You Are No Match For My Stoat-fu!

by Not That Mike The Other Mike on July 6, 2009

Aiieeeeee! I shall defeat you with my Flying Crane Leap!  Hah! Soaring Monkey Punch!  Hai-YAH! Leaping Iguana Wedgie!  Bouncing Walrus Tickle!  Waddling Penguin Slap-Fighting!  Drunken Thompson’s Gazelle Karaoke Hibachi Boxing!

stoats

We humbly bow to your sender-innering skill, Laura S.

{ 43 comments }

1 scoobie 07.06.09 at 5:21 pm

What happened next?

[Waddya mean "what happened next"?? Have you ever seen a well-executed Leaping Iguana Wedgie? It's over, man. It is over. - Ed.]

2 Von Zeppelin 07.06.09 at 5:31 pm

Stoat on the left: “Oh, for God’s sake, Ralph, give it a rest, won’t you? All right, all right, I’m impressed with your fighting skills. Now, are we going out for pizza or not?”

3 Theo 07.06.09 at 5:33 pm

THERE IS NO PIZZA
THERE IS ONLY MASTER STOAT

4 Annie 07.06.09 at 5:46 pm

Only NTMTOM can randomly string words together so eloquently.

5 Theresa 07.06.09 at 5:48 pm

@VonZep, I was just thinking the stoat on the left just gives a disgusted look, and poulls out a gun.

6 Kittehmamax3 07.06.09 at 5:50 pm

Ed- don’t you mean,”Game over,man. Game over.”. Love it!!!

[Heh... but that'd be "Aliens", rather than any chop-socky flick I can think of. And Theresa's up there doing "Indiana Jones" too - Ed.]

7 i_wuvs_puttins 07.06.09 at 5:58 pm

Weasel style!

8 tudza 07.06.09 at 6:14 pm

Anything a stoat would do in a fight would properly be stoat style. Only a human will be doing things like crane punches in rat stance.

Kung fu, or whatever people prefer to call it these days, is Chinese. Karaoke and hibachi are Japanese words, unlikely to appear in the names of a Chinese martial art.

[Yes, yes... and while we're at it, "Bouncing Walrus Tickle" is neither Chinese nor Japanese, so where does that leave us? :| - Ed.]

9 Von Zeppelin 07.06.09 at 6:43 pm

Theresa: “Poulls out a gun?” Is this Clouseau-speak? Shouldn’t it be “Poulls eaout a guen?” Anyway, as I recall, Clouseau was a master of these stoat-Asiatic fighting moves in his battles with Cato.

10 Theresa 07.06.09 at 6:44 pm

snerk

11 Brenda 07.06.09 at 6:45 pm

I just think the photographer has a “gift” in their abilities. That pic is incredible! :-D

12 Alita 07.06.09 at 7:05 pm

The hovertext made my day.

13 5^^now8ing 07.06.09 at 7:19 pm

Well, speaking of Asia, bouncing walrus tickle must leave us off the coast of Siberia. ;-)
@ Von Zeppelin: “My stoat does nawt bite, but that ees not my stoat.

14 chanpon 07.06.09 at 7:45 pm

Invisible trampoline?

15 Patricia 07.06.09 at 7:49 pm

Makes me think of the song ‘Kung Fu Fighitng’ by Carl Douglas.

“Everybody was kung-fu fighting
Those cats were fast as lightning
In fact it was a little bit frightning
But they fought with expert timing”

16 Marianne 07.06.09 at 7:53 pm

this might be one of the greatest picture captures ever!

17 JR 07.06.09 at 7:54 pm

could that little guy look any less interested in what is happening here? lol aww

18 Lizzy 07.06.09 at 8:02 pm

Theo, don’t you mean, “There is no pizza. Only Zhoul?”

[There is no spoon... - Ed.]

19 Nikki 07.06.09 at 8:32 pm

Theo, NOMTOM and Von Zep, you three are my heroes today. Hilarious.

20 MoonCatty 07.06.09 at 8:34 pm

Ah… the deleted scene only found on the extra primo special edition of The Matrix DVD… where Morpheus and Neo discover that their residual self images are… stoats…

[Whoa, deja vu - Ed.]

21 Kar 07.06.09 at 8:57 pm

Oh lor, “That’s not my stoat.”

Look what you started Mike!

22 BabyOpossum 07.06.09 at 9:50 pm

Powered by Stoat-fu!

23 Emilia 07.06.09 at 10:56 pm

That is the cutest ninja I have ever seen. Oh man.

24 FUN N CUTE 07.07.09 at 12:58 am

Where’s my parachute???

25 hon glad 07.07.09 at 1:29 am

He’s stoatly executing the flying exclamation mark.

26 hon glad 07.07.09 at 1:31 am

oops, question mark.

27 Cambridge Rat Mom 07.07.09 at 4:19 am
28 chelonianmobile 07.07.09 at 4:50 am

D’awwwwwwwwww!

29 Noelegy 07.07.09 at 5:10 am

Wow, talk about being in the right place at the right time with a camera…

30 Kristabelle 07.07.09 at 6:24 am

Could be an outtake from Kill Bill!

RIP David Carradine

31 Katrina 07.07.09 at 8:34 am

Orrrrrr, is it a floating stoat?

32 Katrina 07.07.09 at 8:45 am

It might connote a floating stoat.

33 pyrit 07.07.09 at 9:00 am

“Nobody said anything to me about the Fu Monty!”

34 Zeki 07.07.09 at 9:35 am

XD yaaay this thing. <33 mustelidssss.

If you wanna see more pictures of these guys, albeit being much more calm, there's a set of them here: http://www.alamany.com/web_stoats/index.htm

35 LS 07.07.09 at 9:49 am

Bouncing, pouncing, baby stoat!

36 burvegas 07.07.09 at 5:13 pm

It’s the mustelid version of Hak Foo from the Jackie Chan Adventures cartoon! “Angry Crow Takes Flight!”
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Jackie_Chan_Adventures_characters#Villains

37 Julia (the one in BC) 07.07.09 at 9:44 pm

@ Von Zep (“Is this Clouseau-speak? Shouldn’t it be ‘Poulls eaout a guen’?”):

Reminds me of one of my favourite postcards (discovered in the UK in the early nineties): “Clouseau Fans Against The Beumb.” Never used the word “bomb” again…

38 Heather 07.08.09 at 5:51 am

I need a pet stoat. :) I need to find out more about these stoat creatures…are they in the weasel family?
Imagine that, a cute weasel…sounds like many of my old boyfriends. You always wish they weren’t cute.

39 Sheepy 07.08.09 at 6:00 am

…is the stoat on the left just waiting to sweep the leg?

(I mean, no one else had yet…)

40 Rio 07.08.09 at 9:32 pm

Ah, you are my favorite poster. Heelarious! :)

41 felonious_monk 07.08.09 at 9:38 pm

that’s the “invisible bicycle” he’s doing, if you want to get technical. in fact, i bet there was a bicycle under him that someone photoshopped out.

[LOLstoats! Oh noes! :P - Ed.]

42 Valerie 07.09.09 at 6:54 am

Jumper: Incoming!!!!!!!!

Victim: Remember you hafta sleep!

43 hjf in okc 07.09.09 at 9:39 pm

I wish to learn the art of Stoat Fu, by closely observing said stoat from the comfort of my own home.

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