ETHNOMUSICOLOGY CORNER:
The “Kechak” or Monkey Chant– a bit of Indonesian awesomeness, based on an episode of the epic “Ramayana”:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OExnkh4hxcE&feature=related

This honors the monkey who helped Prince Rama rescue his Princess Sita.

29 Nikki 08.17.09 at 10:24 am

@Theresa – If ever there was a time for Bananaphone, this is it.

[Link added. (Probably not 100% safe for work.) I am on FIYAH today. :twisted: - Ed.]

30 Theo 08.17.09 at 10:34 am

…holy crap, there’s a BananaPhone.org??
(hint: There is.)

31 Nikki 08.17.09 at 10:35 am

OMG, Theo–on FIYAH indeed, Sir! Where did you find THAT version?!? You’ve always got so many tricks up your sleeve. You’re always up to some kind of monkey business…

32 KittyAdventures 08.17.09 at 11:10 am

Said in tv news anchor voice

IS there a monkey God? key evidence was uncovered today that in deepest africa a tribe of teenie tinie monkies have found conclusive proof of a monkey god who demands worship from the top of a jungle out house
and was also the origins of the phrase Monkey business.
Full story at 11

33 Theresa 08.17.09 at 11:45 am

@KittyAdventures, there is a monkey god, Hanuman, but he’s Asian. Don’t know about African.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hanuman

34 Theresa 08.17.09 at 11:47 am

THeo, truly en fuego!

35 Lucy's Mommeh 08.17.09 at 12:11 pm

Amazing. You people actually beat me on the Anti Monkey Butt Powder. A friend gave it to us as a joke, but sitting on a motorcycle seat for hours makes you appreciate it!

http://www.antimonkeybutt.com/

And also, good to see someone else pays attention to Hindu Mythology & knows who Hanuman is!

You peoples is cultured!

36 Lucy's Mommeh 08.17.09 at 12:14 pm

Better than Wikipedia…check out the Hanuman article at exoticindia.com

http://exoticindia.com/article/hanumana

37 thatonegirlannie 08.17.09 at 12:24 pm

one, two, three… ready or not, here i come!

38 Mary (the first) 08.17.09 at 12:34 pm

Oh yeah, I’ve bought Monkey Butt Powder (as a gift.) I went to the hardware store looking for it, told the lady what I wanted (only a little shamefacedly) and she pointed it out on the counter ** next to the register!!** . Apparently it’s very popular at holiday time.

39 T.U.M. 08.17.09 at 1:09 pm

Back in my college primatology class, we called Hanuman Langurs “Handyman Langurs.” Just for the funny.

40 monkeybuttsmine 08.17.09 at 1:24 pm

I like the sound of Monkey Butt so much, we named our cat Monkeybutt! (He has a tail that curls up and splays a bit, exposing the butthole proudly!)

41 AuntieMame 08.17.09 at 1:39 pm

Hey, watch who you’re callin’ an integer!

(Ha…monkey butt, monkey butt!)

I’ve never seen Anti Monkey Butt powder, but I have seen Boudreaux’s Butt Paste in the baby aisle.

42 Kim 08.17.09 at 1:54 pm

Who are these crazy people who don’t like monkeys? I just want to give this sweet little guy big snorgles! Love!

43 Pebble 08.17.09 at 2:03 pm

someone shaved his ‘tocks or what? weird…

44 Ant 08.17.09 at 2:26 pm

Nice chicken butt joke reference. :P

45 Katrina 08.17.09 at 2:28 pm

It was deep, deep into the New Guinean Jungle. Remembering how Prince Rama rescued his Princess Sita, young lemur scientist Welsey Boondoggle lay restlessly tossing, his perspiration highlighting the moonlight on his soft mattress, thinking, no, longing for his own Princess Sita, the lovely…..

46 Nikki 08.17.09 at 2:37 pm

LMAO Katrina! You just can’t help yourself, can you?! Are you bringing VonZep with you? :)

47 Theresa 08.17.09 at 2:55 pm

And nobody, of course, has Prouder Buttocks™ than a Monkeh. :mrgreen:

48 fish eye no miko 08.17.09 at 3:12 pm

Primate patootie!

49 Katrina 08.17.09 at 3:14 pm

I hope so, Nikki! Theresa- that was one of the very original Berthservant’s years ago, wasn’t it? I love the trademark symbol-you are a geeeenius! Berthaservant-come shine again with Von Zeppelin!

50 Nikki 08.17.09 at 3:21 pm

Katrina and Theresa, LOLOL — the last installment of The Proud Buttocks was last May, I believe, when two little mini-marmies were snorgling with Brazen Abandon on this very website…(that is, of course, until earlier today, when VonZep and Katrina began the next chapters, deep in the jungle…) Been chuckling all day.

51 Lucy's Mommeh 08.17.09 at 3:23 pm

I’ve seen Anti Monkey Butt Powder at the register at Tractor Supply.

52 Leslie (NTA) 08.17.09 at 3:45 pm

I’m enjoying all the sidetracks that have developed from this stream ….however I feel compelled to mention that they are a bit ……….odd. Humorous, but …….odd !!!
Anti Monkey B__ Powder ?? Bananaphones? (sigh).
BTW, I did particularly enjoy the silly vaudevillian-style music, BEHIND the Bananaphone song.

Carry on.

53 Joools 08.17.09 at 3:58 pm

Thank heavens I can’t recall the Benny Hill theme song, so I just have Peter Gabriel going round and round… AACK! Just the act of typing those words brought it up from the deep!! Forget Monkey Butt Powder, anybody out there got a cure for Chronic Earworm??

54 Not That Mike The Other Mike 08.17.09 at 4:02 pm

@Jools: What’s that you say? You can’t recall the Benny Hill theme music?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HTiQDyVv7KQ

[I know an earworm when I see one, and I am NOT clicking that link. - Ed.]

55 MLO 08.17.09 at 4:37 pm

Uh…are we sure he’s not just fallen asleep in an awkward position?

“Oh Great and Terrible Monkey God….who sends gentle rains in the pumpkin floating bearszzzzzzzzzz…..”

56 JudyRB 08.17.09 at 4:40 pm

Teho – you have to click it – just turn down the volume – the video is great that goes with it!!! Thanks NTMTOM for the link and for the story.

57 colleenincairns 08.17.09 at 4:53 pm

Ok…so i can’t see you…so you can’t see me..so no-one’s checking out my monkey butt…right ?

58 Theresa 08.17.09 at 5:55 pm

@Katrina, the PBs™ just make a deep impression on my mind. :mrgreen:

59 hadley 08.17.09 at 7:12 pm

I loves it!

60 Rich Fader 08.17.09 at 7:20 pm

“…and Shiva spake and said, ‘TOUCH my monkey! LOVE him!’”

61 Subhangi 08.17.09 at 10:46 pm

Awwww! It’s a bebeh MONK-ey!

*rimshot*

62 Kate 08.18.09 at 12:30 am

*nerd alert*
@Corina~ Sorry, I’m a bit OCD about this subject. An ape is not a monkey. Both, along with hominids, are suborders of Anthropoids which is a suborder with Prosimians (think lemurs) of Primates.

So, actually, it goes
Primates
Anthropoids (or Prosimians)
Monkeys or Apes or Hominids

*nerd alert over*

63 Katrina 08.18.09 at 5:35 am

Oh, Theresa, yes, it did. I think it took us all by pleasant surprise. I’m going to jump over to the (shiver) bulldog thread to see if our novella has been amended- here’s hopin’!

Kate- the world needs nerds, especially ones who are denizens of CO. Carry on!

64 Noelegy 08.18.09 at 5:58 am

Yakety Sax! A local radio show host is plagued by an impish producer who plays that whenever the host tries to do math. And we watched “Babe: Pig in the City” last night, so this picture is making me think of the monkeys.

65 Rainbowbaby 08.18.09 at 7:05 am

OMG! Haha he’s top heavy! *ker-plunk* “nehh not again!”
I want this lil dood NOW. GIMME!

66 blair 08.18.09 at 8:08 am

hail mary

full of grace

i will not fling poo

in my sister’s face

[...dona eis rectum - Ed.]

67 Paunchie 08.18.09 at 8:20 am

Guess what? Monkeh butt.

Big earses hes got too!

68 Katrina 08.18.09 at 10:19 am

Nope, nobody is commenting on the bulldog thread. Is the Novella dead? Ho, hum…

69 jenatron 08.18.09 at 12:32 pm

Thank you Kate – I was looking to see if someone would clear that up. Apes, though related, are not a subdivision of the Monkeys . . . Hey, Hey

70 Corina 08.19.09 at 10:13 am

@ Kate
Since apparently I didn’t explain it correctly, I’m going to link you to this handy-dandy video about the evolution of the primate lineage (more specifically whether or not humans are apes and therefore monkeys).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=igq_niFmXNs

So yeah. We ARE monkeys. Or at least, from what I have studied in university, this is what I hold to be true.
You might have been thinking of the Linneas classification system.

71 Tess 08.19.09 at 11:22 am

I call my husband monkey butt. I love this pic! Thanks for sharing.

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